


Happier Here

by jimingyu



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Emotional Hurt, Present Comfort, Self-indulgent fluff, Single dad Jeonghan, babysitter minghao, set in an unidentified american town, sorry abt that lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-31
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-03-12 01:32:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 38,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13536834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jimingyu/pseuds/jimingyu
Summary: Metaphorically, Jeonghan’s life had taken a sharp curve into a ditch, and not made its way back out yet. The ditch wasn’t the worst part (it was shielded from the wind, and offered a soft, grassy area for him to rest), nor was the fact that he was still in said ditch (he was planning how to get out).No, the worst part was that, in that ditch, he had been confronted with a girl whom he’d had a drunken one-night stand with.Not only that, but he was presented with a baby. His baby.~What really happened, was that Jeonghan made a mistake, brought a child into this world, and now had to deal with the consequences of his mistakes. The consequences are as follows: a chubby two-month-old baby girl named Yeona (she looked just like Jeonghan did when he was a baby, and it was a little scary); a lot of teasing from his co-workers at the school where he taught (“I guess my gaydar was wrong about you, Hannie.” “Mingyu, you’re going to get your ass beat-”); and a live-in babysitter named Minghao Xu (he was an infant nurse at a hospital in the area, but had left his job to help Jeonghan out. Minghao was an angel, really).For the time being, Jeonghan was perfectly happy in his ditch.





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

  * For [8style](https://archiveofourown.org/users/8style/gifts).



> hello! this story is a gift for my lovely friend sho! i hope you enjoy reading this as much as I've enjoyed writing it! i'll be adding part two very soon, so check back for that! i'm not sure how long this will end up being. it kinda depends on how invested i get in the characters lol. 
> 
> anyway, thank you for reading! enjoy :)
> 
> ~ cj

~

 

Metaphorically, Jeonghan’s life had taken a sharp curve into a ditch, and not made its way back out yet. The ditch wasn’t the worst part (it was shielded from the wind, and offered a soft, grassy area for him to rest), nor was the fact that he was still  _ in  _ said ditch (he was  _ planning  _ how to get out). 

 

No, the worst part was that, in that ditch, he had been confronted with a girl whom he’d had a drunken one-night stand with.

 

Not only that, but he was presented with a baby.  _ His  _ baby. 

 

~ 

 

In reality, none of the nonsense with the ditch happened, but it was a much easier way for Jeonghan to understand how he’d managed to get himself into this position. What really happened, was much more shocking, and Jeonghan swore he could still feel the effects of whiplash in his neck when he turned too quickly. 

 

What  _ really  _ happened, was that Jeonghan made a mistake, brought a child into this world, and now had to deal with the consequences of his mistakes. The consequences are as follows: a chubby two-month-old baby girl named Yeona (she looked just like Jeonghan did when he was a baby, and it was a little scary); a lot of teasing from his co-workers at the school where he taught (“I guess my gaydar was wrong about you, Hannie.” “Mingyu, you’re going to get your ass  _ beat _ -”); and a live-in babysitter named Minghao Xu (he was an infant nurse at a hospital in the area, but had left his job to help Jeonghan out. Minghao was an angel, really). 

 

For the time being, Jeonghan was perfectly happy in his ditch. 

 

~

 

Honestly, Jeonghan was probably at the best point in his life to raise a child: he had a steady income, a spare room since his best friend moved out, and more energy than he had in high school. However, Jeonghan learned very quickly that he had no one to care for the infant while he was at work- he hadn't even told his parents about Yeona yet, and they lived two hours away, and he had very few friends in the new area, let alone someone who was free all day every week day.

 

This is where Minghao came into his life. 

Mingyu was familiar with Minghao, saying that they had a few of the same classes in college since their majors were similar, and kept in touch with him after they graduated. He knew that Minghao lived and worked in the area, but was struggling to pay rent since he was hardly working any hours at the hospital. 

 

Jeonghan nearly burst into tears when Mingyu gave him Minghao’s phone number.

 

The following Saturday, Jeonghan was woken up by his daughter screeching in his ear at 7:48am. He was supposed to meet Minghao at a nearby restaurant at 9:00, so he sat up, collected his daughter into his arms, and went to the kitchen to make a bottle. 

 

Here’s the thing: Jeonghan knew next to nothing about kids. He knew that he had one, he practically still  _ was one,  _ and that they needed to be fed, changed, and soothed constantly. Really, he was just trying to copy what he saw mother’s doing with their children. Other than that, he was clueless. He taught 12th grade physics; he had no reason to be educated on infants. 

 

Yeona’s mother had been kind enough to include a diaper bag full of essentials (clothes, formula, diapers, wipes, etc.) and her carseat, but Jeonghan had no other baby supplies aside from that. Yeona had only been living with him for less than two weeks, though, so he cut himself some slack. He was grateful the baby was still  _ alive _ . 

 

Jeonghan balanced Yeona in the crook of his elbow, and supported her head with his hand as he shook the bottle. The baby balled her fists in his shirt and whined. “Shh, Yeona. I’ve only done this, like, a total of thirty times. I’m not an expert.” Jeonghan made his way over to the couch and turned on the television while he fed Yeona. 

 

The little girl sucked down the liquid so fast that Jeonghan was afraid she was going to choke. He tried to pull the bottle away to slow her down a little bit, but she resisted. He chuckled. 

 

“Definitely my daughter.”

 

~

 

Jeonghan was admittedly a bit nervous to meet Minghao. Just from how Mingyu described him, the boy seemed very put together and mature. Well, he didn’t actually say  _ that,  _ he said, “He’s just a normal, functioning adult, Jeonghan. He just had to grow up pretty quick after some family issues, and he’s very mature because of it.”

 

A normal, functioning adult. Jeonghan was convinced that Minghao was going to  _ laugh  _ when he saw him. 

~

 

To his surprise, Minghao  _ didn’t  _ burst into laughter at the sight of him. Instead, he gave Jeonghan a calm smile, and stretched out his hand while introducing himself. “I’m Minghao Xu. It’s nice to meet you. I’m assuming this is Yeona?” Jeonghan could see the affection in Minghao’s eyes as he gazed at the little girl sleeping in her carseat. It was very obvious that he was fond of children. Jeonghan had to stop himself from cooing.

 

“This is her. I’m Jeonghan Yoon, but I assume you knew that since you knew my daughter’s name.” Minghao chuckled a little, nodded, and took a seat across from Jeonghan. “Order anything you want; it’s on me.” he said, handing the other boy a menu. “Are you sure?” Minghao asked. His nose scrunched up a little bit, and Jeonghan kind of wanted to pinch his cheeks.

 

_ Oh, shit. He’s cute.  _

 

“Of course. I wouldn’t invite you to a restaurant and expect you not to eat.” Minghao chuckled at that, and Jeonghan  _ really  _ wanted to pinch his cheeks.

 

Minghao really did give off the vibe of maturity and trust, and Jeonghan decided then that he would make it his personal mission to make this experience as comfortable as possible for the boy. 

 

After they placed their orders, Minghao pulled a folder from the messenger bag he was carrying, and handed it over to Jeonghan. He must’ve had a confused look on his face because Minghao proceeded to explain with a smile, “There’s a resume with my past work experiences, some letters of recommendation from my employers, all the coursework I did during college, copies of all my training certificates, and a skills evaluation from my previous advisor at the hospital. I wasn’t sure how much Mingyu told you about me, but I just wanted to be sure you know I’m legit.” 

 

Oh, Minghao was  _ super  _ legit. Jeonghan felt like an underachiever compared to this kid, but he supposed that was a good thing in this situation. “Is everything okay?” Minghao kind of whispered his question. He sounded timid, and Jeonghan assumed he had been gaping at all the paperwork. 

 

“Hmm? Oh, yeah, everything’s fine! I just haven’t had this many documents in front of me since I applied for college.” Minghao laughed at that, nodding in agreement, and Jeonghan noticed that his laughter sounded similar to tinkling bells- sharp and high-pitched, but not at all offensive to the ears. It was a nice sound. 

 

Jeonghan glanced up to see Minghao smiling a little fondly at Yeona (Jeonghan was surprised she had stayed asleep this long). This was going to be an easy decision. 

 

“I really didn’t want this to be like a job interview, but I have to say this: tell me about yourself, Minghao.” 

 

And he did. In between bites of his omelette, Minghao talked about his family; his little sister was the main topic of conversation, and it was obvious that Minghao adored her. He explained that his parents were married for almost thirty years before his father got involved with another woman, which led to a nasty divorce. 

 

“When we moved to America, the transition was really difficult for my parents, and that’s what my dad always blamed it on. He says their marriage fell apart as soon as they started learning English. I was only thirteen and my sister was three, so she didn’t know what was going on. My mom became really distant with both of us, and kind of stopped taking care of my sister. I basically raised her for three years.” 

 

That was what encouraged Minghao to work with children. He graduated in the top five percent of his high school class, and went on to college to become an Infantile Nurse. Initially, Minghao wanted to work with Child Services, and become a counselor for underprivileged children, but he wouldn’t have been able to find work in the area. This was his hometown, and he wanted to stay nearby for his sister. 

 

“I decided to become an Infantile Nurse because I was still working with children, and I knew I would always have a job at the hospital. But because of the superiority rules at my workplace, employees who have been there longer get the first pick at the hours they want. I’ve been working three nights a week, and my manager refuses to change my hours because I’m still new. I’m barely managing to pay rent, and I’m hardly getting any rest.” 

 

Now that he mentioned it, Minghao did have some very dark circles around his eyes, and he moved in a way that looked tired- like his bones couldn’t keep up with his joints. Jeonghan rested his hand over Minghao’s, effectively halting whatever he was about to say. 

 

“How soon can you move in?”

 

~

Minghao was able to move in on the following Saturday after everything was settled with Jeonghan’s landlord.

 

Minghao learned quite a bit about Jeonghan when he was being given a tour of the older man’s apartment the day before he moved in. He noticed that Jeonghan looked a bit unsure when holding Yeona. Minghao almost laughed when the little girl began to wake up while they were in the elevator. 

 

“No, no, no. Yeona please, we’re almost home-” he whispered frantically. Jeonghan was practically juggling the crying baby in his arms, and Minghao rolled his eyes and decided to take action. “Give her here.” he said, holding out his arms. “W-What are you gonna do?” Jeonghan asked. There was a panicked look in his eyes, and Minghao smiled. “I’m going to calm her down. Watch.” 

 

With that, he took the baby from Jeonghan’s arms and expertly cradled her against his chest. He supported Yeona’s head in one palm, and kept the other secure on her bottom. Her cries came to a stuttering stop. Jeonghan was stunned.

 

“Babies respond really well to hearing a heartbeat and feeling someone breathe. Holding a baby against your chest mimics the feeling of the womb, which they naturally associate with comfort. It sounds a little strange, but it works, I promise.” Minghao explained, rocking Yeona gently back and forth until the elevator came to a halt. Jeonghan looked at him as if Minghao had just climbed Mount Everest while performing a handstand. This time, Minghao did laugh.

 

~

 

Jeonghan lived on the fifth floor, and had never seen the stairs that lead up to said floor. The front door squeaked open into the kitchen (which Minghao realized very quickly was hardly ever used properly, and made it his personal mission to cook  _ actual food  _ for Jeonghan and Yeona), and Minghao couldn’t help it when his eyes wandered curiously to Jeonghan, only to find the other already staring at him. 

 

“You can, um- you can hang your coat right there. Just leave your shoes here,” Jeonghan mumbled. “I can lay her down if you don’t wanna hold her?” It sounded like a question, but Jeonghan stretched out his arms for his daughter. Minghao handed her over carefully, and repositioned Jeonghan’s hands to make the baby more comfortable. “You’ll get the hang of it.” he said, smiling at Jeonghan. 

 

Once Yeona was asleep in the middle of Jeonghan’s bed (she was surrounded by pillows because Jeonghan was terrified she would fall off the bed), Jeonghan directed Minghao back to the front door to begin the tour. 

 

“So, this is the dining room and kitchen. I don’t spend a lot of time in here, but you’re more than welcome to. There’s the fridge, the oven and stove, and the sink. I don’t have a dishwasher because I didn’t need one when I moved in,” Jeonghan pointed around to the various appliances, and showed Minghao where the silverware and tableware was. The countertops were a dark granite, the appliances were all stainless steel, and the cabinets were all a sturdy red wood. The window overlooked the street below, and was adorned with hanging plants and cream-colored curtains tied away from the glass. Warm lighting cast shadows on the dining table, and the darkness outside was much more daunting now that Minghao could clearly see the dips and curves of Jeonghan’s profile. 

 

Next, Jeonghan led them down a long hallway and flicked a light switch on the wall, illuminating the dark space. Minghao looked around and saw the walls were the same cream color as the curtains in the kitchen. Lamps hung high on the walls instead of ceiling lights, and Minghao appreciated the simplistic elegance of it all. It seemed that the doors were all the same wood as the cabinets as well. 

 

Jeonghan opened a door on the left, and stepped out of the way to let Minghao enter first. “This is the spare room that my former roommate and I turned into a study space. I hardly ever come in here now. I figure I’ll turn it into Yeona’s room soon since she’ll be staying here for awhile.” Jeonghan smiled, and Minghao couldn’t keep the smile from reflecting in his features. Jeonghan was just an infectious person. 

 

The “study space” as Jeonghan called it, had a paper covered coffee-table pressed flush against the far wall with an enormous body pillow functioning as a chair. A bookshelf stood next to the set up, but other than that, the room was bare. 

 

The next room on the left side of the hallway was Jeonghan’s bedroom. It was simple, but felt lived-in. The queen size bed was situated against the same wall as the door, and had a fluffy white duvet spread across it with four pastel blue accent pillows, and one that was shaped like a cloud. The nightstands on either side of the bed had the same wood finish as the doors and cabinets, and Minghao really appreciated Jeonghan’s eye for detail. 

 

A large bookshelf sat in the corner of the room next to a very comfortable looking gray chair with a blue blanket draped over the back. The bookshelf held a couple of knick-knacks, and a few photos of who Minghao assumed to be Jeonghan’s family. A flat-screen T.V. hung on the wall opposite the bed, and another door led to what Minghao guessed was the master bathroom from the looks of it. 

 

“This is my bedroom. Even though it is technically  _ my space _ , you're more than welcome to it. All I ask is that you clean up after yourself.” Jeonghan was still smiling, and Minghao really enjoyed looking at him. There was something about Jeonghan that made Minghao think he would be perfectly fine with spending hours just staring at the older boy.

 

“In there is the master bathroom,” Minghao was right! “There's extra towels, soap, and other stuff in there. I mostly use that bathroom, but you have one to yourself, so we shouldn't get in each other's way too much.” Jeonghan pointed through the open door, and Minghao saw that there was a small hallway connecting the two rooms, and a door leading back out to the main hallway. The layout of this apartment was different than any Minghao had seen before. 

 

The master bathroom had gray tiled floors, baby blue walls, and spotless white cabinets and porcelain accessories. “Jeonghan, where do you even keep all of your things? This looks like a hotel bathroom.” Minghao asked. The bathroom was impeccably clean, and Minghao figured that if he wiped the top of a cabinet with white gloves, he would find no dust stuck to his hands. 

 

“In the cabinets, silly. Storing things out of sight makes everything look cleaner. My cabinets are a wreck though.” Jeonghan laughed, and Minghao found himself smiling at him again. Living here may be easier than Minghao expected.

 

~

 

Across from the door to Jeonghan’s bedroom was another smaller hallway that had a door on each side. The door on the left side was the guest bathroom. It was a bit smaller than the master bathroom, but still just as well-furnished and clean overall. 

 

“You have free reign of this bathroom. I won’t come in here without asking, and I won’t steal any of your stuff, I promise.” Jeonghan slapped his right hand over his heart with that sentiment, and Minghao found himself laughing at the older man’s antics. Jeonghan was smiling in that dazzlingly bright way that he did, and Minghao could feel heat rising in his cheeks. 

 

Jeonghan flicked off the bathroom light, and opened the door across the narrow hallway. “And this is your bedroom.” If it had been anyone else’s house, Minghao would’ve expected a bare room with shotty carpet and stained walls. But, thankfully, this was Jeonghan’s home, and the room was already fully furnished and ready to be occupied. 

 

It was smaller than Jeonghan’s bedroom, but Minghao didn’t mind. A queen size bed was pressed up against the wall opposite the door, and had a duvet and two nightstands that were identical to Jeonghan’s. The only contrast was the crimson and black throw pillows, and a matching red blanket sprawled across the foot of the bed. A small closet and a bookshelf took up one wall, while another flat-screen T.V. sat on a stand across from the bed. Minghao was in awe. 

 

“Do you like it? I-It’s completely fine if you don’t, and you can decorate it however you want. I just didn’t want you to come home to an empty room until you got all your things unpacked.” Minghao turned around to face Jeonghan, and found him shuffling his feet nervously, and running a hand up and down his arm. Minghao took the hand in his own in what he hoped was a comforting gesture. 

 

“It’s  _ perfect _ , Jeonghan. Thank you so much for doing all of this. I really, really appreciate it.” A smile returned to Jeonghan’s face, and Minghao squeezed his hand in reassurance. 

 

Minghao decided then that  _ that  _ was the expression that belonged on Jeonghan’s face: happiness. 

 

~

 

The living room looked as Minghao expected it to: clean, simple, and bright. Natural lighting flowed in between the leaves of plants hanging in the window, and the whole room smelled of flowers. Now that Minghao thought about it, the entire apartment smelled slightly of flowers. It was a gentle scent that Minghao could become easily accustomed to. 

 

The windowsill was heavily padded with what looked like very soft fabric. There was a messily folded blanket in the corner, and a book sat open on top of it as if someone had gotten up to answer the door or pull food out of the oven. There was a couch and loveseat situated in the corner by the window that looked  _ ancient _ , and the coffee table looked just as old, but had more than likely been refurbished. Four tall bookshelves (all full) stood side by side on the opposite wall, and a large flat-screen hung on the wall facing the seating area.

 

There were a few framed photos scattered along the bookshelves, and Minghao took note of a few new faces. There was one in front of what looked like a school building, and three people stood in front. Minghao recognized Jeonghan immediately- a dark curtain of hair framed his slightly chubbier face, and he wrapped one arm around a very tall man who was probably around Minghao’s age while the other hand held up a set of keys. The taller man held up a matching set of keys and they both smiled widely. The third man stood to the side with his arms crossed and a dramatic pout set across his features. 

 

Minghao turned to ask Jeonghan who the other two men were, but found the older was already looking towards him. He had done that a few times now- caught Jeonghan looking at him, that is. Jeonghan didn’t seem shy about his staring habit, though, so Minghao said nothing about it. 

 

“Who are they? You guys look close.” Minghao asked, pointing to the picture. Jeonghan smiled fondly. “That’s Mingyu and Jun, two of my best friends from college. This picture was taken outside of the first school Mingyu and I interned at. Jun wasn’t able to match his schedule to do internships at the same time as us, and he was a little grumpy about it. Mingyu and I actually teach at the same school now. Jun moved a couple towns over when he was offered a job, but I still talk to him pretty often.” 

 

Minghao had already met Joshua, who lived across the hall and had been babysitting Yeona for the past week while Jeonghan was at work. Now that he’d seen Jun and Mingyu, he was more than a little intimidated by how many ungodly attractive friends Jeonghan had. He understood that beautiful people typically traveled in packs, but this was just unfair. 

 

And he must have said that out loud because Jeonghan asked, “What’s unfair?” just a moment after he thought (spoke) it. Minghao chuckled nervously. Oh, how he wanted the earth to swallow him whole. 

 

“What?” he asked. His voice was a little higher-pitched than usual- a telltale sign that he was embarrassed. “You said, ‘This is just unfair’ but I couldn’t hear what you said before that. What’s unfair?” Jeonghan was smiling devilishly, and Minghao had a feeling he knew  _ exactly  _ what he said, and just wanted to hear him say it again. 

 

At that moment, Yeona began to wail, and Minghao practically ran out of the room. 

 

~

 

“Why don’t you just stay the night here? It’s late, and I don’t want you taking the bus home at this time of night,” Jeonghan was watching intently as Minghao fed and rocked Yeona. Minghao had informed him earlier that babies didn’t know the difference between day and night, and still needed to be fed when the rest of the world was asleep. Jeonghan felt terrible knowing that was the reason the little girl cried all night long. 

 

Minghao smiled, but didn’t remove his gaze from Yeona- she was looking up at him curiously as she sucked on the bottle, and Minghao was pretty sure he was already in love with this baby. It was hard not to love Yeona when she was just as beautiful as her father: big, chocolate brown eyes, fluttering lashes, a small, round nose, and a thin layer of dark hair covering her head. She was an adorable baby, and Minghao had seen a lot of babies in his life. Yeona was by far the cutest. 

 

“I appreciate that, Jeonghan, but it’s okay. I’ve taken the bus home later than this plenty of times.” Minghao whispered. Yeona was drifting back to sleep in his arms. He saw something that looked like panic flash across Jeonghan’s features. “Can you please stay here?” Jeonghan asked a little desperately. He took a seat beside Minghao on the end of the bed, turning towards him. 

 

“I don’t really want to spend another night without you here for Yeona’s sake.” A smile spread across Jeonghan’s face, and Minghao matched it. How could he say no to that? 

 

“Okay. But you’ll have to lend me some clothes to sleep in.”

 

~

 

Once Yeona was comfortably asleep in her pillow fortress, Minghao and Jeonghan left her alone. “You’ll have to get some more permanent stuff for her soon.” Minghao mumbled, carefully shutting the door. Jeonghan sighed. “I’ll also need a second job to support her and pay you.” The older boy laughed humorlessly. 

 

Minghao stopped stiff in the dark hallway. “What?” he meant it as a question, but it sounded more like a statement. Jeonghan turned to face him. “Jeonghan, there is no way you’re paying me. I won’t let you.” 

 

Now it was Jeonghan’s turn to be confused. He cocked an eyebrow at the younger. “What are you talking about? Of course I’m paying you. I didn’t expect you to do all of this for me for free.” Minghao almost laughed at how clueless Jeonghan was. 

  
  


“Jeonghan,  _ no.  _ If it wasn’t for you, I would’ve been evicted from my apartment within the next two weeks, working a shitty job, and proving my dad right when he said I couldn’t make it on my own in America,” Jeonghan looked a little bit like he was going to cry, and Minghao knew he needed to prevent that. He reached out to Jeonghan until his palm met the other’s shoulder. Minghao slid his hand slowly over the exposed skin of Jeonghan’s forearm until their fingertips found each other. Minghao was sure he felt Jeonghan shiver under his touch. 

 

“You’ve helped me,” Minghao laced their fingers together, glided his thumb over the back of Jeonghan’s hand. “Now let me help you.” 

 

Jeonghan melted into Minghao’s chest and circled his arms around his lithe waist. He heard a small, “oof” from where his forehead rested against Minghao’s neck, and began to pull away, afraid he’d hurt the other boy. But Minghao held him there, one hand at the small of his back, the other gently combing through his dark hair. 

 

It was tender, the way they held each other- not fleeting the way most hugs shared between friends were. Minghao was content to stay in this position for as long as Jeonghan allowed him to. He could only hope that he was overstepping any unspoken boundaries. 

 

Minghao buried his nose in the crown of Jeonghan’s hair and breathed in. He smelled like fresh air, springtime, a cloudless night somewhere unknown with stars shining brightly above their heads. 

 

Jeonghan reminded Minghao of everything  _ clean _ , everything  _ good _ , and everything  _ new _ .

 

Minghao planted the softest kiss into Jeonghan’s hair, and held his lips there for a moment before Jeonghan spoke. 

 

“C’mon. I have some clothes you can borrow.”

 

~ 

 

Jeonghan felt as if he had just curled up next to Yeona when her cries rung out through the apartment. Jeonghan jolted awake, hands quick to turn on the bedside lamp, and his bedroom door opened slowly. He smiled softly at a very sleepy Minghao as the boy made his way over to the bed and scooped up the baby. 

 

Jeonghan assumed that Minghao could take care of a baby blind. Minghao smiled down at him, whispered “hey,” and held Yeona against his chest, quietly shushing her. 

 

“Come with me,” Minghao called over his shoulder. “We’re going to take turns during the night, so you need to know what to do, too.” Jeonghan followed after the younger boy, and heard him mumbling, “Your daddy will learn how to take care of you one of these days, Yeonie.”

 

_ Yeonie.  _

 

Jeonghan’s heart was going to explode.

 

Minghao stepped into the kitchen, and appeared to know where everything was. “Grab the can of formula and a bottle out of her diaper bag.” Jeonghan hadn’t taken any of Yeona’s things out of her diaper bag yet, but he was grateful her mother decided to include all of the essentials. 

 

“Let me show you something,” Minghao said, flicking on the stove light. He handed the baby over to Jeonghan, and placed the can of formula on the counter. “This,” Minghao pointed to a line on the scoop. “is where you need to fill it to. This,” he pointed to the next line up. “is where you’ve been filling it to. If it’s too thick, she’ll have a hard time drinking it. That’s why the nipples of her bottles are clogged.” 

 

Jeonghan quietly “ooh”ed, and nodded. Minghao explained a couple other things (that you had to support a baby’s neck constantly or it would break; that children suffocate  _ very  _ easily, and other things that scared the hell out of Jeonghan) while he filled and shook the bottle. 

 

He and Jeonghan retreated back to the older’s bedroom, where Minghao took the baby from his arms, instructed him to sit with his back against the headboard, and propped a pillow in the crook of his elbow. 

 

“That’ll support her better than your arm, and she’ll have a better angle to swallow at.” he explained, carefully settling Yeona onto the pillow. The girl’s cries had turned to small whimpers and her eyes grew wide the moment she saw the bottle. Minghao laughed, and caressed the top of her head as Jeonghan fed her. 

 

Yeona was a fast eater, and Jeonghan felt horrible for feeding her the wrong way. Not only was this position more comfortable, but it was more efficient for Yeona - and apparently for her digestive system, too. He had no idea that babies were so specific about these kinds of things.

 

Yeona sucked down the liquid in less than ten minutes, and seemed placated. Jeonghan looked up at Minghao expectantly. “What now?” he asked. Minghao groaned. 

 

“Have you never burped her after you fed her?” Minghao asked. He sounded much more exhausted now. “No..” Jeonghan’s voice faded after he saw Minghao's disappointed expression.

 

“Oh, my god,” Minghao promptly took the baby from Jeonghan. “I’ll show you how to do this  _ once,  _ and after that, you better not forget to burp her. I’m surprised she hasn’t combusted yet.” 

 

That was a horrifying visual, and Jeonghan hated his brain for conjuring it. 

 

“Why? Does it hurt her if she doesn’t burp?” he questioned. Minghao sat Yeona on his shoulder, and began to bounce her and pat on the center of her back. “Just as much as it hurts you when you have indigestion. Babies aren’t able to expel gas on their own for a few months, so they need to be burped after every feeding.” 

 

Jeonghan wanted to vomit. His little girl had been in pain, and he didn’t know how to do the simplest thing to stop it. He felt awful, and Minghao saw his change in demeanor. 

 

“Hey, it’s okay. This is a common mistake for first-time parents, and it won’t effect Yeona in the long run. She’s okay, Jeonghan.” 

 

At that moment, Yeona let out the loudest burp Jeonghan had ever heard from a two-month-old baby, and he and Minghao both laughed. 

 

Yeah, they could do this.

 

~ 

  
  
  
  



	2. Part Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again! this part is a bit shorter than the first, but i really wanted to get something out for sho! hopefully part three will make up for it :)
> 
> enjoy! 
> 
> ~ cj

Yeona woke twice more before 8:00am rolled around, and Jeonghan cursed his alarm clock for waking his daughter. Yeona didn't cry, but let out a few little whimpers instead that had Jeonghan instantly cooing at her. 

 

“I know it's loud, princess,” he sighed, lifting the baby into his arms and smiling down at her. “Hopefully you won't be able to hear it once we get your room all fixed up. How does that sound, Yeonie?” 

 

Of course, she didn't answer, but Jeonghan thought he saw the corner of her mouth quirk up a bit. He took that as a good sign, and kissed the top of her head. 

 

“Let's go wake up Minghao, baby.” 

 

~

 

Minghao was a god-send.

The moment Jeonghan left his bedroom, the smell of eggs, pancakes, and bacon filled his nostrils. Minghao stood over the stove, carefully flipping a pancake, and filling a plate with scrambled eggs. Jeonghan had to stop himself from wrapping his arms around his waist from behind him. 

 

Yeona perked up a bit, and let out a little screech when she spotted Minghao. He and Jeonghan both jumped, and Minghao turned to smile at them both. 

 

“Good morning, princess!” Minghao called excitedly, and reached out for Yeona. Jeonghan only swooned a little bit. Just a little.

 

“Good morning to you, too, Minghao.” Jeonghan said sarcastically, handing his daughter over. Minghao laughed at that, and replied, “I can call you princess, too, if you’d like.” 

 

Minghao was  _ way  _ too close to him, and Jeonghan’s cheeks were aflame  _ much  _ faster than he expected. It wasn’t until then did Jeonghan realize that Minghao was a few inches taller than him. Minghao glided his tongue over his bottom lip, and Jeonghan really wished he had the self-control to  _ not  _ watch the movement.  

 

“No thanks. I’m good.” was Jeonghan’s intelligent response. 

 

And Minghao was back to smiling brightly as he turned around and began explaining all the food to Yeona while Jeonghan prepared her bottle. 

 

“And these are pancakes! Your daddy actually had the ingredients to make pancakes; can you believe that, Yeonie? They don’t have much taste unless you put toppings on them. I promise I’ll make you some as soon as you grow some teeth, princess.” 

 

Jeonghan was shaking the bottle much harder than he intended to.

 

“Jeonghan, what all do you want to eat?” Minghao asked, bouncing Yeona lightly on his shoulder. Jeonghan assumed he was trying to keep her awake long enough to eat. “Anything is fine,” he replied. “Did you go to the store this morning?” 

 

Minghao laughed as he plated the food. “No, I just made what we had the ingredients for. Is that okay?” Minghao sounded self-conscious, and now Jeonghan  _ really  _ had to suppress the urge to hug him. 

 

“Of course! Honestly, I didn’t even know I had all this stuff.” Minghao smiled at that, and Jeonghan saw the tension fade from his shoulders. He handed Yeona and the bottle over to Jeonghan after instructing him to sit at the table while he brought the food over. 

 

“You feed her now, and I’ll change her afterwards.” he stated, adjusting the baby in Jeonghan’s arms. She was getting impatient, and Minghao took one of her fists into his hand and blew kisses onto her palm. 

 

Jeonghan wouldn’t have been able to stop the smile from spreading to his cheeks if he tried. A laugh bubbled in his throat when he heard Yeona release a screech of joy, and Minghao grinned widely at the baby. 

 

Yeona was almost three months old, but she emoted more than any baby Jeonghan had ever seen. Granted, he hadn’t spent time with many babies. Still, he assumed it was a good thing that his daughter expressed her feelings well at such a young age. 

 

~

 

Minghao was looking at him again. Jeonghan looked up from staring wantingly at his plate of food to find Minghao staring back at him with a smirk. Wordlessly, Minghao reached across the table and picked up a bite of egg with his fork. And held it up to Jeonghan.

 

“Eat,” he insisted. “I can’t sit here and eat while you stare at your plate with both hands occupied.” Minghao was right, both of his hands were occupied, and he was staring at his plate because he was hungry. But he wasn’t a  _ baby.  _

 

“It’s fine. I’ll eat once she’s finished.” 

 

“They you’ll have to burp her, and I’ll have to change her, and one of us will still be holding her, and by then your food will be cold.” 

 

“So, we’ll reheat it.” 

 

“That’s something a person who has never had reheated pancakes would say.”

 

Well, Minghao had him there. Jeonghan hadn’t noticed, but with every response to his protests, the fork was slowly getting closer to his face. It was barely three inches from his nose, and it was still  _ warm.  _

 

Jeonghan gave in. 

 

Minghao smiled when he took the fork into his mouth, and Jeonghan felt like a  _ baby _ , but it was okay because Minghao was smiling, and his cheeks were flushed, and that alone made Jeonghan’s day.

 

Minghao continued to feed him bites of food, giving him sips of orange juice in between every few bites. It seemed practiced, methodical in a way, and Jeonghan was curious. 

 

“Why are you so good at this?” he asked. Minghao paused his task of cutting the pancake into smaller pieces, and looked up. “What? Feeding you?” Minghao looked a little smug and Jeonghan wanted to kiss his cheeks a little. He nodded instead.

 

“My first job was at a nursing home,” Minghao directed the pancake into Jeonghan’s mouth. “Elderly people are surprisingly similar to babies in a lot of ways. The have to be fed, bathed frequently, and changed if they’re incontinent.” 

 

“If-com-timent?” Jeonghan attempted to ask, mouth full of pancake. Minghao was determined to get him to finish his breakfast. He smiled. “It means they don’t have control of their bladder or bowels. A lot of people in nursing homes wear adult diapers, and they have to be changed about as often as babies. I could tell you some  _ crazy  _ stories about my time in the nursing home.” 

 

Minghao’s eyes widened dramatically, and Jeonghan laughed, bits of pancake flying from his mouth. Minghao brought a napkin up to his lips. “There was one resident I took care of- Dorothy was her name. Very sweet lady, but she liked to steal food and hide it in her room. Everyday when I went in to change her sheets, I would find butterscotch candy tucked between the sheet and the mattress. I swear, that’s why her back always hurt,” Minghao paused, watching Jeonghan’s eyes widen. He held up a finger. 

 

“It gets better,” he began again. “One day after breakfast, she was rolling around the dining room talking to other residents, and I saw her take a banana off someone’s plate. When I confronted her about it a few minutes later, it was nowhere in sight, and I knew she didn’t eat it. I asked her what she did with it, and she said, ‘Oh, you don’t wanna know, HaoHao’- that’s what a lot of the residents called me,” 

 

Minghao paused again, stifling his laughter. Jeonghan thought it to be very endearing that Minghao was so concerned about  _ one banana.  _

 

“I told her that I  _ did  _ want to know, and she glanced around to see if anyone was watching. She stuck her hand down her shirt and pulled a banana, an orange, a pair of glasses, and three butterscotch candies  _ out of her bra _ .”  Minghao doubled over the table in laughter, dropping the fork onto his plate, and Jeonghan was content to watch him wallow with joy. 

 

Jeonghan chuckled, and looked down to see his daughter still sucking dutifully on her bottle, completely oblivious to the laughter around her. 

 

“Oh, god. I’m so glad I don’t work at a nursing home anymore.” Minghao wiped a few tears from the corner of his eyes, and smiled at Jeonghan. “Are you full?” he asked, motioning towards the empty plate. Jeonghan didn’t even noticed he’d eaten that much. 

 

He nodded, returning Minghao’s bright smile, and Yeona let go of the bottle. 

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did you think? let me know in the comments! i love to hear from everyone :) 
> 
> also, the story minghao told is something that actually happened to me during my time working in a nursing home last year! nursing homes are crazy dude
> 
> most facts involving the medical field will be pretty accurate because of my knowledge in that area, but please let me know if i make a mistake! 
> 
> thank you for reading! ily :)
> 
> ~ cj
> 
> twitter/curiouscat: gyuquartz


	3. Part Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again! i apologize for updating at such random times, but i write whenever i have a chance to, and i really don't follow any schedule :( 
> 
> anyway, here's part three! we learn a bit more about jeonghan's thoughts in this one :) let me know what you think! comments are always appreciated, and i love hearing your opinions!
> 
> enjoy! ily :)
> 
> ~ cj
> 
> twt/cc: @gyuquartz

“So, I was thinking that today we could go get some stuff for Yeona’s room since we don’t have anyone to watch her until tomorrow. If you're up for it, that is.” Minghao was busy changing Yeona’s diaper on the sofa (“On the  _ sofa? Really?” _ “Yes, Jeonghan. I don't want her to throw her head back against the floor.”) while Jeonghan was busy cleaning up the kitchen.

 

“That's fine with me,” he replied, putting away the clean dishes. Their neighbor, ( _ Their  _ neighbor!) Joshua had volunteered to babysit Yeona anytime neither Jeonghan or Minghao were home. Joshua also kept Jeonghan sane the first few nights Yeona was with him, but that’s not important. 

 

“I got paid last week, and Yeona’s mom left some money in her diaper bag, so we should be okay.” 

 

“Are you sure?” Jeonghan heard the cap of something  _ pop,  _ and saw Minghao looked up at him with furrowed brows. “I can pay for lunch or whatever, if you want.”

 

_ No. Absolutely not. That's too domestic.  _

 

“We can pay for our own, that way neither of us feels bad,” Jeonghan decided to use the same strategy as he did when he went on dates in college. He really hated spending money, but his daughter couldn't sleep in his bed forever. 

 

“While we're out, I want to open an account for you at my bank. It'll be easier for us to transfer money that way.” 

 

_ Too domestic.  _

 

_ “ _ Sounds good,” Minghao hoisted Yeona into his arms. “Do you want to go soon? You can shower first if you want to.” Jeonghan wanted to be polite and tell the younger boy he could shower first, but Yeona looked so comfortable and content in his arms. So, he nodded and headed towards the bathroom. 

 

~

  
  


One of Jeonghan’s major concerns with having a live-in babysitter was that Yeona would become more attached to the babysitter than to him. That, and she might have separation issues when the person inevitably left. No, he was  _ certain _ Yeona would have issues when Minghao left.

 

_ Jeonghan  _ would have issues when Minghao left. For whatever reason, when Jeonghan imagined his and Yeona’s future, Minghao was there, too. When he thought of Yeona taking her first steps, saying her first words, getting her first haircut, going to school for the first time- Minghao was present when he imagined  _ all  _ her firsts.

 

Sometimes he was smiling quietly off to the side. Sometimes, he was holding Yeona’s chubby hand in his own, leading her somewhere, or helping her walk. Other times, he had one arm wrapped around Jeonghan’s waist, the other holding a camera, and was placing a soft kiss on Jeonghan’s cheek. That scared him the most.

 

The kid wasn’t even moved in yet, and Jeonghan was already attached to him! How would his  _ daughter  _ feel if the person who practically raised her suddenly left? 

 

A firm knock on the bathroom door tore Jeonghan out of his daily shower crisis. Seriously, he needed to learn how to shower like a normal person.

 

“Jeonghan, I don’t mean to rush you, but I really have to pee, and I refuse to do so with your daughter attached to my arm.” 

 

Attached. Jeonghan couldn’t get attached. 

 

~

 

After struggling to get Yeona safely strapped into her carseat for a solid fifteen minutes (“I’m a nurse! They don’t teach you how to do all this ‘parenting’ shit!”), Jeonghan flopped into the driver’s seat with an exaggerated sigh. Coincidently, Minghao did the same thing. 

 

“Okay,” Minghao groaned. “So, I googled places to buy baby things while you were in the shower, and that department store on Bridge Street is closing down their baby section, so they’re having sales. I also downloaded a couple online coupons for the things that aren’t on sale- diapers, baby silverware and stuff.” 

 

Jeonghan pulled the car out of the underground garage, heading towards the department store. He glanced over at Minghao when they came to a red light. “I thought you said they  _ didn’t  _ teach you ‘parenting shit’?” His face probably looked smug, but Minghao’s reaction was worth it. His face scrunched up, his cheeks puffed, and his mouth opened and closed helplessly. 

 

It was probably one of the most adorable things Jeonghan had ever seen.

 

“This- this is just common sense! Any normal, functioning person looks up coupons before they go shopping!” he defended. Jeonghan shrugged.

 

“So, I’m not a normal, functioning person?” 

 

“When it comes to looking up coupons and being a smart shopper, apparently not.”

 

Minghao was very obviously pouting. His arms were crossed over his chest, and his bottom lip jutted out slightly. Correction:  _ this  _ was the most adorable thing Jeonghan had ever seen. 

 

“Stop that. You’re distracting me.”

 

“Stop what?” Minghao asked. His pout remained. 

 

“Stop pouting and being all cute. You’re distracting me from watching the road.” 

 

Jeonghan didn’t need to be looking at Minghao to know that his expression changed after that. 

 

“So, you think I’m cute huh?” Jeonghan had made a tragic mistake. From the corner of his eye, he saw Minghao sweep the front of his hair up through his fingers.  _ Oh, lord. _

 

“Y-yeah. Yes. You’re just a kid; of course I think you’re cute.” 

 

“Jeonghan, did I tell you that I had two jobs after I graduated college?”

 

“No?” They were nearing the department store, and Jeonghan really wished Minghao would save this story for some other time when the air surrounding them didn’t feel suffocating. But, he persisted. 

 

“You know that little gay bar on the other side of town? The one with the benches lined with neon lights?” Jeonghan  _ did  _ know that bar, very well actually. It was one of the only bars he frequented during college, but he had forgotten about its existence completely until now. 

 

“Yes? Why?” Jeonghan had a bad feeling about this. Minghao had a tendency to be very blunt when telling stories, according to Mingyu. Just knowing that made Jeonghan nervous. 

 

“I was a stripper there for about six months right after college.”

 

Jeonghan nearly wrecked the damn car. If he was drinking something, he would’ve spit it out. If he was eating, he would’ve choked. If they weren’t pulling into the parking lot of the department store, he would’ve pulled the car over just to make sure Minghao was serious. 

 

Jeonghan put the car in park, and turned so he was completely facing Minghao, who just stared back at him. He looked confident, cocky even, but also a little like he was on the edge of bursting into tears. Or laughter. One of those things. 

 

Jeonghan knew he was lying. 

 

“No you absolutely did not, you little prick.”

 

It was laughter that Minghao was holding back. The younger boy beat his fists into the dashboard and cackled with all his might. Jeonghan was pretty sure he probably scared away every bird within a two mile radius, but he didn't care. 

 

He didn’t care because Minghao was happy, and he was becoming fond of this happy boy very quickly.

 

~

 

“So, first order of business: furniture. Do you know what you need?” Jeonghan was fiddling with the blanket Minghao had placed over Yeona in her carseat, and didn’t raise his head to respond. “I have no clue. That’s why you’re here.” Minghao huffed and led them towards the back of the store where Jeonghan saw a sign that read “ **BABY** ” in bold letters.

 

“Do you have any idea what color scheme you want to go with?” Minghao asked when they were en route to the “ **BABY** ” sign. “I don’t have any concrete ideas. I want it to be kinda neutral, though. White with pastels, if that’s possible. I don’t want it to be  _ too  _ colorful.”

 

“That’ll be great! Babies respond well to neutral-colored environments; it doesn’t overwhelm their senses as much.” Jeonghan really thought that Minghao made up random baby facts to assure him that he was doing an okay job of being a dad. But they all sounded so  _ convincing.  _

 

“Okay, so first, let’s find a crib, a rocking chair or recliner, and a dresser. Does her room have a closet? I can’t remember.” Minghao was looking through some sort of list on his phone, but Jeonghan couldn’t make out any of the words.

 

“Yes, but it’s not very big.”

 

“That’s okay. The dresser will work for storing clothes, and then her changing table can be on top.” 

 

“Could we use that table that’s already in there?” 

 

Minghao stopped in the aisle, and turned around very slowly. 

 

“Jeonghan,” he began. His voice held what seemed like mock-sympathy. “I hate to be the one to tell you this, but that table has seen better days.” Jeonghan gasped dramatically in reply. 

 

“Fine. What’re we gonna do with it then?” 

 

“We could get rid of it?” 

 

“That’s fine with me.” 

 

~

 

A crib was easy to find with Minghao’s help. They ended up picking a white crib that included the mattress, and could be easily assembled. Minghao suggested white sheets since they were easier to wash, and Jeonghan agreed, but was thoroughly confused when the topic of blankets came up. 

 

“Babies don’t use blankets when they sleep- they could suffocate. We’ve been over this, Jeonghan.”

 

Next, was the dresser. There were hardly any to pick from since the sales were going on, but Minghao managed to find a small one that matched the crib, and could also function as a changing table. 

 

“So, how will that work? The changing table thing, I mean.” 

 

“Here, look.” Minghao pulled the shopping cart towards the end of the aisle that held what he said were changing pads, and sheets for them. “So, you’ll lay Yeona down in this, and her diapers and stuff will be in the top drawer of the dresser. We can put a little trash can beside it, too.”

 

Minghao made everything sound so  _ easy _ , but Jeonghan was about to explode with nerves. He’d had trouble keeping himself taken care of for the past six years, but now he was expected to care of a child as well. The whole idea was understandably daunting, but Jeonghan wasn’t sure how to explain the feeling to Minghao. 

 

Minghao had been around babies forever; had been a normal, functioning member of society before he met Jeonghan, and had his entire life ahead of him. What was he doing helping Jeonghan raise his daughter? 

 

“These ones are a little thicker, but- Jeonghan?” 

 

Jeonghan looked up at the mention of his name. Minghao’s face was contorted into what looked like concern. Jeonghan didn’t like it. 

 

“Hey, are you okay? You’re crying.” Minghao approached him slowly, hands hovering as if he didn’t know what to do with them. Jeonghan hadn’t even felt the tears escape his eyes. 

 

“Jeonghan, talk to me.” Minghao’s hands came to rest on Jeonghan’s wrists, fingers circling around them. His hands slid slowly up and down his bare arms, causing goosebumps to rise in their tracks, and it felt familiar. Minghao’s hands were big and warm, and so easily smoothed against Jeonghan’s skin, and he felt a bit better. Or a bit more confident. One of those things. 

 

He assumed it was the latter, because he pulled Minghao into a tight hug, arms resting at his hips, face buried in his shoulder as he let a few more tears escape. Minghao smelled relatively the same, but more like his home this time.  _ Their  _ home. 

 

“Thank you so much,” Jeonghan choked out. Minghao made circles at the small of his back, and carded his fingers through the short hair at the back of Jeonghan’s neck. He laughed, and Jeonghan felt it rumble in his chest. 

 

“What are you thanking me for, silly?” Minghao’s voice was softer than usual; gentler, as if he was coaxing Jeonghan to sleep. Jeonghan had a passing thought that Minghao probably had a lovely singing voice. 

 

He wasn’t really sure why he was thanking Minghao. Because he would be lost without him there. Because he was scared to death that he was going to mess up his daughter’s life. Because Minghao could be anywhere else in the world right now, but he was there, holding Jeonghan in the middle of an aisle of a department store, shopping for changing pads. 

 

Minghao was there, and that’s all that mattered at the moment. 

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	4. Part Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again! i hope you're doing well! enjoy this chapter :) minghao will officially move in in the next chapter! i'm trying my best to get this story moving a little faster lol.
> 
> enjoy! ily :)
> 
> ~ cj

Jeonghan should’ve known that assembling a crib would be much harder than anticipated. But Minghao advised him not to purchase a pre assembled one simply for convenience (“But it would be so much easier!” “You think that now, but you’d be pissed when this thing didn’t fit through any doors.”), so he caved in and listened to the younger boy despite his brain protesting. 

 

And that’s how they ended up sitting on the floor in Yeona’s soon-to-be bedroom, flipping through the instruction manuals, trying to figure out where to start. 

 

“We have to start with the frame, Jeonghan,” Minghao said, pointing a finger to the section in Mandarin. “This version explains it a little better than the English one.” Jeonghan huffed. “Can you read it to me, then?” “Read it to you?” Minghao asked. Jeonghan smiled when the boy’s eyebrows disappeared under his bangs. 

“Yes, read it to me. And then you can translate it. I can read you the Korean one too, if you’d like. It says pretty much the same thing as the English one, though.” Minghao took two big breaths before nodding. “I’m sorry if I stutter,” he muttered. “It’s been awhile since I’ve read to someone in Mandarin.” And Minghao began to read. 

 

Jeonghan had no idea what he was saying, could hardly make out all the sounds rolling off Minghao’s tongue, but he knew that it sounded  _ natural.  _ It was rough and and a bit slurred, but it sounded comfortable coming from Minghao. His voice sounded deeper in his chest, his sounds were clipped by his tongue hitting the back of his teeth, and Jeonghan could listen to him speak Mandarin  _ all day. _

 

“Jeonghan,” Minghao called, breaking him out of his stupor. “Are you okay? You look kinda red.” Minghao laid a hand on his forehead, and that probably didn’t help the flush rising up Jeonghan’s neck. Minghao’s hand made its way to Jeonghan’s cheek, and continued to the side of his neck, holding him there. “You’re a little warm, but you don’t have a fever. Do you want something to drink?” Jeonghan hadn’t noticed that he’d just been staring at Minghao this whole time, not confirming or denying his questions. 

 

“No, no, I’m okay! I’m good! I just-” he struggled to find the right words to explain how he was feeling. “Your voice just sounds really… pretty when you speak Mandarin.” 

 

Shock, amusement, and joy all flashed across Minghao’s features in a matter of seconds. Jeonghan hardly had time to take in his wide eyes, the scrunch of his nose, and his shining smile before Yeona’s cries interrupted them. 

 

“Thank you, Jeonghan. No one had ever said that to me before.” Now, a flush was beginning to color Minghao’s cheeks and the butterflies in Jeonghan’s stomach unfolded their wings. 

 

After Minghao left to tend to Yeona, Jeonghan reminded himself of the deal he made with his brain:  _ he couldn’t get attached.  _ Not to Minghao’s smiles, not to his presence, not to his gentle hands, not to his voice, not to the way he cradled Yeona in his arms as if she was  _ their  _ daughter-

 

Jeonghan promised himself that he wouldn’t get attached. Minghao was making keeping that promise increasingly difficult. 

 

~

 

It stormed that night. Jeonghan liked storms, appreciated the natural white noise they provided. Although, he was occasionally started by a loud crack of thunder, or a tree branch bouncing off his window, Jeonghan wasn’t afraid of storms. He prefered to be inside when they were happening, but he wasn’t afraid. It appeared that his daughter wasn’t afraid either. 

 

Minghao had gone back home that evening, saying that he needed to finish the last of his packing so he could officially move in the next day. Jeonghan had protested, but Minghao was adamant about not wanting to hurriedly pack in the morning. He left late, around 10:30 pm, and by then it was already storming, and had been for hours, with no end in sight. 

 

The sky was darker than usual, clouds hung low, and the air stuck to Jeonghan’s skin as he walked Minghao to the bus stop outside of the apartment complex. Jeonghan really tried not to notice how Minghao’s hands trembled when thunder rumbled above them, and how his feet planted a bit too firmly into the ground in fear that he would slip. Jeonghan tried not to notice, but he did. He couldn’t stop himself from reaching over and taking Minghao’s hand in his free one. 

 

Minghao didn’t look up at him, eyes set on the soppy ground below, but Jeonghan felt the tendons in his fingers tremble, and gripped his hand tighter. Minghao sent him a thankful smile. 

 

They didn’t speak, only exchanging gentle squeezes at every flash of lightning and passing grumble of thunder. Jeonghan sat with Minghao underneath the bus shelter, wrapping his arm around the younger’s thin shoulders. Minghao had always felt small to him, but now he felt so fragile and delicate, somehow smaller when he tucked himself into Jeonghan’s shoulder, leaning his head against his collarbones. 

 

“You can go back inside. I’m sure Yeona misses you.” Minghao mumbled. Jeonghan felt his breath through his thin t-shirt, and pulled Minghao closer. “Josh’s got her. She’ll be okay without me for a little while.” Joshua had stopped them in the hallway as they left Jeonghan’s apartment, saying, “Don’t take her outside- she’ll get sick. Go do whatever you need to do. I’ll watch her until you get back.” Jeonghan thanked him at least twelve times before joining Minghao at the elevator. 

 

A particularly threatening clap of thunder scared Jeonghan enough to make him jump a little in his seat, but had Minghao shaking like a leaf in his arms. Jeonghan pushed his face into his neck, using his other hand to turn Minghao towards him. “Shhh,” he hushed, bringing a hand to Minghao’s hair, carding through it lightly. “It’s okay. I’m right here. You’re okay.” Jeonghan really wasn’t sure if what he was doing was what Minghao needed, but he remembered his grandmother doing something similar when he was young. 

 

Something she said when it stormed always stuck with Jeonghan: “You know, the sky gets angry, too. It screams and cries the same way we do. But it always calms down eventually. Sometimes, we’ll even see a rainbow afterwards. That’s how we know the sky is okay.” 

 

Jeonghan felt Minghao smile into his throat when he finished speaking. He felt more than heard Minghao say, “You’re going to be the greatest father, Jeonghan. I just know it.” 

 

~

 

Jeonghan held his fussing daughter against his chest, rocking her back and forth as he looked out the window into the night sky. The rain had come to a steady stop around midnight, long after Jeonghan had received a text from Minghao saying he made it home safely. 

 

He was tempted to call Minghao now, simply to hear his voice, or to let Yeona hear his voice to calm her down. But he couldn’t do that to the boy- he needed rest. 

 

It was 2:00 in the morning, and Yeona had developed a schedule of waking up every two hours, so Jeonghan was becoming used to her wakings. Still, he wasn’t as good at calming her as Minghao. 

 

“Baby, what do you want?” he asked his daughter, staring down at her wide eyes. She wasn’t crying, only whining each time Jeonghan tried to lay her down in bed. He assumed she just wanted to be held, and he had only himself to blame for that. He was constantly holding his little girl. 

 

“Do you wanna sleep on the couch tonight? That way daddy can hold you?” Jeonghan had been afraid to fall asleep while holding Yeona, scared she would someone escape his grasp and fall to the floor. Just the thought of it made him question it. But he was tired, his daughter was fussy, and Minghao was on the other side of town. So, Jeonghan grabbed a blanket and a couple pillows from his room, and situated himself and Yeona on the couch. 

 

He looked down at her, brushing the dark hair out of her eyes (her hair was getting  _ long,  _ wow), and watching as she clung tightly to Jeonghan’s ring finger before sticking it in her mouth. Jeonghan smiled, reaching for the pacifier he’d brought with them, and quickly replaced his finger with it. 

 

His daughter really did resemble him. Her eyes were round and soft, and the same dark brown hue as his; her eyelashes fanned out over her cheeks, and he couldn’t remember if Yeona’s mother had long eyelashes, but he was glad his daughter had them either way. Her cheeks still held so much extra fat, and Jeonghan could picture his mother pinching the living daylights out of his little girl’s cheeks. He didn’t think Yeona would mind, though. Thankfully, she seemed to have his calm disposition so far. One thing he did remember about the mother of his child is that she was a hot-head, and had a short fuse when it came to most things. 

 

Jeonghan didn’t keep in contact with her after their first meeting, but he did ask around about her to see if anyone knew her. Of course, someone did, and they had nothing but bad things to say about her. They strongly advised Jeonghan to get tested for STDs- which he did, and he was clean -and encouraged him  _ not  _ to start a relationship with her. Jeonghan only wanted to apologize for his mistakes, but ended up abandoning that mission.

 

Though Jeonghan didn’t plan on having children anytime soon, especially not with a woman he didn’t know, he still would never consider Yeona to be a mistake. A consequence of his mistakes, yes. But not a mistake. 

 

Yeona’s eyes were finally closed, and her breathing had slowed to a steady rhythm. Moonlight broke through the clouds outside, and Jeonghan kissed his daughter’s forehead. 

 

“Goodnight, baby girl. Daddy loves you so much.” 

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know what you thought! comments are very much appreciated :)
> 
> twt/cc: gyuquartz
> 
> ~ cj


	5. Part Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an update two days in a row! sho is the most spoiled boy!!! 
> 
> ~ cj

Jeonghan’s phone blared Minghao’s contact ringtone in his bedroom, and it took all of his willpower to remove himself and Yeona from the comfort of the couch. The sun was just beginning to rise, and Jeonghan glanced at the clock on the stove in passing, only to remember that he didn’t have his glasses on. Yeona was still fast asleep in his arms despite all the rustling around. Maybe she’d actually slept longer than two hours.

 

“Hello?” Jeonghan cringed at the roughness of his voice as he fumbled around in search of his glasses, balancing his phone between his shoulder and his ear. He didn’t even know he could  _ do  _ that. Minghao chuckled through the speaker. “Good morning, sleepy heads.” The other boy was practically  _ chirping,  _ and Jeonghan had forgotten that Minghao was a morning person. It was a lovely wake-up call. 

 

“Morning,” he replied, setting Yeona down on the bed and sliding his glasses onto his nose. 7:36 am. That was a new record. “How’d you sleep?” he asked. “Okay,” Minghao sighed, and Jeonghan could picture him running his hand through his hair, getting it caught in the morning tangles. “I always wake up every few hours, though. What about you?” Jeonghan smiled. Minghao’s voice was a little scratchy, and Jeonghan couldn’t help but think it was overwhelmingly attractive. “Yeona and I crashed on the couch around 2:00, but she slept through the night after that.” “Really?” The excitement in Minghao’s voice was painfully obvious. And tortuously cute. 

 

“That’s awesome, Jeonghan! I’m glad you were able to get more rest.” If that statement has been in text form, Jeonghan imagines there would’ve been about three smiley faces at the end. Minghao was so expressive, and it made his stomach ache with  _ something. _

 

“You don’t mind picking me up, right? I can still call a friend if it’s too much trouble.” Jeonghan huffed out a laugh to make sure the younger boy knew he wasn’t agitated in the slightest. “Minghao, it’s  _ fine _ . Besides, you’re moving into  _ my  _ house, not your friend’s.” Minghao whined, pouting he assumed, and Jeonghan literally slapped his hand over his mouth to stop himself from responding inappropriately. 

 

This boy was going to be the death of him. 

 

~

 

Getting Yeona strapped into her carseat was  _ much  _ harder by himself. By the time Jeonghan had changed and fed Yeona, bathed himself, and then changed Yeona again, it was 9:30. So, that gave him an hour to get Yeona strapped in and navigate his way to Minghao’s apartment. It was manageable. He figured he could do that. 

 

It was 10:07 when Jeonghan fell into the driver’s seat, and put Minghao’s address into his phone’s GPS. He sighed, seeing that the apartment was only twenty five minutes away. If traffic wasn’t too bad, he could make it there only ten minutes late instead of twenty minutes late. 

 

The plan for that day was simple: Pile all of Minghao’s belongings into Jeonghan’s car, and bring them all back to his apartment safely; drop Yeona off at Josh’s while they hauled everything upstairs; and, finally, unpack everything, and pick Yeona up later that evening. It was a solid plan, and Jeonghan didn’t think he and Minghao would have any problems executing it. 

 

What Jeonghan didn’t take into consideration was the task of  _ eating.  _ They didn’t set aside any time to eat, which is why Jeonghan was very confused to find Minghao wearing a black apron with the words, “potato potato” written in bold print across the chest, and oven mittens on his hands. “Hi! Come on in. I’m just finishing something up in the kitchen,” Minghao beamed at Yeona, greeting, “Hi, princess! Did daddy take good care of you last night?” and kissing the baby’s cheek. 

 

Minghao’s apartment was bare of decorations, and a few suitcases sat stacked together by the door. All that was left was the furniture and the bigger appliances. Jeonghan stepped further inside, and the smell of cooked vegetables and meat wafted through the air. “What are you making?” he asked, walking a bit faster to keep up with Minghao. “Stuff for us to eat later on,” he answered, throwing a smile to Jeonghan over his shoulder. “I figured we would end up ordering takeout if we didn’t already have food made, and I’m not a big fan of spending money on food when it isn’t necessary. Is that okay?” 

 

Jeonghan really wanted to break Minghao of the habit of asking if everything was okay. Knowing what he did about Minghao’s past helped explain his habits a bit, but they still irked Jeonghan. The way Minghao’s voice dipped into an insecure whisper at the end of every sentence made Jeonghan’s heart clench; the thought that anyone could tell Minghao that something he did was  _ wrong  _ infuriated him, and made him want to wrap Minghao in his arms and never let him go again.

 

But, right now, Jeonghan couldn’t do that. Instead, he settled for resting his hand on Minghao’s shoulder, and mumbling, “Of course that’s okay, Minghao. Thank you.” into his ear, wrapping him in a hug from behind him. Like this, Jeonghan could feel Minghao’s stomach tense under his palms, and relax back into him after a moment. Jeonghan really wanted to make the tension go away each time they touched. Maybe he would ask Minghao about it later, when they were both weary from unpacking, and their bellies were full. 

 

At the moment, all Jeonghan cared about was the hand that came up to meet his resting on Minghao’s stomach. Minghao looked back at him, and Jeonghan  _ swore  _ he saw his eyes flicker to his lips. Minghao pulled away too quickly for Jeonghan to question him. He opened the tupperware container on the counter, and Jeonghan unwrapped his arms from around him sadly. 

 

Hugging Minghao was one of those things that Jeonghan couldn’t pinpoint exactly why he enjoyed it. It was like watching his daughter’s chest rise and fall when she slept, listening to a pencil glide across paper, or seeing pollon float through the air. Like breathing in the scent of a room left unopened for years, feeling the weight an impending rainfall, the air heavy with the scent of petrichor, or unfolding a freshly washed blanket. Jeonghan didn’t know why he was so captivated by some things. Minghao just happened to be one of those things.

 

~

 

Minghao’s suitcases fit easily into the trunk of Jeonghan’s car, and they made it back to his-  _ their  _ -apartment before noon, when they said they’d be dropping Yeona off at Joshua’s. 

 

“She just had a bottle about half an hour ago, so she should be fine for awhile. You may want to change her soon, though. And she’ll want to take a nap in an hour or so, so just lay down with her and she should go right to sleep. If she doesn’t-” 

 

“Jeonghan,  _ I’ve got it. _ Go help Minghao unpack before he decides he doesn’t wanna live with you anymore.” 

 

“Okay, okay. Just- please call me if you need anything. Yell across the hallway. I’ll leave the door unlocked, just-”

 

“Jeonghan,  _ go. _ ”

 

“Fine, fine, fine.” Jeonghan sighed, taking his daughter’s little face into his hands, kissing her cheeks. “Be good for Josh, okay Yeonie? We’ll see you later on. I love you, sweetheart.” Jeonghan thought he saw Joshua smile down at the two of them, but he shut the door in his face before he could check. “Leave, Jeonghan!” Joshua yelled. Jeonghan could hear the smile in his voice as he cooed at Yeona. 

 

~

 

“Everything okay?” Minghao asked, unzipping the biggest suitcase on top of his bed. Jeonghan sighed, flopping down on the bed beside the suitcase. “Yeah. I just don’t like leaving her, you know? It makes me feel like a bad parent.” Minghao stopped what he was doing, and Jeonghan could feel his gaze on him even though his eyes were covered by his forearm. 

 

“Jeonghan,” 

 

“What?”

 

“Never say that you’re a bad parent.”

 

Jeonghan removed his arm from his eyes. Minghao’s eyes were set on Jeonghan’s face, and Jeonghan had never seen him look so serious. His hand clenched around a t-shirt, wrinkling it, no doubt. Jeonghan sat up and faced him. “Okay,” he said, taking Minghao’s hand in his and carefully untangling his fingers from the fabric. Indents from his fingernails were left behind in Minghao’s palm. “Minghao,” he mumbled, carding his fingers over the crescent shaped marks. “I’m sorry. I won’t say that anymore.” Jeonghan pressed his fingers flush against Minghao’s, lifting them so their palms sat against each other. He didn’t want to see the indents anymore. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Minghao whispered. His voice sounded watery, and Jeonghan looked up to find tears welling in his eyes. “Hey, hey, it’s okay. I’m not mad, Minghao,” he said, bringing his other hand up to cup Minghao’s cheek. Jeonghan relished in the fact that Minghao leaned into his touch. “I’m glad you told me when something upset you, that way we can fix it. I would much rather you do that than tell me nothing at all. Don’t keep things from me, okay?” Minghao nodded.

 

“You just-” he began, taking the hand resting on his cheek into his own, intertwining their fingers. “You’re  _ such  _ a good parent. I don’t want you to ever think you’re not.” Minghao brought both their joined hands up to his lips, and laid the softest kiss onto Jeonghan’s knuckles. 

 

The day before, the butterflies in Jeonghan’s stomach had unfurled their wings. Today, they were ready to take flight. 

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you don't think jeonghan would be an emotional wreck when he's away from his daughter, then i'm sorry bc that's all i'm giving you lol
> 
> let me know what you thought! comments are appreciated!
> 
> ~ cj
> 
> twt/cc: gyuquartz


	6. Part Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm having so much fun with this story omg
> 
> ily sho!! i hope you enjoy this chapter :)
> 
> ~ cj

Minghao had so many clothes. It might’ve been considered obnoxious to anyone who wasn’t Jeonghan, but he just found it overwhelming  _ adorable  _ to watch Minghao put his clothing onto color-coded hangers.

 

Pretty much all Minghao brought to the apartment was clothes. The three large suitcases they brought up were filled with just that, and other two smaller ones contained shower products, a couple journals, and two cameras - a digital and a polaroid.

 

“What are the cameras for?” Jeonghan questioned, taking the camera out of its case carefully. Minghao was in the bathroom arranging his products, and called back sarcastically, “Jeonghan, what do you think they’re for?” Jeonghan thumbed around the digital camera, pressing buttons aimlessly, and smiled to himself. “For taking pictures of Yeona, I suppose.” 

 

Jeonghan heard the shower door being closed, saw the lights turn off, and Minghao reentered the bedroom with a smile on his face. 

 

“And you, of course.” 

 

~

 

After Minghao’s unpacking was mostly finished, it was time to tackle Yeona’s room. It was only around 1:30, so they had plenty of time to get everything where it needed to be. The only problem was that Jeonghan had no idea where everything needed to be.

 

As of right now, Yeona’s crib sat against the wall opposite the door, with a hamper on one side, and a nightstand on the other. The dresser was pressed against the left-facing wall, and currently just had shopping bags on top of it - clothes, blankets, and a couple toys for Yeona were in the bags. Jeonghan was really not looking forward to putting everything away. 

 

“Okay, so,” Minghao spoke up, clapping his hands together. “Do you want to help me get the rocking chair out of your bedroom, and then we can start putting things away?” Jeonghan nodded, and sulked into his bedroom. Heavy lifting was at the very bottom of the list of “Jeonghan’s Favorite Things”. 

 

The day Minghao and Jeonghan went to buy furniture, they managed to get everything except the nightstand and the rocking chair at one store  _ and _ on sale. Jeonghan practically bought out the section of baby clothing. Yeona was now equipped with dozens of onesies with patterns ranging from flowers to sailboats (they picked some stuff from the boys section as well because it was  _ all on sale _ and  _ would Yeona care _ ? No), a few dresses with matching stretchy pants in case the baby needed to look a little nicer, some baby jeans that Jeonghan  _ prayed  _ her chubby legs would fit into, and about ten pairs of shoes that Minghao figured would get her through the first year.

 

The rocking chair and nightstand were actually from Minghao’s apartment, and had been painted white to match the rest of the furniture. Minghao was an oddly crafty person, something Jeonghan should’ve expected, but didn’t, and he was able to easily rig two pillows to the wooden chair to make it more comfortable, and draped a fluffy light pink blanket over the back. 

 

Once the chair was actually  _ in  _ Yeona’s room, Jeonghan decided to move it into the corner by the door, and place the nightstand next to it. 

 

“Good idea,” Minghao commented, bracing himself to lift one side of the nightstand. “The lamp won’t be too close to her crib that way.” The lamp they’d found was simple, with a cloudy glass bowl fixture at the bottom, and a pastel purple lamp shade. It gave off a warm, yellow light, something that wasn’t too blinding, but definitely lit up a dark room. It was also battery powered (!!), so Jeonghan didn’t have to design Yeona’s room around electrical sockets, or risk the chance of her being shocked by one. 

 

“It looks really good,” Minghao commented, standing back to make sure the furniture was all place correctly. “Oh!” he said suddenly, nearing scaring Jeonghan to death. “What?” he asked, but Minghao was already out the door, and in his own bedroom. Minghao was rummaging through the one suitcase they didn’t completely unpack, the one Jeonghan thought held only journals and the two cameras. 

 

“I forgot that I brought Yeona a present!” he said, holding out a thin, yellow book, and a stuffed Winnie the Pooh. Jeonghan turned the book over, pressing his fingers against the letters of the engraved title:  _ Winnie The Pooh _ . Inside the front cover of the book, there was a note written in Minghao’s sharp-lined print: 

 

_ Princess Yeona,  _

_ This book was my favorite book when I was young, and I hope you’ll love it, too!  Everyone needs a friend  _

_ like Pooh, and I know you’ll be that friend to someone, someday soon. Until then, learn from your _

_ Daddy and I what it means to be a good friend. I promise, we’ll be just as good of friends to you.  _

 

_ Love you lots,  _

_ Minghao  _

 

Jeonghan was overcome with emotion at this small gesture of kindness from Minghao. It was just a book and a stuffed animal, but it was so much more than that to Jeonghan. It was a promise that Minghao would be here to read this to Yeona in the future. It was Minghao cementing himself firmly into Jeonghan and Yeona’s lives. It was Minghao expressing the love he already has for Jeonghan’s daughter, even though he’s known them for less than two weeks. 

 

It was a safety net of sorts, and Jeonghan wouldn’t want anyone but Minghao to hold the ropes taunt, and catch him if he fell. 

 

“I know it’s not much, but it’s kinda sentimental to me. I just wanted Yeona to have something from me.” Minghao was fidgeting with his fingers nervously, and Jeonghan had forgotten to give any sort of response to the gift aside from reading the note in astonishment. 

 

“No, no, no, Minghao, it’s a wonderful gift! She’ll love it, I promise. And I really appreciate it, too. I know I have a lot of books, but I’m not sure how many would be deemed appropriate for children.” 

 

Minghao laughed, and that dazzling smile stretched all the way to his eyes, making them crinkle at the ends. Jeonghan clutched the book and the stuffed bear to his chest, and felt his heart hammer against them.

 

~ 

 

Jeonghan placed the stuffed Winnie at the foot of Yeona’s crib, as well as two solid colored throw pillows - one sky blue, and the other the same pastel pink as the blanket on the back of the rocking chair. The changing pad was set up on top of the dresser with a small plastic trash can on one side, and a weird diaper storage thing that Jeonghan didn’t even know existed before yesterday (“Listen, listen. You just hang it on the side of the dresser and fill the fabric part with diapers! That way, we won’t have plastic diaper bags around all the time. I’ll fill it a couple times each week if you don’t want to.” How could Jeonghan say no to  _ that _ ?)

 

All that was left for them to do was put away Yeona’s clothes and toys. In the closet, was her stroller, an unassembled bouncy chair and high chair for when she got a little older, and the pack-and-play that Jeonghan would move to the living room eventually. They’d put off the clothes for a whole two hours. 

 

Jeonghan and Minghao both stood with their hands on their hips, and their eyebrows furrowed, glaring at the bags of clothes. There was a silence that was thick with anticipation, each man waiting on the other to make the first move. Minghao breathed in heavily. 

 

“How does dinner sound?”

 

Jeonghan smacked his hands to his sides, and cackled. 

 

“Dinner sounds great.”

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> minghao is a softy no one can tell me otherwise. 
> 
> also, if you don't know, Winnie The Pooh is a very popular children's book by A. A. Milne, but is better know by the Disney adaptation. It's a really cute story with many deeper meanings, and it was one of my favorites when i was younger :) 
> 
> let me know what you thought! comments are always appreciated! thank you for reading <3
> 
> twt/cc: @gyuquartz
> 
> ~ cj


	7. Part Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again! this chapter is a bit longer bc it consists of a some mental panicking on jeonghan's part lol
> 
> enjoy! :)
> 
> ~ cj

**__**

 

Minghao was a stupidly good cook. It only made Jeonghan feel a  _ little  _ incompetent, but it mostly made him feel full and exhausted. Jesus, he was getting old. 

 

“Hey, Jeonghan?” Minghao questioned, looking up from his plate of food. Absentmindedly, Jeonghan filed ‘slow eater’ under the Minghao file his brain had created. He hummed in response. “Have you given Yeona a bath?” 

 

Jeonghan wanted to spit out his food. But Jeonghan was an adult, and that wasn’t typically acceptable of adults, so he swallowed instead and shook his head. Really, he had been meaning to bathe Yeona for about a week now, but didn’t know how to go about it. Bathing  _ himself  _ was a daunting task. Bathing a  _ child  _ was incomprehensible. 

 

“You haven’t?” Minghao didn’t look extremely surprised- he looked more resigned, as if he had come to expect this of Jeonghan -, but he did look a bit disappointed. Jeonghan hadn’t been scolded by his parents in a month or so, so he guessed the look Minghao gave him made up for it.

 

Oh, god.  _ His parents.  _

 

Jeonghan pushed his empty plate towards the center of the table, and smacked his forehead on the wood. Minghao’s hand came to rest in his hair, patting it like a child’s. “She didn’t smell bad, so I figured she was fine.” Minghao scoffed, tried to cover it as a cough, and Jeonghan groaned. 

 

“Jeonghan,” He was getting a little tired of the kid saying his name so condescendingly all the time, but he deserved it, honestly. “Do you still take a shower even if you don’t smell bad?” 

 

“My personal hygiene is  _ not  _ something we should be discussing over dinner.” That comment earned Jeonghan a firm  _ slap  _ on the side of his head, and a sigh from Minghao’s direction. “I’ll give her a bath tonight,” he said, gathering their plates to wash. “After that, we’re taking turns, and you’re not getting out of it just because you have  _ ‘papers to grade’  _ or something.” 

 

Jeonghan pillowed his head in his arms, and glared at Minghao. “What if I do have papers to grade?” he asked. Minghao returned his glare with three times as much force. Jeonghan was in over his head getting into a staring competition with the younger boy. “Then your cute ass can grade them after you bathe your daughter.” Minghao smirked, and Jeonghan  _ knew  _ he threw the ‘cute’ comment in there to get him to stop talking.

 

Needless to say, it worked.  __

 

_ ~ _

 

It was 8:30 when Jeonghan knocked on Joshua’s door. He was greeted with a smile, and Yeona letting out a little screech of joy. “Hi, princess!” Jeonghan greeted. The nickname Minghao had given his daughter was catching on. “How was she?” he asked Joshua, taking the baby into his arms, and laying a kiss on top of her head. Yeona snuggled down into his chest.

 

“She was great, as usual,” Joshua smiled, and took one of Yeona’s chubby hands in his own. “She’s never able to fall asleep here though, so she’s probably tired. Other than that, she was fine.” Joshua handed over the diaper bag, and Jeonghan thanked him several more times before being pushed back towards his own apartment.

 

“I told you to leave those and we would do them together after she went to bed.” Jeonghan called through the front door. Minghao was doing dishes in the kitchen, and everything about this scenario made Jeonghan feel very  _ married.  _ “And  _ I  _ told  _ you  _ that you wouldn’t want to do dishes after she went to bed. I’m still pretty sure that I’m right.” Minghao smirked at him over his shoulder, and Jeonghan grumbled to himself when his stomach flipped a little. 

 

“Well, finish up. She’s gonna fall asleep if I set her down.” 

 

“Aye aye, Captain.” 

 

Jeonghan was going to  _ die.  _

 

~

 

“We’re giving her a  _ bath  _ in the  _ sink _ ? That doesn’t make any sense, Minghao.” Jeonghan was holding his daughter close to his chest. Yeona was butt naked, and wrapped in a towel that wouldn’t irritate her skin while Minghao filled the kitchen sink with warm water. Minghao sighed, but still had a patient smile on his face. 

 

“That’s why we got this little bath seat. Remember? She’s still too small for us to give her a bath in the tub. For now, she’s safer in the sink.” Jeonghan nodded. As long as his baby girl was safe, he didn’t have any complaints. Minghao knew what he was doing, and Jeonghan trusted the younger boy’s judgement when it came to making decisions including his daughter. 

 

“So, the way it’s done in the hospital is a little different from how we’re going to do it here,” Minghao explained, motioning for Jeonghan to hand Yeona over. Minghao had swaddled her tightly in the towel, and unwrapped her from it with a practiced hand, and Jeonghan was kind of amazed by it. “Hospitals have specific equipment to use when it comes to bathing babies. It’s really nothing special though, and we have all the same stuff here,”

 

Minghao had laid out the baby soap they’d purchased the day before, two baby washcloths, a cup, baby lotion, and a fresh towel. He sat Yeona in the tub chair, and made sure that her head was positioned comfortably before he filled the cup with water and poured it over her tummy. 

 

Yeona giggled and flailed her arms around, smacking Minghao in the process. The younger boy just laughed, and let out a deep exhale before he turned to face Jeonghan. “You’re really lucky she’s a good baby. I figured she would be, but some babies scream and cry when they’re given baths.” he said, filling the cup once more, and dumping it over Yeona’s waving arms. Minghao shielded her eyes with his hand, and poured the rest of the water over Yeona’s head, smiling at her the whole time. 

 

“The biggest struggle with bathing babies is that they get cold really easily. That’s why you have to do everything kinda fast, and keep them entertained while you’re doing it. It doesn’t seem like you’ll have much of a problem with her though.” Minghao lathered the baby soap in one of the washcloths, and wiped Yeona down with it. While he was doing that, Minghao leaned down whenever Yeona would start to fuss, and peppered kisses all over her face, which effectively cheered her up. Jeonghan’s heart was in shambles. 

 

“Why do you have two washcloths?” Jeonghan asked, pushing some of Yeona’s hair out of her face. Did her hair need to be washed, too? “One’s for washing, and the other one’s for rinsing. You don’t have to use two- up you go, Yeonie. It’s just a force of habit for me from working in the hospital. There’s less germs here, though.” Minghao explained this quickly, all while keeping Yeona occupied as he picked her up to wash her back. “Do you wanna wash her back while I hold her?” he asked, offering the washcloth to Jeonghan. He took it hesitantly. 

 

Jeonghan wouldn’t admit this to Minghao, but he made everything look so  _ easy.  _ He made taking care of a child look effortless, and Jeonghan was envious. He was also horribly afraid of hurting his daughter, so he tended to do things very gently and slowly. Minghao constantly told him that Yeona wasn’t a glass doll, and she wasn’t going to break, but Jeonghan wasn’t so sure. 

 

“You can move a little faster, Jeonghan. My shirt is kinda soaked.” Minghao’s voice broke Jeonghan out of his internal monologue just in time for him to look up and see Minghao smiling at him. That was all the encouragement he needed to finish wiping Yeona’s back. “Make sure you get the back of her neck,” Minghao said, tipping Yeona’s head towards his chest. “Your kid has some serious fat rolls, Jeonghan, and I don’t want any bacteria growing between them.” Minghao laughed, and, okay, Jeonghan agreed that his daughter was a little on the chubby side, but she was  _ cute _ . 

 

When Minghao was finally able to sit Yeona back down in the tub chair, Jeonghan saw that his shirt really was soaked. Soaked through, actually, and it was very distracting for Jeonghan’s eyes. Of course, today would be the day Minghao would wear a plain white t-shirt when Jeonghan had never seen him wear one  _ ever.  _ And  _ of course _ his plain white t-shirt would get wet and expose every dip and curve of his  _ tiny  _ frame to Jeonghan.  _ Of course  _ Minghao would have a toned stomach, and of  _ fucking  _ course his toned stomach would be tan and  _ gorgeous.  _ Jeonghan prayed for the earth to swallow him. 

 

It did not help that Minghao was currently bathing Jeonghan’s daughter, and speaking to her as if _he was her father,_ _too_ , and Jeonghan was pretty sure his heart was doing jumping jacks at the sight of Minghao blowing a loud raspberry onto Yeona’s stomach. Minghao seemed to pay no attention to the state of distress Jeonghan was currently in. All his focus was on the baby in front of him, and Jeonghan didn’t know if that was worse. 

 

All Jeonghan knew was that his heart had expanded to make a home for Minghao there, and Jeonghan’s plan of not getting attached was foiled because of it. He wasn’t sure if it was a bad thing, though. Jeonghan would allow Minghao to live comfortably in his heart for as long as the boy wanted to.

 

“Alright, Yeonie, you’re all done!” Minghao exclaimed, wrapping Yeona in the soft towel. “Let’s get you dried off and changed, baby girl.” Jeonghan hadn’t heard Minghao call her baby girl before, and it nearly made him choke. “Do you want to go make a bottle, and I’ll get her ready for bed?” Jeonghan nodded, and went to retrieve what he needed to make Yeona a bottle. Joshua hadn’t said if she’d eaten recently or not, but his daughter never turned down food, so Jeonghan figured it was okay. 

 

As he shook the bottle and made his way to Yeona’s room, Jeonghan paused in the hallway. Minghao was singing. Presumably to Yeona, but he was  _ singing.  _ Jeonghan peeked his head into the doorway, and found Yeona laying on the changing table, squirming as she usually did, while Minghao rubbed lotion into her skin. She stopped moving around nearly as soon as Minghao began to sing, and just stared up at the boy. He smiled down at the baby, and poked her nose when he came to a line just before what Jeonghan assumed was the chorus. Yeona smiled.

 

The song was in Mandarin, and Jeonghan didn’t understand a word of it, but it didn’t matter. Minghao was  _ singing  _ to  _ his daughter _ and nothing mattered in that moment besides Yeona’s smile and Minghao’s voice. It sounded just how Jeonghan imagined it would: light, similar to his laugh, but with the same tone and depth as when he spoke Mandarin. Jeonghan wondered if his voice would change if he sang in English. 

 

He was enraptured; completely mystified by Minghao’s singing, and Jeonghan didn’t think he’d ever felt this way about someone’s voice. Minghao continued to sing as he wrapped a clean diaper around Yeona, and dressed her in a sleep sack (Jeonghan still didn’t really understand sleep sacks, but Minghao said they were useful, and he couldn’t argue with Minghao).

 

As soon as Minghao lifted Yeona into his arms, Jeonghan deemed it safe for him to enter the room without collapsing onto the floor. “Hey,” Minghao greeted, heading towards the rocking chair. “Do you want to feed her and rock her? I can go get started on the dishes.” He handed the baby over to Jeonghan, but there was a problem: Jeonghan didn’t want Minghao to leave. 

 

“Um,” he began, taking a seat in the chair- it was actually pretty comfortable. Huh. “W-would you mind staying here until she falls asleep?” Minghao nodded, and sat down on the floor in front of Jeonghan. Yeona was situated against one of the pillows in the chair, and quickly latched onto the bottle. Jeonghan watched her silently for a few moments before he began explaining her new surroundings to her:

 

“So, this is your new room, Yeona. Daddy and Minghao put together all the stuff we got yesterday, and now it’s yours. We’ll decorate it a little more soon, and you’ll be able to redecorate it yourself when you’re older. This rocking chair and the nightstand are from Minghao. They’re pretty cool, right? We painted them white, though, because Daddy is a stickler for color coordination, and everything else was already white, so there was no turning back,” Jeonghan glanced down in front of him to see Minghao smiling, his hands spreading over the carpet absentmindedly, picking at the loose threads. He continued.

 

“And we found your crib and dresser on sale because Minghao is apparently a couponer and decided not to tell me that when we got groceries, but, whatever,” Minghao laughed and smacked Jeonghan on the knee. His hand stayed there afterwards. “I didn’t want to paint the walls just yet because our landlord is out of town, but if you want to when you’re older, we’ll paint them. You can even help if you want to, princess.” Minghao thumb made nondescript shapes on Jeonghan’s knee, and he found that he enjoyed it. Usually, his legs were ticklish, but Minghao’s touch just made him feel relaxed. 

 

“Minghao got you a present, Yeona. He gave it to me earlier, but we’ll show you when you’re more awake. It’s a book called  _ Winnie The Pooh _ and a stuffed Winnie The Pooh. It was Minghao’s favorite book when he was little, so I’m pretty sure it’ll be one of your favorites, too. Daddy has a lot of books, but Minghao got you your first one. Remember that.” Yeona’s eyes were slipping closed, and her sucking on the bottle was beginning to slow.

 

Jeonghan saw out of the corner of his eye what he thought was a  _ fond  _ look from Minghao. 

 

But it wasn’t directed at Yeona. 

 

It was directed at  _ him.  _

 

Jeonghan pulled the bottle out of Yeona’s mouth without a fight, and stood up to lay her in her crib. “I’m kinda nervous to leave her in here.” he admitted, laying her on her back. Minghao placed a hand on his waist from behind. “She’ll be okay. Besides, we both have baby monitors in our rooms, so it’ll be easier for us to hear her if she cries.” Minghao squeezed him a little, and Jeonghan shifted closer to him, humming. “You’re right,” he sighed. “I just feel bad leaving her in here by herself.” Minghao pulled him closer, bringing his hand up to Jeonghan’s shoulder, and holding him there.

 

They stood in silence, Jeonghan’s head on Minghao’s shoulder, his arms folded across his chest, until Minghao released his hold and leaned down to kiss Yeona’s forehead. “Goodnight, princess.” he whispered. 

 

Minghao turned around and did something unexpected. 

 

He placed a kiss on Jeonghan’s forehead, as well. 

 

~  

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> let me know what you thought! comments are always appreciated :)  
> if you want to come yell at me on twitter or curiouscat, my @ is gyuquartz <3
> 
> thank you for reading! see you soon c:
> 
> ~ cj


	8. Part Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello again! i apologize for the wait; i've been busy this week ;-;  
> this chapter is a big longer to make up for it! we get a glimpse into jeonghan's job, and how close he and minghao are becoming ^-^
> 
> enjoy!
> 
> ~ cj

For Jeonghan, Monday's were just as bad as a 27-year-old high school teacher as they were when he was a 16-year-old high school student. He still groaned when his alarm clock signaled 6:30 a.m.; he still resented the sunlight when it finally broke through the curtains; he was still tempted to fake being sick so he could stay home. The only difference was the lack of an  _ adult  _ to advise him against staying home and sleeping the day away. 

 

Now,  _ he  _ was the adult. Not only was Jeonghan in charge of himself, but he was in charge of multiple classes of cynical high school students who sulked into his classroom, and cringed away when he greeted them, “Good morning, hooligans” or, “Good afternoon, you unwashed miscreants. I'm ready to go home, too, stop whining.”

 

Jeonghan tried to be the kind of teacher he would've appreciated in high school: caring, but not overbearing, understanding, but not pitying, fair and just, and  _ tolerable _ . He really just wanted to seem like he enjoyed being there, and cared about the kids he taught. 

 

And he did. Occasionally, Jeonghan would have a student that was genuinely interested in Jeonghan’s field of expertise, and it would remind him all over again that he really did love his job. 

 

But it was times like now that Jeonghan wondered why the  _ hell  _ he decided to become a  _ teacher  _ of all things. 

 

His alarm clock was blaring in his ear, and Jeonghan’s sleep-ridden mind registered it as a fire alarm instead of an alarm clock. Not for the first time, Jeonghan woke in a panic of flailing limbs and curses, only to find Minghao standing in the doorway looking at him and chuckling. 

 

“Bad dream?” Minghao asked, muffling his laughter into his hand. He was leaning against the door frame now, and scoffed when Jeonghan swung at his alarm clock. “For some goddamn reason,” he began, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “my alarm clock sounds like the fire alarm at the high school I went to. Every few days, it scares me shitless, and I tell myself I'll change the alarm tone that night. Obviously, I've never gotten around to it.” 

 

Minghao hid another round of giggles behind his palms, and Jeonghan trudged over to him, pushing his glasses up his nose, and running a hand through his hair. It caught half way over his scalp, and Jeonghan sighed. 

 

Just as Jeonghan’s eyes began to roll to the side, he caught a glimpse of Minghao’s blushing cheeks. He stopped himself. “Why are you all red?” he asked, knowing full well that he probably looked rather attractive in his raw state. Messing with Minghao was just too fun. “Just a little warm.” he answered, turning into the hallway at the sound of Yeona’s cries. 

 

Jeonghan let him go. This time. 

 

~

 

“Is there anything I can do to help you feel like  _ less  _ of a housewife?” 

 

“Nope, it's too late for that. I already feel like the lead female in a 1950s sit-com. Now, go be the breadwinner, honey. I'll have dinner ready when you get home.” 

 

Jeonghan rolled his eyes at Minghao’s sarcastic remark, but smiled, nonetheless. The younger boy had become noticeably cockier lately. 

 

“Seriously, you don't have to make dinner or clean or anything. All you have to do is take care of Yeona. I don't expect you to do anything else, Minghao.” Jeonghan was doing his best to convey to Minghao that he  _ didn't want him to feel like a housewife _ , but Minghao wasn't having it. Jeonghan had only received snarky replies since he woke. 

 

“Hush, dear. You'll wake the baby.” 

 

“Oh, for god’s sake- she's awake, Minghao!”

 

Yeona was, indeed, awake, and was currently resting comfortably in Minghao’s arms sucking happily on a bottle while the boy swayed back and forth at the dining room table. The two looked so content to just be in each other's presence, and Jeonghan felt his heart quiver. 

 

Minghao laughed, and moved himself and Yeona into the living room. He flopped down on the couch, and glanced over at Jeonghan. “You're going to be late, Jeonghan.” he smiled, and Jeonghan’s heart was working far too hard for this early in the morning. He blamed it on the gurgling noises Yeona was making at Minghao. 

 

Jeonghan nodded. “Right,” he mumbled, gathering his briefcase, his coat, and patting his pockets to check for his phone and keys. “Really, Minghao,” he paused, not feeling his phone in his back pocket. Minghao pointed to the countertop. There it sat.

 

“I don't expect you to do anything except care for Yeona. That's enough of a hassle on its own.”

 

Minghao hoisted Yeona onto his shoulder and patted her back while making his way over to Jeonghan, shoving him towards the door with his whole body. “Go. To. Work.” he accented every word with a slight push until Jeonghan was forced to open the door and step into the hallway. 

 

“I'm going, I'm going.” Jeonghan expected Minghao to shut the door in his face. Much to his surprise, he turned Yeona around, laid her back flush against his chest, and supported her legs with his arms so she was facing Jeonghan. “Say bye bye to daddy, Yeonie!” he took hold of her hand and “waved” at Jeonghan. 

 

Jeonghan couldn't help but smile at his daughter. And at Minghao. 

 

“Bye, baby,” he placed a kiss on the tuft of hair at the crown of Yeona’s head. “Be good for Minghao today. Daddy’ll be back later this afternoon.” One more kiss was laid on Yeona’s cheek before Jeonghan looked up to Minghao. “I'll see you later. Don't work too hard.” Minghao’s dazzling smile had returned, and Jeonghan thought the kid was too cute for his own good. 

 

“I won't. Don't harass those high school kids too much,” Minghao leaned a bit closer, bringing his lips to Jeonghan’s ear. “And I'm making dinner whether you want me to or not.” Jeonghan felt the soft pressure of lips against his cheek, and didn't even have time to react- or  _ reciprocate _ , dammit -before Minghao was stepping back into the apartment, shouting, “Have a good day!” and closing the door. 

 

Well, Jeonghan was partially right: Minghao did shut the door in his face. But he was okay with it.

 

~

         The drive to school usually didn't take Jeonghan more than fifteen minutes. However, the weekend was so eventful that Jeonghan felt like he hasn't taught a class in  _ years.  _ He could've easily mistaken his last conversation with Mingyu for one that happened months ago. He had become  _ that _ detached from the world to focus on his daughter and Minghao. 

 

Jeonghan ran through his schedule outloud into the open space of the car, but it wasn't helping him focus the way it normally did. He couldn't remember for the life of him what his AP Physics class had been learning, and his third period Physical Science class completely missed his train of thought. 

 

What did he even have to  _ teach  _ today? Jeonghan hadn't so much as glanced at his lesson plans over the weekend, too engrossed with getting Minghao settled in, and then  _ watching  _ Minghao get settled in- oh, god. 

 

Did he even  _ have _ lesson plans?

 

A car horn blared from behind. Jeonghan had forgotten he was at a stop light. His foot pressed into the gas pedal, and Jeonghan prayed for the day to go smoothly despite his tragic realization that he had  _ no lesson plans _ . 

 

~

       “I'm the disorganized one in the Science Department, Jeonghan. Not you,” Mingyu was poking at a salad, pointing his fork at Jeonghan when he spoke. Jeonghan’s cheek was pillowed in his palm and he couldn't care less about the oils transferring to his face because of it. “Hell, Miss Evans on a  _ bad day  _ is more organized than you are today. And that's saying something.” 

 

Said Miss Evans (Natalie, as some addressed her, but Mingyu was her junior and was a stickler for that kind of thing) nodded in Jeonghan’s direction, lifting her eyebrows in agreement from across the table. 

 

Lunch time was usually when teachers appeared most jovial, and today was no exception. Jeonghan couldn't keep up the act in front of his fellow educators, though. “Mingyu’s right,” Natalie commented. Jeonghan raised his head to look at her. “I'm the most disorganized person I know, but you're normally not like this. Is everything okay, Jeonghan?” 

 

Jeonghan was grateful for the kindness of his coworkers. They didn't push him to talk about the situation with Yeona- though they all knew about it - and they offered their help whenever it was needed. Most generally, Jeonghan didn't take them up on their offers of assistance simply because he was stubborn. But this was different. This was his  _ job _ , and he had been thrown all out of whack because of one eventful weekend. 

 

“I'm alright. This weekend was just very eventful,” he sat up fully in his chair, peeling the banana Minghao had placed in his lunch bag (What an angel). “Do you remember Gyu and I talking about finding a live-in babysitter for Yeona?” Natalie nodded, along with Selma (or, Mrs. Campagne as Mingyu insisted), another teacher in their department. 

 

“Well, I got one moved in this weekend. His name is Minghao; he's a friend of Gyu’s from college. He was an infantile nurse at the hospital downtown, but he wasn't getting enough hours. He's wonderful with Yeona, and he's blended so seamlessly into our lives, and it feels too…  _ right.  _ I don't know, that probably doesn't make any sense.” Jeonghan was rambling and he knew it. Mingyu laid a hand on his friend’s shoulder. 

 

“Jeonghan… You're gay, right?” Selma was always the type to say whatever was on her mind without much hindrance. Jeonghan admired that about her. “Bisexual, but yeah. Why?” The three teachers shared a look between them that left Jeonghan a little dumbfounded and very far out of the loop. 

 

“What?” he questioned again. Natalie was grinning devilishly at Mingyu, who shared the same expression with Selma. They had obviously come to a conclusion, but weren't going to share it with Jeonghan. “Guys,  _ what?”  _ Mingyu snickered, Natalie hid her laugh behind her hand, and Selma snorted without hesitation. 

 

“Oh, my  _ god.  _ This is worse than high school. I hate you guys.” There was no malice in his tone; only fond annoyance. Jeonghan gathered his trash, and made his way to the door of the teacher's lounge. He left the three to cackle by themselves. 

 

~

 

“Mr. Yoon, you didn’t have to teach today. I’m sure the rest of the class wouldn’t mind.” 

“Rena, I didn’t ask for your sass.” Rena Park was one of Jeonghan’s favorite students. She was bright, both mentally and physically: her mind was sharp, and she had no problem voicing her opinions; her smile was all perfect teeth and dimples, and her eyes were always shining with curiosity. Usually, Rena only stayed after class to speak with Jeonghan if she had a question, or she could tell something was wrong. The girl was very intuitive.

 

“Is everything okay, Mr. Yoon? You really did seem a little out of it today.” These kids really did know Jeonghan as well as he knew himself. Sometimes if frightened him how observant they were, but he was glad for it more often than not. “Is it about your daughter?” Jeonghan sighed.

 

Rena was one of the few students who knew about Yeona, and it was an accident. Jeonghan had pulled out his phone to show Rena an article they were going to be reviewing in class, and had forgotten that a picture of Yeona was his lockscreen. 

 

“Who’s that?” Rena had asked, leaning closer to the phone. Jeonghan probably could’ve played it off and said Yeona was his niece, or a friend’s child, but he didn’t for some reason. He wanted to show Yeona off to the world, and revealing her to Rena was a good place to start. “That’s my daughter, Yeona.” 

 

Of course, Rena had practically thrown herself onto Jeonghan, congratulating him, but also smacking at his arms for not telling her. Since then, Rena had managed to keep the secret from her classmates, while Jeonghan told a few other students on his own. Rena only mentioned Yeona in private, and Jeonghan knew that the hallways were mostly clear of students at this point, so he didn’t mind answering.

 

“Not exactly,” Jeonghan began, packing his laptop and his lesson plan binders into his messenger bag. He had a shitload of work to do tonight. “I hired a live-in babysitter to take care of Yeona while I’m not home, and he moved in this weekend. We also finished Yeona’s room, and got her settled in, and my lesson plans completely slipped my mind. I didn’t have anything planned for any of my classes today.” Jeonghan laughed lightly at his own stupidity. Explaining it out loud so many times today was exhausting him.

 

Rena frowned. “Mr. Yoon, you know I-” Jeonghan raised his hand in front of his chest, stopping Rena’s offer of help. He smiled. “I know, Rena, and I appreciate the offer. But you’re a kid- a very mature one, but still a kid. This is your last year of high school, and you need to spend it being a  _ kid.  _ Trust me, I’m okay. Minghao is wonderful, and we have the whole situation with Yeona figured out. It was just this weekend that was stressful,” Jeonghan patted the top of Rena’s head, but only because he knew she  _ hated  _ when he did that. 

 

“Don’t worry about me,” he said, slinging his messenger bag over his shoulder. “Worry about your college applications, and get me your info so I can write my letter of recommendation!” 

 

Some people argued that Jeonghan was too personable with his students; that he revealed too much of his personal life, and crossed professional boundaries. Jeonghan didn’t agree. Every teacher who had made a difference in his life- who truly motivated him to become an educator -shared their life experiences in the classroom. Each of those teachers allowed Jeonghan to open up to them, to be himself, and to find structure and comfort in their presence. 

 

If Jeonghan could be the strong-standing tower of motivation of just  _ one student _ , then he will have accomplished his goal. Not only to teach, but to protect, to help grow, and to nurture. To leave a lasting impression on the world by expanding the horizons of his students. 

 

Jeonghan only hoped he could do the same for his daughter. 

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did you think?? let me know! i love reading comments from you guys; they make me sooo happy :)  
> come yell at me on twitter or curiouscat if you'd like: @gyuquartz
> 
> thank you for reading! ily <3
> 
> ~ cj


	9. Part Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a kinda sappy look into minghao's childhood, and the parallels to his life now! enjoy! <3 
> 
> ~ cj

Minghao was on the phone when Jeonghan stepped in the apartment, Yeona laying contentedly in the crook of his elbow. He was speaking quietly into his phone, and turned his head at the sound of the door opening. Minghao smiled over his shoulder. 

 

“I have to go, Meiqui. Yeah, Jeonghan’s home. Tell mom to call me sometime tomorrow, then. Love you, too, flower.” Minghao laughed when he hung up the call, and turned to face Jeonghan the best he could from the couch. 

 

“Hey,” Minghao began, the smile not leaving his cheeks. “How was your day? Anything exciting happen?” Jeonghan groaned, toeing off his shoes and setting his messenger bag on the counter. “Well, I completely forgot to make any lesson plans for this week, so I had to make my lessons up as I went today, and the kids noticed, and a couple confronted me about it. Mingyu was being strangely cryptic today when I talked about you, and my coworkers kinda grilled me about you at lunch and wouldn't let me sulk in peace, and now I have to pull some bullshit lessons  _ out of my ass _ for the entire  _ week _ , and-” 

 

Minghao watched in amusement as Jeonghan gesticulated with his hands, and he wanted to let him keep going to get all his frustrations out, but the older man had yet to take a breath, and Minghao really didn't want him to pass out. 

 

“Jeonghan,” Minghao interrupted, holding up his free hand. He beckoned Jeonghan over to join him on the couch, pulling him down by the sleeve when he came close enough. Minghao watched as Jeonghan settled down beside him, eyes brightening at the sight of his daughter. 

 

“Hey, baby girl.” he whispered, holding his finger out for Yeona to take in her own chubby hand. Jeonghan leaned back into the couch, closing his eyes for a moment, and allowing his head to rest against Minghao’s shoulder. He hadn't even noticed the hand wrapped around his waist, fingers drawing small circles at his hip. 

 

“Jeonghan,” Minghao tried again, whispering into Jeonghan’s hair this time. “ _ Breathe.  _ You had a busy weekend, and I'm really thankful for all your help. You have plenty of time to do your lesson plans, and I'll help you however I can. I'm sure that your students understand, and wouldn't be too against having a free day if you don't have anything planned.” Jeonghan leaned a little further into Minghao’s chest, happy to just listen to his voice rumble under him. 

 

“You’re right,” Jeonghan sighed trying to subtly inhale Minghao’s scent at his collarbones; he smelled of clean laundry, something fruity, and Yeona’s baby lotion. Jeonghan couldn’t get enough of it. “Not to point any fingers, but it’s kinda looking like I might have to start bringing work home again if you keep distracting me on the weekends.” He really didn’t mean for that to sound as flirty as it did, but how Minghao interpreted it wasn’t his concern. 

 

Minghao only smiled as his thumb continued on its journey over his hip bone. 

 

~

 

         Getting Jeonghan to lay on the couch with him was easy. Getting him  _ up  _ was an entirely different struggle that Minghao did not anticipate, but he eventually dragged the older man out of the confines of the couch. 

 

It was 5:30, and Jeonghan sat at the dining room table, his laptop and lesson plan binder sprawled out in front of him while Yeona laid against his chest, pacifier bouncing against her lips. Minghao was cooking something that smelled  _ heavenly _ and, even though Jeonghan had protested that morning, he was visibly excited to be eating Minghao’s cooking again. 

 

Yeona was impairing him from getting much work done- she was keeping his left arm occupied, and Jeonghan’s writing was being to look like a chicken scribbled in his notebook -but he didn't mind one bit. The baby had  _ screamed  _ the second her back touched the crib mattress, and Minghao thrust her into Jeonghan’s arms. 

 

“You keep her happy while I cook,” he proclaimed, giving Jeonghan no chance to object. (He wouldn't have objected either way.) “How does pasta sound?” Jeonghan smiled. He frickin’  _ loved  _ pasta, and it only made his heart swell a  _ tiny  _ bit that Minghao was catching onto his eating habits. 

 

Minghao returned his smile, and placed a loud smooch on Yeona’s cheek, beaming at the little girl. “I hope you take up my eating habits instead of your Daddy’s. You'll turn into a carb if you eat like him.” 

 

Jeonghan’s heart swelled  _ much  _ more than a tiny bit after that. 

 

~

 

         Jeonghan sat in the rocking chair, crading Yeona in his arms while Minghao sat on the floor in front of them, Winnie The Pooh open to the first chapter. He’d noticed recently that Yeona fell asleep much faster if someone was talking, singing, or reading to her, and Minghao was determined to keep up the trend. 

 

Yeona was staring up at her father, eyes wide with her pacifier stuck firmly between her lips. Jeonghan smiled down at her, listening to Minghao read the introduction to Pooh and Christopher Robin’s adventures, and he realized that this was probably a very familiar scene for Minghao. 

 

One of their topics of conversation when doing the dishes the night before had been about Minghao’s sister, Meiqui, and their childhood together. “We spent all day every day together,” Minghao explained, handing another clean plate to Jeonghan to dry. “Mom would be in her bedroom for hours, only coming out to use the bathroom every now and again. Meiqui was only three, so I had to take care of her on my own, and there was no way I was going to leave her home alone while I was at school. That’s why I was held back for a year in middle school- I went for the first few weeks, and then stayed home with Meiqui for the rest of the year,” 

 

Jeonghan tried to keep his face as impassive as possible while listening to Minghao’s story, but the dishes were all clean, and now he had nothing to look at except Minghao. And his face gave away every emotion that ran through his mind: Jeonghan saw fondness flash across his eyes at the mention of Meiqui, sadness at the fact that a year of education was denied from him, and his own anger at a man he had never met with abandoning his children when they were so young.

 

“Meiqui was a really happy baby, but she got fussier the older she got. She always cried for our dad, but he wasn’t there, and I didn’t know how to make her feel better. She usually always cried herself to sleep if I laid down with her and held her for long enough,” Jeonghan thought he saw tears beading in the corners of Minghao’s eyes, but they were gone before he could question it, or wipe them away with his thumb. Minghao was back to smiling. 

 

“I eventually decided to try something different. There was this song- an old Chinese lullaby. My mom always sang it to Meiqui when she was a baby, and she sang it to me, too, when I couldn’t sleep. I’m sure she’d sing it now if I called and asked her to,” Minghao was smiling, leaning against the counter with the sleeves of his shirt rolled up above his elbows, his reading glasses tilted on the bridge of his nose, and his house slippers shuffling back and forth on the linoleum. In that moment, Jeonghan felt much too attached to him.

 

“That night, when Meiqui cried for our dad, I sang the lullaby to her. She calmed down so quickly that I thought I had scared her. But she just watched me sing the entire time- her eyes never left my face,” Minghao’s eyes fell from Jeonghan’s face to his own hands, fiddling with the dish towel wrapped around his fingers. Jeonghan watched as Minghao tied it into a knot with his pointer fingers, and undid the knot with his ring fingers. Minghao was a fidgeter, but Jeonghan had never caught him doing something so intricate with his fingers before. 

 

“I sang to her every night after that. It wasn’t always the same song; when she got a little older, she’d ask me to sing Mom’s favorite songs to her, and I’d sing songs by Liu Chia-Chang, Fei Fei Ou Yang, and Tsai Chin. I’d read to her a lot, too. Mom and I did the same thing that we do with Yeona when Meiqui was a baby: she’d sit in the rocking chair and feed Meiqui, and I’d sit on the floor and read to her.” Minghao’s smile was becoming a bit watery again, and Jeonghan decided to stop his story there. He patted Minghao’s cheek gently, caressing it with his thumb in a way that was probably more than friendly, but Jeonghan didn’t care.

 

And there they were now, in the same position that Minghao had found himself in so many times as a child. Except now, this baby was of no relation to him (though Minghao did love Yeona), the person in the rocking chair was  _ definitely  _ not his mom (it was Jeonghan, and Minghao was infinitely grateful for that), and Minghao was a bit more confused about his feelings. 

 

Minghao knew that he loved Yeona- anyone who spent a significant amount of time with her would love her. But he didn’t love Yeona the way he loved the babies who were in long-term care at the hospital, or the way he loved his cousins back in China. It was a different kind of love, one that he had never felt, and hadn’t expected to feel for quite some time. 

 

Minghao assumed that this was how Jeonghan felt when he first met Yeona: the shock of suddenly having a daughter, of unexpectedly  _ being a father _ ; the fear of not being able to raise this perfect little girl the right way, the self-doubt that comes with it, and the undeniable, heart-wrenching feeling of wanting, and knowing, that Minghao would do anything for Yeona. 

 

Minghao knew that he was in too deep, but there was no point in turning back. The wave of emotions had crashed over him days ago, swallowing him up, and carrying him deep into the abyss of Jeonghan and Yeona’s lives. Minghao decided that if this was what drowning felt like, he would suffocate one million times to keep the smile in Jeonghan’s eyes, and the happiness in Yeona’s heart. 

 

~

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments are always appreciated :) thank you for reading! <3  
> come yell at me on twitter if you'd like: @gyuquartz
> 
> ~ cj


	10. Part Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello hellooo~ here's a look into jeonghan's life! enjoy :) 
> 
> ~ cj ♡

They worked together surprisingly well. It wasn’t surprising to Minghao anymore, but it still was to Jeonghan, who thought Minghao would grow tired of him after two weeks. But, two weeks had passed, and Minghao’s suitcases sat comfortably in his closet, and he had no plans of packing them back up anytime soon. They had no issues- no fights, no arguments, no rage-induced injuries -within the first two weeks of living together. Mingyu had even come over for dinner, and commented to Jeonghan the next day that he and Minghao were, “already  _ so  _ married.” Everything was going really well.

 

Then week three rolled around. 

 

They had fallen into a routine during the weekdays: in the morning, Minghao would get up a few minutes before Jeonghan and get himself (and coffee) ready before he woke Yeona up to feed her. Then, Minghao would wake Jeonghan up if his alarm didn’t do the trick. They talked a bit, and got themselves and Yeona ready for the day before Jeonghan left for work, leaving the other two to their own devices. In the evening, Jeonghan had taken to kicking off his shoes and snuggling up with his daughter and Minghao as the younger boy told him about his day, and he did the same. After about thirty minutes of that, Minghao hauled Jeonghan into the kitchen so he could do whatever he needed to for school the next day while Minghao cooked dinner. They ate, fed Yeona, put her to bed, and did the dishes together before they each showered and turned in for the night. 

 

It wasn’t exactly conventional, but it worked. Of course, Jeonghan knew he could get more done if he didn’t take the extra thirty minutes to relax and wrap his arms around Minghao and his baby, but he always arrived home at Yeona’s nap time specifically for that reason: so he could cuddle Minghao  _ and  _ Yeona at the same time. It was a flawless plan. 

 

That is, of course, until Minghao brought up a sour spot that Jeonghan had been avoiding during their after-work-cuddle-time. 

 

“Have you told your parents about Yeona yet?” Minghao’s voice was still soft, his fingers still carding through Jeonghan’s hair, Yeona still snoring beneath them. But Jeonghan was on edge. “No,” he mumbled, fiddling with a loose string on Yeona’s onesie. He needed to cut that off later. “I haven’t thought about it.” Minghao hummed in his ear.

 

Jeonghan’s relationship with his parents was odd. He loved them, and he assumed that they both loved him just the same, but there was something between them that had always felt strained; as if a thread was all that connected them, and it was constantly being pulled taunt. They lived two hours away from him now, and called him once every few months when they were both home, but he didn't seek out their attention.

 

Jeonghan’s mother was a flight attendant, and hadn’t settled down when Jeonghan was born. She was still determined to see as much of the world as she could, and get paid while doing it, and wasn’t going to give up her dream for a family. Jeonghan didn’t resent her for that; after all, he was unplanned, and the young couple didn’t want children in the first place. His mother was a person who couldn’t be tied down- not by a job, not by a husband, and certainly not by a son. 

 

Jeonghan understood why she did what she did, and regained his respect for her in his adult years. He loved his mother, and contacted her as often as possible. 

 

Jeonghan’s father was similar to his mother in some ways, and vastly different in others: the couple shared the same motivation and drive, but their marriage didn't work if they were both chasing different dreams.

 

His father had dreams of living in an enormous house in the mountains of his home country, South Korea. Jeonghan remembered the rare nights when his father would sit at the kitchen table, books open in front of him, jotting down notes with bloodshot eyes. It wasn’t until much later, that Jeonghan realized his father was studying- had gone back to college in fact -to become a lawyer. 

 

Needless to say, Mr. Yoon made a name for himself in the world of law. He gained notoriety as a young lawyer, and a self-proclaimed “family man”, and handled mostly traffic disputes early on in his career. As he gained experience, Jeonghan’s father began taking on more challenging cases: armed robberies, murders, and rapes. Because of the risks with these types of cases, Mr. Yoon typically stayed far away from his family so as to “not expose them to the horrors of the real world”. In reality, Jeonghan’s father was being unfaithful to his wife, who was on the other side of the world.

 

Jeonghan had no idea what kind of person his father was, but he didn’t mind. As soon as he was accepted into the college of his choice, his dad mailed him the money for a down payment, and his mom increased his monthly allowance by two thousand dollars, and told him to buy himself a car to get him through college. 

 

Jeonghan spoke to his father twice during his four years of college. In that time, he only knew the man was still alive because of the money that was wired into his bank account every two weeks.

 

Though Jeonghan had been almost entirely raised by his grandmother, his mother did make an effort to redeem herself and make up for lost time- she planned a surprise party for him after his college graduation; she pulled some strings at the airport, and got a discount on a flight to Korea to see their family; she answered his calls and texts, and actively checked in on him, and visited whenever she was invited. 

 

Jeonghan’s mother was the perfect example of how a person should properly redeem themself after a bad situation. 

 

But still, for some reason, whenever his parents were brought up, the knot in Jeonghan’s stomach cinched a bit tighter. 

 

“Why?” Minghao asked. It was an innocent question; Minghao had no idea about Jeonghan’s situation with his parents, and he wasn't planning to tell the younger boy at the current moment. 

 

Jeonghan shrugged. “It slipped my mind, I guess,” he sighed, shuffling closer to Minghao’s warm chest. Physically, they probably couldn't get much closer. “I don't talk to my parents that often, and it's just never come up.”

 

Minghao scoffed into Jeonghan’s hair. “Of course it hasn't come up. Why would your parents randomly ask you if you've had a child recently? That wouldn't make any sense.” 

 

Well, no, that wouldn't make any sense, but Jeonghan couldn't think of anything else to divert the conversation from the topic of his parents. 

 

“You know, now that I think about it,” Minghao shifted, lifting Yeona higher onto his arm and detaching his other from Jeonghan’s scalp. “I've never heard you mention anything about your parents. Is there a reason why you haven't?” 

 

Minghao had that look in his eye that told Jeonghan he was going to pry the truth out of him even if it hurt. But Jeonghan didn't want to give into the awkward conversation, or the heavy air surrounding them. He wanted to hunker back down into Minghao’s shoulder, and never leave there.

 

“No reason,” Jeonghan tries retreating back into Minghao’s warmth, but the younger boy simply slides away from him. “Minghaaao..” Jeonghan whines. But Minghao’s face was serious, stern, and it reminded him of his grandmother's when she scolded him for playing in her garden. 

 

“I've told you my sob story,” Minghao retorts, repositioning Yeona after she slid from the move to the other side of the couch. “Now, you can tell me yours. If there is one, that is.” He was laying on the couch now, legs spread over Jeonghan’s thighs comfortably.

 

Jeonghan was not comfortable in the slightest. 

 

“There's no sob story,” Jeonghan began, shoving at Minghao’s calves to direct them away from his pelvis. “I just don't talk to my parents very often.”

 

“Don't you think  _ now  _ would be a good time to start talking to them more often? Especially since they have a  _ granddaughter _ now?” Minghao was pressing all his buttons, and Jeonghan was trying his hardest not to dig his fingernails into the other boy’s skin. 

 

“Don't you think that they would  _ want  _ to hear from their  _ son?  _ I know you're an only child, Jeonghan, so you can't just leave it up to your siblings to call and check up on them,” Minghao was slowly leaning closer to Jeonghan, folding his legs up beneath him as he did so. Had his daughter not been in Minghao’s arms, Jeonghan would've pushed him off the couch by now. Or ravished him with his lips, and torn his clothes from his lithe body. One of those things. 

 

“How long are you going to wait? Until Yeona is one? Until she's three? You can't hide her from her  _ family,  _ Jeonghan. She deserves to have her grandparents in her life, even if you don't want them in yours,” Minghao was only a few inches from his face at this point, and kept glancing down at Jeonghan’s face to take in the flush that colored his cheeks. Minghao lifted an eyebrow and smirked in a way that Jeonghan  _ wished  _ didn't make his stomach flip. 

 

Minghao was making a lot of good points, and Jeonghan was listening for the most part. He realized that the issues he had with his parents were something he needed to figure out- should probably see a therapist about in all honesty -and were not to joke about. But Minghao was just so  _ attractive  _ like this. 

 

Jeonghan willed his skin not to sweat, and his eyes not to wander to Minghao’s pillow-like lips. He prayed that his body controlled itself until he could take care of his  _ issue  _ later, in the shower, with freezing cold water bringing him back to his senses. 

“Don't you think you should call them, Jeonghan?” 

 

And just like that, the intensity of the moment was gone. Minghao’s voice was back to being soft, understanding, and gentle- the voice you would use to coax a kitten to come towards you. Jeonghan resented his duality. 

 

“Y-Yeah,” his fingers fumbled into his back pocket where his phone was. “I'll call them right now.”

 

~

 

“Hi, mom.. I'm okay, yeah. No, I just wanted to tell you something. Nothing bad.. really  _ good,  _ actually.. Mhmm.” Minghao watched Jeonghan tap his fingers nervously against the counter, his other hand balanced on Yeona’s stomach to keep her upright. Minghao smiled, turning back to the stove. 

 

“Mom, are you sitting down? Yeah, you should be. No, mom- I  _ want  _ you to sit down,  _ please _ . Seriously. Yes, seriously! Mom, I'm not being dramatic-” Minghao tried to muffle his laughter. Jeonghan was be a  _ little  _ dramatic, but he had come to expect that. 

 

“Okay, you're sitting on the couch… no, I don't need  _ photo evidence _ . Just-  _ listen _ very closely. You have to believe me, okay? And call grandma once I hang up.  _ Please,  _ god, don't make me tell her, too.” 

 

“I'm getting there! Listen, listen,  _ listen.  _ Okay. So, do you remember that girl Dani that I told you about when I was in college?” 

 

There was a pause, and Minghao held his breath. 

 

“Yes, okay. Remember me telling you that I slept with her once?” Minghao turned around to see Jeonghan wincing at an invisible pain, which he assumed was his mother gagging into the phone. 

 

“I am almost thirty years old, and I have sex, mother… That's not the point-  _ listen.”  _

 

Yeona was laying her head back on Jeonghan’s chest now, and Minghao had an idea:  _ his camera _ . 

 

He snuck around Jeonghan, into his bedroom, and came back into the kitchen with his camera in hand. Jeonghan still hadn't broke the news to his mother. 

 

“ _ Quit stalling. _ ” Minghao whispered into his ear not blocked by the phone. Jeonghan shivered. 

 

“Nobody, mom. Anyway, Dani. We slept together once when we were both drunk- yes,  _ drunk _ on  _ alcoholic  _ beverages. We had sex and I didn't talk to her after that- call me a sleezebag, then. C’mon, get it over with. Then you can tell me the story about your honeymoon again… Mhmm, that's what I thought.” 

 

Jeonghan sounded like his was talking to a friend, not his mother. It made Minghao smile. He turned the flash off on his camera, and reset the lighting so it wouldn't be too bright. Bringing the camera up to his eye, Minghao snapped a picture of Jeonghan, Yeona’s head resting comfortably against his chest. 

 

Jeonghan turned at the sound of the camera shutter, but quickly disregarded it. “So, I didn't see Dani again after that- we were both seniors and it was towards the end of the year… Yeah. No, I didn't. I'm  _ trying  _ to get to the point,” Jeonghan rolled his eyes, and Minghao felt the attitude radiating from it on the other side of the kitchen. 

 

“So, Dani got… pregnant… No, I had no idea. That is, until she dropped a baby off at my doorstep a few months ago.” Jeonghan was wincing again, and Minghao thought he heard a high pitched scream come from the receiver. He snapped another picture. 

 

“Dani was never meant to be a mother- didn't want to be. I was going to take the baby to the adoption agency but… I just couldn't, mom. I just couldn't.” Jeonghan was gazing down at Yeona, thumb making small circles on her tummy. He was obviously in love with his daughter, and Minghao thought it to be apparent to anyone who saw them. 

 

“She's mine- I took a DNA test the first week she stayed with me,” Jeonghan was smiling again. He took the phone away from his ear, turned on the speaker, and sat it on the table, beckoning Minghao over. “Her name is Yeona, mom. She's almost six months old, and she looks just like me. She's gorgeous.” 

 

Minghao took a seat at the table, quietly, so Jeonghan’s mother wouldn't notice the disturbance. “Oh, my  _ god _ , Jeonghan. You're a  _ father?  _ You're a father, Jesus Christ Almighty.” Ms. Yoon’s voice sounded a lot like Jeonghan’s to Minghao’s ears. Her accent was a bit thicker, but Minghao could tell that her tongue was comfortable with English. 

 

“You're a grandma,” Jeonghan was still smiling as he looked up to meet Minghao’s eyes, a silent tear dripping from his own. “There's someone else I want you to meet, mom.” “Oh, dear lord. You don't have twins, do you?” Jeonghan huffed out a laugh.

 

“No, not twins. I took care of Yeona pretty much by myself for about two weeks before I realized that I would need a babysitter for her when I was at work. Mingyu recommended-” “Mingyu! I love that boy! Is it him? Is he the babysitter?” 

 

Minghao smiled at Ms. Yoon’s enthusiasm. He hoped that he wouldn't disappoint her too much by not being Mingyu. “No, but it's a friend of his from college. His name is Minghao. He was an infantile nurse at the hospital on the other side of town, but was looking for a new job. He's living with us now, and he takes care of Yeona during the day.” Jeonghan nodded towards Minghao, and he cleared his throat. 

 

“Hi, Ms. Yoon! I'm Minghao. It's great to finally meet you! I'll take care of your son and granddaughter well.” Minghao bowed subconsciously, and Jeonghan chuckled at him. “Well, hello Minghao. You can call me Sumin, dear. I trust that you'll take care of Yeona and Jeonghan. I'm sorry that we had to meet when I'm such an emotional mess.” Minghao muffled a laugh into his hand, and left Jeonghan to talk to his mother after muttering a quick goodbye. 

 

Minghao carried Yeona off to her room, changing her into her pajamas so they could all eat dinner together. “How do you think that went, Yeonie?” He asked the baby, laying her gently onto the changing pad. “I think it got some weight off of Daddy’s chest, if nothing else. He needed to tell your grandma. Don't you think?” Yeona was wide awake now, eyes big and alert, listening intently to everything Minghao said. 

 

“Hopefully, you'll get to see your grandma soon. I'm not sure about your grandpa, but I don't know much about him. That's okay, though. You've got your Daddy, me, Josh, and Gyu. You have enough men in your life, Yeonie.” Minghao wrapped the baby up in a clean diaper, and fastened the onesie together. 

 

“Ready to eat?” he asked, smiling at Yeona. She was only six months old, but she really did emote more than any baby Minghao had ever seen. “Me too, princess.” 

 

Before Minghao could make it into the dining room, he paused in the hallway to listen to the end of Jeonghan’s conversation. 

 

“She  _ adores  _ him, momma…  I'm only a little scared,” Scared? What did Jeonghan have to be scared about? Minghao had never seen him express any sort of fear towards him, and it was obvious that they were talking about  _ him _ .

  
“Why? Wait ‘til you see him, mom. You'll know why… He's just the kind of person that everyone falls in love with…  _ Including me _ .”

 

~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did you think? let me know!! i love reading comments :) 
> 
> come yell at me on twitter or cc: @gyuquartz
> 
> thank you for reading! have a lovely day/night!
> 
> ~ cj ♡


	11. Part Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello!! this is early, but i felt really bad abt the cliff hanger lol
> 
> enjoy!!! 
> 
> ~ cj ♡

  “She hasn't been to the doctor?!” 

 

“She seemed fine! I didn't think anything was wrong!”

 

“You said the same thing about giving her a bath!”

 

“Well, she- look, I don't know what I'm doing.”

 

Minghao bit his tongue to suppress the sarcastic, “ _ Clearly” _ that so desperately wanted to escape. He could only berate Jeonghan about this for so long before the older man got upset with himself. Minghao pressed his fingers to his temples. 

 

“It's okay, Jeonghan. I'm here, so nothing would've happened to her, but she needs her shots and everything. She's six months old now, and she's more susceptible to illnesses since she hasn't had her vaccinations.”

 

Jeonghan looked confused for a moment. Minghao watched his eyebrows scrunch together, and could practically see the gears turning in Jeonghan’s head. “Can't… can't you just do that? You're a nurse?”

 

Minghao wanted to smack his head off the wall. But it was too late in the evening to make a mad dash to the emergency room if he gave himself a concussion, so he decided against it.  _ God _ , he's getting old. 

 

“No, Jeonghan. I can't do that. I'm not employed by the hospital anymore, so I can't administer vaccines.” 

 

“Oh… Well, can you tell me who to schedule an appointment with, then? I'm not sure what all she needs.” Minghao nodded, and allowed the gentle smile to slip back onto his face. 

 

“Come sit on the couch with me. I'll explain everything now so you won't freak out at the appointment.”

 

~

 

        Jeonghan wasn't accustomed to do many women smiling at him. Well, not really him- they were smiling at his daughter, and, by default, him. It creeped him out. He mentioned this to Minghao, but only received a firm pat on the shoulder, and, “Women always smile at babies. Don't worry, they won't steal her.” 

 

Jeonghan was not convinced. 

 

“Yeona Yoon?” a female voice called into the waiting room of the pediatric unit. Yeona had recently begun to recognize her name, and her attention went to the door immediately. Jeonghan rose from his seat, followed by Minghao, and they were led into a small observation room. It felt claustrophobic, too tight, and Jeonghan wasn't enjoying it at all. 

 

“Relax,” Minghao laid a comforting hand on his thigh, thumb carding over the fabric there. “It'll be okay. You know everything they're going to do.”

 

“I know,” Jeonghan’s grip around Yeona’s waist had tightened significantly since they entered the room, and he had no intentions of letting go any time soon. “I'm just nervous. What if something's wrong with her?”

 

“Nothing is wrong with her, Jeonghan. If anything, the doctor is going to be amazed a what good health she's in having never been to the doctor.” 

 

“What if she's overweight?” 

 

“There's really no such thing as ‘overweight’ for babies. Some babies are just fat. Yeona happens to be one of them.” That comment earned Minghao a light smack to his hand, but Jeonghan tangled their fingers together right after. Minghao’s hand still rested on the other's thigh, and Jeonghan was significantly more calm. 

 

A knock sounded from the other side of the door, and Jeonghan jumped. Minghao found a little too much joy in the way Yeona’s expressions mirrored her father's- she was the most dramatic six-month-old Minghao had ever seen. 

 

“Hello! I'm Dr. Hwang, but you can call me Stephanie if you'd like. Is this Yeona?” Dr. Hwang was very obviously a pediatrician to Minghao’s trained eye: she was bright, bubbly, and looked as if she was made to handle children all day long. 

 

Jeonghan pulled his hand away to lift Yeona up to Dr. Hwang with an unsure smile, and Minghao laid his palm back down on his thigh. “Are either of you her biological father?” Dr. Hwang asked. Yeona pushed away from Dr. Hwang’s chest a bit, and glared at her through her long eyelashes. Dr. Hwang cradled Yeona in her arms expertly, but Minghao still had the urge to pull the baby from her grasp and hold her against his chest. He couldn't help the pride that swelled in his belly when Yeona turned towards him and reached out. 

 

“I am. This is Minghao, by the way. He's Yeona’s caretaker while I'm at work.” Jeonghan muttered, motioning to Minghao. “I apologize, but I can't tell you much about her mother.” He held Minghao’s hand down against his thigh, not allowing him to take Yeona from the doctor. 

 

“It’s nice to meet you, Minghao. And that's okay! As long as she didn't have any severe health issues, there shouldn't be a problem. Does your family have a history of health problems, Mr. Yoon?” Dr. Hwang continued talking as she laid Yeona down on the scale. “I don't think so. My mother and I are both farsighted though, so she might have vision problems.”

 

“We’ll get her checked out,” Dr. Hwang smiled over her shoulder as the scale beeped once. “18.5 pounds, and 26.0 inches long. You have a chunky girl on your hands, Mr. Yoon!” Minghao caught Jeonghan’s eye and smirked. He  _ loved  _ that Yeona was chubby. 

 

Dr. Hwang sat Yeona up on the table, supporting her back with one hand, and shining a light into her eyes and ears with the other. “Everything looks normal.” she mumbled, more to herself that to Jeonghan and Minghao. Yeona was still glaring at Dr. Hwang from the corner of her eye. Minghao stifled his laughter. 

 

Dr. Hwang took the rest of Yeona’s vitals, and handed the baby over to Minghao-  _ finally  _ -seeing that she was reaching for him. Minghao placed a kiss on the baby's head. “You're doing so well, princess.” Jeonghan mumbled beside him, finger clutched in Yeona’s chubby hand. 

 

“If one of you would like to have a seat on the table so you can hold her, one of the nurses will be in with her vaccinations soon. She'll be getting six today.” Both men visibly winced at the number of shots. Dr. Hwang left them alone after wishing them well, and encouraging Jeonghan to schedule a nine-month appointment. 

 

The door clicked shut and neither of them moved. Minghao hated giving shots to children during his time at the hospital- in fact, he cried after the first three times of doing it.Vaccines had never seemed like anything more than a needle stick- a routine occurrence -to Minghao, but he  _ knew _ that Jeonghan’s mind was racing at the moment. He knew that Jeonghan needed comforting more than he did. 

 

And he was right. Minghao glanced over to his left, forcing himself out of his thoughts, and saw that Jeonghan’s knuckles were turning white, his fingers slotted together over Yeona’s tummy. 

 

“Hey,” Minghao began. He laid his palm at the back of Jeonghan’s neck, fingers combing through the short hair there. Jeonghan relaxed a bit under his touch, and Minghao grinned. “She'll be okay. If I see the nurse doing anything wrong, I'll stop them. I'll hold her while they're giving the shots if you want.”

 

Jeonghan nodded quickly, planting a kiss on top of Yeona’s hair, and handed the baby over to Minghao. “Hi, princess. We're doing a lot of moving around today, aren't we? You're gonna sleep  _ so _ well tonight.” Jeonghan chuckled at that comment, hand wrapped tight around Minghao’s bicep. 

 

There was another softer knock on the door as Minghao was situating himself and Yeona on the table. “Hi, guys, I'm-” 

 

“Seungkwan?” 

 

“Minghao?”

 

“You two know each other, I assume?” 

 

Seungkwan strided over to Minghao, hugging him tightly from the side to avoid squishing Yeona between them. “Jeonghan, this is Seungkwan. He and I were roommates in college!” Jeonghan held out his hand and smiled politely, quietly observing Seungkwan. He was small bit broad, and had a smile nearly as bright as Seokmin’s. Seungkwan, like Dr. Hwang, looked like he really belonged in his line of work. “Jeonghan Yoon. It's nice to meet you. Sorry, I'm a little nervous.” 

 

Seungkwan chuckled at Jeonghan, moving to the wall for a pair of gloves. “No worries! Parents are usually more nervous than their kid the first time. I'll try to make this as painless as possible for all of you.” Seungkwan gave a sincere smile to both Jeonghan and Minghao, and leaned down a bit to look at Yeona. 

 

“Hi, hun. What's her name?” he asked no one in particular. “Yeona.” Minghao and Jeonghan chorused, smiling at each other afterwards. “Well, Yeona. I'll do my best to make this easy for you, okay? Could you take her clothes off for me?” Jeonghan stood to do so, but before he could, Minghao took his hands in his own while Seungkwan’s back was turned. 

 

“It's okay,” Minghao whispered. He pressed a soft kiss to Jeonghan’s hand. “She's in good hands.” 

 

“I know she is.” Minghao’s fingertips tingled underneath Jeonghan’s lips as he pressed them to his knuckles. Seungkwan turned back around, and Jeonghan stripped Yeona of her clothes. 

 

“Could you put your hands over her arms for me? We'll do the three in her thighs first.” Minghao nodded, and wrapped his forearm around Yeona’s torso, leaning her back into him. He pressed his lips to the back of her head, and soothed his thumb over her skin. 

 

“Little pinch, Yeona.” Seungkwan snapped his fingers away from the baby’s face to draw her attention elsewhere. Minghao recognized the trick- he had picked it up during his time in the hospital as well. For him, however, it never really worked. Babies were easily distracted, but their minds were immediately drawn to sudden pain. 

 

And Yeona was preoccupied with Seungkwan’s fingers long enough for him to get two shots done. As he disposed of the needle and took the third syringe into his gloved hands, Yeona screamed. 

 

Minghao’s heart shattered. He tightened his grip on Yeona’s arm, pulling her closer to him, and shushing her quietly. Minghao looked over to see Jeonghan holding back tears, one hand covering his mouth, the other clutching at the hem of his shirt. 

 

“It's okay, baby girl. Daddy's right here. You're okay, princess.” Minghao rocked Yeona back and forth, holding her legs down with his free hand while Seungkwan gave him a regretful glance. 

 

Minghao knew that he needed to stay strong for Jeonghan and Yeona. He knew that babies take notice of the emotions of the people around them, and react accordingly. He knew that he should've held back his tears, and saved them for tonight when he was alone in his bedroom, emotions woven into a tight ball. 

 

But tears were  _ streaming  _ down Yeona’s face- tears of actual  _ pain _ , not just frustration or discomfort. Pain that Minghao felt very responsible for right now, and he was sure Jeonghan felt the same way. 

 

No, he was  _ positive  _ Jeonghan felt the same way. The older man looked as if he was physically restraining himself from reaching out for his daughter, while also doing his best to keep from hyperventilating. Minghao wanted to hold his hand, tell him it's okay, that Yeona’s okay, that it doesn't hurt that badly, it's just a  _ new  _ pain. 

 

But none of that matters when it's  _ his  _ child that's experiencing the pain. No amount of medical knowledge or sterile technique could make Minghao feel better at the moment. He trusted Seungkwan to do everything correctly- trusted him enough to take his eyes off of the needle in his hand, in fact -and he  _ knew  _ that Jeonghan would easily trust someone who Minghao openly trusted. 

 

That didn't stop Minghao from wanting to bury Yeona’s face in his chest, hold her close, and protect her from any harm the world might bring. 

 

Minghao’s little family would surely all be sleeping together tonight. 

 

_ Wait.  _

 

_ His what? _

 

Seungkwan injected the sixth and final shot into Yeona’s upper arm, and Minghao hardly even blinked. He placed another soft kiss on Yeona’s temple. “You did so well, princess. Daddy’s so proud of you.” 

 

Jeonghan practically ran towards the two of them, enveloping them both in his embrace. His hand fell rhythmically through Minghao’s hair, and Minghao finally allowed himself a silent tear. 

 

“Let's go home.” 

 

~

 

      Minghao was right: the three of them all slept in Jeonghan’s bed that night. He had refused to let his daughter out of his sight since they left the doctor’s office, and was hesitant to even put Yeona in her high-chair to eat dinner. So, when Jeonghan proposed that “Evening Cuddle Time” be moved into his bedroom, Minghao happily agreed.

 

He expected it to be much more awkward than it was. Minghao and Jeonghan slipped into bed easily, Yeona resting against her father’s shoulder, eyes heavy with sleep. Minghao leaned back against the headboard. “Yeonie,” he began. The baby was beginning to recognize her name, so Minghao had taken to saying it more often. That, and, he loved making up new nicknames for the little girl. 

 

“Since we finished  _ Winnie The Pooh _ , I got you a new book. Do you wanna read that tonight?” They had finished  _ Winnie The Pooh _ about three nights ago, and Minghao had made up stories since then. But yesterday, he and Yeona went to run errands, and he picked out another book for her. It was another one that he remembered reading when he was young, and also, a book he vowed to read to his children when he had them. 

 

For now, Yeona was his child, and she deserved to hear the story of  _ The Giving Tree _ as much as he did as a child. 

 

“ _ There once was a tree… and she loved a little boy…”  _

 

~

 

       Minghao laid awake that night, lost in thought, but also thinking frighteningly clearly. Jeonghan had fallen asleep some time after Yeona, claiming that the baby had the right idea of not sleeping until Minghao read to her. He was out like a light, leaving Minghao to lay on his side of the bed, blanket tucked under his chin, Yeona in her bassinet beside them. 

 

Jeonghan laid tantalizingly close to Minghao, their forearms touching through the blanket, their knees bumping against one another, and their breaths mingling together. Minghao wished that he could turn his back towards Jeonghan, wished that he had the willpower to turn to his side, not look over his shoulder, and not feel the need to reach out and touch Jeonghan. 

 

His face was too peaceful, too perfect, and Minghao couldn't help but think that everything was going too well. Something was going to break the peace between the three of them, and Minghao prayed that if something bad had to happen, it happened to him instead of Jeonghan or Yeona. 

 

Minghao watched Jeonghan’s eyes flit back and forth beneath his lids, felt his toes twitch under the blanket, heard his breath stutter in his sleep. Jeonghan was a restless sleeper, but Minghao expected him to toss and turn more. Nonetheless, he was glad he didn't. It gave Minghao a chance to look at him without a pair of eyes looking back.

 

Minghao uncurled his hand from within the blanket, reached out, and laid his palm on Jeonghan’s warm cheek. He had lost weight in the past few weeks, and Minghao was trying so hard to cook food that was high in calories to get him back up to a healthy weight. His cheekbones stretched the skin tight over his face, his eyebrows needed plucked, his lips were chapped, and his skin was dry in the same place as always. So, why did Minghao still find Jeonghan so  _ stunning? _

 

He had come to an agreement with himself during the car ride home: he could  _ not  _ call himself Yeona’s father. He wasn't her father, and didn't want to confuse her by saying that. Calling himself “Daddy” in a moment of desperation in the doctor’s office didn't matter. Kind of. 

 

Another thing was that Minghao absolutely  _ could not  _ refer to Jeonghan and Yeona as his family. Just because his life had felt incomplete and empty before doesn't mean than he can claim someone else's family as his own. He had no right to do that. 

 

So what if Jeonghan and Yeona made him feel like a better person? So what if Minghao wished that Jeonghan and Yeona were his own little family? They weren't, and he couldn't change that. 

 

But, what Jeonghan said the other night to his mother… That was definitely…  _ interesting.  _

 

Unless, of course, they  _ weren't  _ talking about him, and Jeonghan has a secret boyfriend who Yeona already calls “Daddy”. That's a realistic possibility. 

 

“You're thinking too loud,” Minghao nearly jumped out of his skin when Jeonghan spoke. He didn't even notice the twitching stopped. “What's on your mind, Hao?” Jeonghan’s eyes were wide now, but Minghao could only tell because of the artificial lighting of the alarm clock on the nightstand. Still, Jeonghan’s eyes looked like the night sky. 

 

_ Why?  _

 

“Just worried about Yeonie,” he lied. Well, not completely. Minghao was always a bit worried about Yeona, but she wasn't his main concern at the moment. “Today was a little tiring.” 

 

“You're telling me,” Jeonghan grinned, and Minghao felt something loosen in his gut. Guilt, maybe. “As soon as I realized you were reading a Shel Silverstein poem, I knew I would be knocked out in ten minutes flat.” Minghao chuckled, and Jeonghan laced their fingers together underneath the comforter. 

 

“Thank you for everything today. I know that you didn't have to do any of that, but I really really appreciate it,” Jeonghan brought their hands up between them, and pressed small kisses to Minghao’s knuckles. “I really appreciate  _ you _ . And… I heard what you said to Yeona. When she was getting her shots?” 

 

Minghao’s body went rigid. His insides were trying to escape the confines of his body, while his limbs tried to escape the confines of the bed. Jeonghan shushed him quickly. “Hey, hey, calm down. I'm not mad. I understand that you probably said it in a moment of panic. It's okay, Minghao. It's okay. We're okay,” Jeonghan clasped both his hands around Minghao’s, and spoke with his lips against them. Their faces were too close, too hot, and Minghao wanted to  _ run.  _

 

“But if you want her to call you something like that, can it not be ‘daddy’? I just don't want her to get the two of is confused when she starts talking. Which will be soon, I assume.” Jeonghan was still smiling, but Minghao only felt mildly soothed. What if he overstepped some unspoken boundary and Jeonghan was going to kick him out? What if Jeonghan only wanted him in Yeona’s life until she was able to differentiate between faces and voices, and then he would leave? What if-

 

“Minghao,” Jeonghan kept his right hand laced with Minghao’s left, and brought the other up to card through his hair. “Stop thinking. I'm not upset. Not even a little bit. I would've done the same thing if our positions were switched. I don't want Yeona to see you as an uncle, or a friend of mine, or even  _ her  _ friend,” Jeonghan’s voice sounded watery, but Minghao couldn't tell if his eyes were the same. “You've known her almost as long as I have. If anyone besides me has the right to call themself her father, it's  _ you,  _ Minghao.”

 

Minghao was speechless. Over a month later, Jeonghan’s kindness, generosity, and forgiving personality still stunned him into silence. He felt tears welling behind his eyes. 

 

“Can…” he breathed in once and exhaled slowly, putting his mind at ease. “Can we talk about this tomorrow? I don't know what to say right now.”

 

“Of course, love. We don't even have to talk tomorrow if you don't want to. Or the next day. Or even this week. Whenever you're ready, you tell me. Okay?” 

 

“Okay.”

 

Jeonghan pulled Minghao close, wrapping one leg around his hips, and both arms around his waist. “Let's cuddle.” he whispered. Minghao never rejected an offer to cuddle. 

 

A few minutes later, Minghao’s nose was pressed into the dip of Jeonghan’s throat, his arms folded up against his chest, and one leg slotted between both of Jeonghan’s. They'd never laid like this before, but Minghao was positive that this was his favorite view of Jeonghan. 

 

Soft lips moved against Minghao’s forehead, and he felt the words that Jeonghan spoke into his skin: 

 

“ _ Yeona loves you. And I do, too.”  _

 

_ ~ _

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what did you think? let me know!!  
> come yell at me on twitter: @gyuquartz
> 
> thank you for reading! have a wonderful day/night! ♡
> 
> ~ cj ♡


	12. Part Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i'm so sorry this is late, but i've been having some family issues recently :( i took some time to focus on my family, but i should be updating regularly from now on! thank you for waiting ♡
> 
> this is kinda just a filler chapter, but still reveals a lot about the characters! pls enjoy! 
> 
> ~ cj ♡

Sumin Yoon was a very exuberant woman, who couldn't hide anything because it all showed on her face. Her excitement was contagious, and Minghao found himself seeing pieces of Jeonghan in her appearance and mannerisms: her smile lines, though deeper than her son's, filled out her cheeks, and accentuated the soft curves of her eyes. Her hair was dark, and her eyes shared the same shade of brown, but had a certain lightness to them- as if she was looking into the sun. Minghao had never noticed, but Jeonghan’s looked the same. 

 

She stood with her hip cocked to the side the same way Jeonghan did; she gesticulated with her hands the same way Jeonghan did; she picked at her fingernails the same way Jeonghan did. It was a bit exhausting for Minghao to watch the two interact.

 

Sumin was also very small in stature, but what she lacked in height, she made up for in personality. She practically flung herself into the apartment, arms flailing, motioning for Minghao to take the grocery bags from her hands, and shouting something in Korean. Minghao could only make out Jeonghan’s name.

 

Later, he learned that she said, “Jeonghan, bring my granddaughter to me before I die of old age!” Minghao was very amused by Sumin.

 

Ms. Yoon wore a simple, white, flowing sundress, bright red lipstick, and a necklace with an enormous ruby in the center of the charm. Jeonghan really did resemble her. Minghao couldn't see any characteristics about Jeonghan that didn't belong to his mother first. Even the way she dressed- not overdone, but just gaudy enough to draw attention -reminded him of Jeonghan. 

 

Sumin had only come to visit them, and had brought along enough groceries to keep the fridge stocked for weeks, as well as lots of things for Yeona. Clearly, the little girl was going to be spoiled by her family now that they knew about her.

 

_ Good, _ Minghao thought,  _ It's what she deserves. _

 

~

 

        “Minghao, why don't you tell me about yourself, dear? I'm curious about you.” Sumin had insisted on putting the groceries away, feeding Yeona, and cooking dinner. Now, they all four sat at the dining room table, eating steamed vegetables and tender steaks. It seemed that the only thing Jeonghan didn't inherit from his mother were her cooking skills. 

 

Minghao looked over to Jeonghan, but didn't see any sort of panic or signal that he shouldn't tell Sumin about himself, so he proceeded. “Well, I moved to the U.S. when I was younger. My parents started having issues when we first moved here, and got a divorce pretty soon after. I took a year off school to take care of my little sister while my mom got herself back into the right state of mind. I graduated at the top of my class in high school, and majored in Infantile Nursing in college. After graduation, I worked at the hospital nearby until Mingyu told me about Jeonghan needing someone to look after Yeona.” 

 

Sumin’s face truly did reflect every emotion she felt during Minghao’s story, but he found it endearing. Jeonghan smiled at him, but his attention was soon drawn to Yeona; the baby was kicking her feet in the high chair, mumbling something, and reaching towards the spoon in her grandmother’s hand. “Someone's impatient,” Sumin mused, bringing the spoon up to Yeona’s lips. “Just like your father.” 

 

Minghao was relieved that Yeona was taking to solid foods so well. In some cases he'd seen, babies rejected anything solid until they were eight or ten months old. Of course, Yeona loved to eat, so he didn't think solid foods would be an issue for her. 

 

“What do you mean by that?” Jeonghan asked, looking playfully at his mother. Sumin mirrored his expression. “I mean that you loved to eat, too. You still do,” She smiled, and Jeonghan did the same. However, his was directed at Minghao. Sumin turned back towards Yeona, spooning more mashed potatoes in her mouth, but her eyes widened as if she had an idea. 

 

“Minghao, dear, have you ever seen any of Jeonghan’s baby pictures?” Sumin was smiling a little devilishly at her son, while Jeonghan groaned and looked like he wanted to bury his face in his own mashed potatoes.

 

“Mom,  _ why?”  _

 

“I just figured he was curious as to why Yeona is so chubby. She gets it honest, you know.”

 

“Of course  _ I know.  _ You've never let me live it down,” Jeonghan reached towards Minghao, pulling him closer with a hand around his neck. “She keeps my baby pictures  _ on her phone _ . That's how often she embarrasses me like this.” Minghao could only laugh. 

 

“Look, Minghao,” Sumin held her phone out to him, and Minghao saw what he could've mistaken as a photo of Yeona. Jeonghan was  _ definitely  _ chubby, more so than his daughter, and had the same tuft of black hair at the top of his head. Jeonghan looked to be about a year old in the photo, and was wearing a yellow t-shirt, baby jeans, and sneakers. The thing that Minghao found most adorable were the glasses strapped around baby-Jeonghan’s head. 

 

“Wasn't he precious? I wonder what happened.” Sumin took her phone back from Minghao, and received a light shove from Jeonghan. “I'm just teasing you, love,” But Jeonghan was already pouting- arms crossed over his chest, bottom lip puckered, the whole shabang. “You know you're still adorable.” Sumin pinched her son's cheek and pulled, but Jeonghan batted her hand away before she could leave any marks on his skin. 

 

Minghao could tell that Jeonghan wasn't actually mad, a little embarrassed, yes, but not angry. It was going on 7:00pm, though, and Yeona was getting fussy. “You should probably head home soon, mom. I don't want you driving all the way back late at night.” Jeonghan was picking up their plates and silverware and setting them in the sink. Minghao scooped Yeona out of her high-chair and peppered her face with kisses. Sumin huffed beside him, and leaned closer to her granddaughter. 

 

“He thinks I'm an old woman, and can't see after dark.” She mumbled, placing a kiss on Yeona’s cheek. Jeonghan said something in Korean, and Sumin laughed before responding to him. Jeonghan walked over to where Minghao was standing with Yeona on his hip, her head falling against his arm. 

 

“Go ahead and get her ready for bed. We can do the dishes later after mom leaves. Okay?” Jeonghan kissed his daughter on the forehead, and Minghao nodded. Before Minghao could turn to tell Sumin goodbye, Jeonghan’s hand came to rest on the back of head, and pulled him down a bit before pressing his lips to Minghao’s forehead. 

 

Minghao felt his cheeks burning, knew that his ears were turning red, and was  _ very  _ aware that Jeonghan’s mother saw that. If he wasn't completely sure, the grin on her face confirmed it. 

 

Minghao cleared his throat, jostling Yeona from her drowsy place on his arm. “Goodbye, Ms. Yoon. It was really nice to meet you.” He smiled, and took Yeona over to her grandmother. “It was lovely to meet you, dear. I trust you to take care of my family. Especially my son,” Sumin pulled him into a tight embrace, whispering, “I've never seen him act the way he does around you. He's  _ infatuated _ , but he won't move any further unless you visibly reciprocate his feelings. Have you  _ seen  _ the glasses he wears? He's  _ blind _ , Minghao. Take good care of him.” 

 

Jeonghan watched them the entire time, trying to read his mother's lips, or see why Minghao was chuckling under his breath and nodding along with Sumin. To say he was confused was an understatement. Jeonghan’s mother knew him well, and her speaking with Minghao so quietly made him nervous for more reasons than one. 

 

It made him nervous because she could read him like a book, and she knew  _ everything.  _

 

~

 

          For the first time in what felt like years, Jeonghan was completely caught up on work, the cabinets were stocked with groceries, and the house was clean. He sat on the padded window ledge, glasses falling down his nose and a blanket wrapped around his legs,  _ finally  _ getting back to a novel he'd abandoned months ago. 

 

It was around 4:30pm, and Minghao laid down with Yeona for her last nap of the day. They'd been playing with the baby since midday, and they were all tired. Jeonghan, however, could not take daytime naps. It messed with his sleeping schedule at night, and he didn't want his schedule to affect Minghao and Yeona. 

 

Jeonghan had also developed a habit of waking up at night and simply watching Yeona sleep. She was falling asleep much easier as of late, but still wouldn't rest unless Minghao read, sang, or talked to her. Jeonghan had began speaking to her in Korean occasionally, translating simple words from English in a funny voice. He really just loved to see Yeona’s gummy smile. 

 

Dr. Hwang gave them a list of milestones Yeona would be reaching within the next few months, and Minghao took great pleasure in checking them off as she met them. 

 

“She's already cutting teeth, Jeonghan! And she's hardly cried at all! Do you understand how rare that is?” Minghao would exclaim. Jeonghan was unabashedly proud of his little girl, and beamed anytime Minghao commented on what a good baby she was. 

 

Jeonghan smiled just thinking about it. He hoped Yeona and Minghao were both sleeping peacefully. 

 

Maybe he would check on them in a little while. 

 

For the time being, he read comfortably by the slowly fading daylight, waiting a bit impatiently for his daughter and Minghao to wake.  

 

~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what do you think about jeonghan's mom? i'm curious! thank you for reading, and, again, i'm sorry this was so late. 
> 
> you can follow me on twitter for fic updates & daily ravings abt svt: @gyuquartz
> 
> have a wonderful day/night! 
> 
> ~ cj ♡


	13. Part Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise! since i was gone for so long, i decided to update sooner for you guys! this chapter is a mix of everything and i didn't plan any of it beforehand, so i apologize if it seems a little sporadic. i know what i'm doing, i think
> 
> anyways, enjoy & thank you for reading! 
> 
> ~ cj <3

“You'll have a test over this on Friday, so don't misplace your notes! I didn't make extra copies!” The final bell of the day rung through the school, and Jeonghan’s students prepared to bolt out of the classroom. He smiled as they wished him goodbye, quickly gathered their belongings, and left the room in a flourish. 

 

Jeonghan was erasing the whiteboard when a knock came from the doorway. “Mr. Yoon?” One of his students, a boy named Samuel, peeked his head into the classroom. Jeonghan had Samuel in class for the first time this year, but hadn't gotten a chance to talk to him much. He knew the boy was rather shy, but very bright when it came to things he enjoyed. Samuel was young, only in the 10th grade, but was taking Jeonghan’s advanced classes. 

 

“Hey, Samuel. Can I help you with something?” Samuel stepped tentatively into the classroom, wringing his hands together nervously. “I just had a question. Are you… Could you help me with something?” Jeonghan raised an eyebrow, and motioned for Samuel to have a seat. 

 

“It depends on what that  _ something _ is. If it has to do with science, I can probably help. Classical music is a no, though.” Jeonghan attempted to lighten the mood, but Samuel looked as nervous as ever. “What about… just a life question in general? Advice, I guess.” Samuel picked at the skin around his fingernails, and Jeonghan noticed his fingertips were red with irritation. Whatever this was, it was really bothering Samuel. 

 

“Of course. But first- as your teacher, I have to tell someone if you're in any sort of danger. Okay?” 

 

“Oh, no, it's nothing like that. I'm just a little confused,” Samuel shook his head, but didn't hold Jeonghan’s gaze for long. “Mr. Yoon, you're… you're gay, right?” 

 

Well, that's not what Jeonghan expected. Still, he had no issue talking about such things with his students. He nodded. 

 

“Bisexual, but it's all relatively the same for me. Why do you ask?” Samuel’s eyes flitted anxiously around the classroom, and came to a stop on a diagram of the Milky Way galaxy. “How did you know?” he asked. Jeonghan could see his eyes tracing the lines of the diagram, following the arrows pointing to different stars and planets. Samuel reminded him a lot of himself. 

 

“I didn't. Not really, anyway. It wasn't something that ever really occurred to me until it caused a problem, and that wasn't until I was in college. I just wasn't interested in anyone- boys or girls -until everyone else around me was. You can ask Mr. Kim. He and his horndog friends dragged me to parties and stuff, and I didn't know I liked  _ anything  _ until I tried it. I wouldn't recommend that, though.” 

 

Samuel was grinning down at the desk in front of him, and Jeonghan felt a little weight lift from his chest. “Will you tell me why you're asking, Samuel?” The boy stuttered a bit before he was able to explain. “Because my best friend kissed me, and it made me really confused.” 

 

“Ah! This is something I can help with!” Jeonghan exclaimed. Samuel nearly jumped out of his seat. “The same thing happened to me when I was your age. My best friend, Seokmin, was really confused about his feelings. He was dating this girl at the time, and couldn't figure out why he didn't want to kiss her. He just didn't want to. So, I proposed the idea that maybe he was gay, and he said, ‘Well, how do I find out?’ and the most obvious answer was to kiss a guy. I was the only guy available at the time, so.” Jeonghan shrugged, but Samuel looked like he was focusing intently. 

 

“Were you guys still friends after that?” he asked. “Of course! We're still friends now. He was my first kiss, though, so it makes for a funny story,” Samuel bit into his bottom lip, thinking for a moment. Jeonghan sighed. “Samuel, the best advice I can give you is to not overthink things. Know yourself well enough to stop your thoughts before they become toxic.” 

 

Samuel nodded, and looked content with that advice. He quickly thanked Jeonghan before running out of the room, calling a name down the hallway. 

 

     The following day, Samuel rushed into Jeonghan’s classroom a few minutes before the first bell signaled the start of the day. Jeonghan lost count of how many times Samuel thanked him. 

 

~

 

     In the evenings, when one of them was between bites of dinner, or occupied with something else, Jeonghan and Minghao would take turns recounting their day to Yeona. The baby had been even more expressive lately, and usually always smiled when one of them spoke to her. She even smiled at the mention of Joshua and Mingyu. No matter what or who she was smiling about, Yeona’s gummy grin made Jeonghan’s heart warm. 

 

“So, Yeona, I need your advice on something,” Minghao snickered from the other side of the kitchen where he was occupied with the food on the stove. “You're the most non-biased person here, so you should be able to give me a solid opinion, yeah? Okay, so, yesterday, one of my students comes into my classroom at the end of the day, looking all fidget-y and nervous. You with me, kid?” Yeona was babbling away, but all her attention was on her father. 

 

“Great. So, this is the first year I've had this kid in class, and he's in advanced classes, too, but I don't know him super well, and he didn't give any reason for my attention to be drawn to him. Still, I understand why he came to me for advice on this certain thing,” Minghao was listening now; he'd turned down the heat on the burners to hear Jeonghan’s story more clearly, and the clicking of a spoon against metal had seized. 

 

“I tried some dad jokes to lighten the mood, but he didn't seem to care for them,” Minghao gagged a little. “He was still nervous. Eventually, he asked me for advice on something kinda personal. First, he asked if I was gay, which is a pretty normal question, but I'd never been asked by a  _ student _ . It kinda caught me off guard. I told him I'm bi, but, you know, p _ o _ tato pot _ a _ to. It's like that one apron Minghao has,” 

 

“Don't make fun of my apron.” Minghao smacked Jeonghan on the back of the head with a wooden spoon. “ _ Ow!  _ Jesus, I'll actually make fun of it if you keep  _ assaulting me  _ with kitchen utensils!” Yeona giggled at the two men bickering, which had then cooing instantly.  _ God, they're so soft.  _

 

“ _ Anyway _ , after I told him that, he said that he was really confused because his best friend kissed him. Now, this is where I became helpful! See, when I was around sixteen, my best friend, Seokmin, kissed me because he couldn't figure out why he didn't like kissing his girlfriend, and he thought kissing me would someone solve that problem, which it  _ didn't,”  _ Jeonghan exhaled and Minghao chuckled. 

 

“You're getting too old for such long-winded stories.”

 

“Hush, I'm almost done.”

 

Jeonghan took a breath and continued, “I want your honest opinion, Yeona: do you think it was right of me to give such personal advice to a student?” Jeonghan really didn't expect an answer from his daughter, but possibly from Minghao. Instead of a response, he felt arms wrap around his shoulders from behind. 

 

Minghao’s breath was hot against Jeonghan’s neck, and he tried to stop a shiver from coursing through his spine. “I think you did the right thing,” Minghao whispered. His arms wound themselves around Jeonghan’s chest, and soft lips ghosted over the shell of his ear. “Even if you don't think so as a teacher. It sounds like this boy was really conflicted. I can understand what he's feeling.” 

 

“What do you mean?” Jeonghan asked, bringing his hands up to wrap around Minghao’s wrists. Minghao exhaled next to his ear, and Jeonghan could feel the smile on his lips. “I mean that I had the same issue when I was that age. Figuring out my sexuality and all that.” The timer on the stove blared and Minghao squeezed Jeonghan’s hands once before letting go. 

 

Jeonghan went to the cabinet to get two plates, silverware, and Yeona’s baby spoon and plate while Minghao sat food on the dining table. This was something else they’d developed a system with: meals were very orderly since Minghao planned meals one week at a time. He said that meal planning was his way of staying in control of his life when he first graduated- he found peace in the order of things, or something like that. It sounded fake to Jeonghan, but he wouldn’t dare argue with Minghao when it came to food. 

 

Today was Wednesday, which meant pasta of some sort because Minghao never felt like packing Jeonghan’s lunches this late in the week, and always made a lot of food so he could just eat leftovers. Jeonghan would never complain about pasta at any time of day. Tonight was chicken alfredo baked ziti, and Jeonghan wanted so badly to disregard all manners and dig in, but Minghao wasn’t even seated yet. 

 

Once he was seated, Yeona’s bib was secured, and the food was distributed,  _ then _ Jeonghan dug into his plate of pasta. As usual, it was delicious, and Jeonghan thanked whatever god blessed him with Minghao. 

 

~

 

Yeona had taken longer to fall asleep that night. For some reason, she whined whenever Jeonghan or Minghao sat down to rock her to sleep, which led to them taking turns walking around the apartment, bouncing the baby on their shoulder, mumbling soothing words. (‘Soothing words’ in Jeonghan’s dictionary were anything said in a gentle voice. He was just begging his daughter to sleep.) It was 10:30, and they had already given Yeona a bath, and repeated their entire nightly routine about three times trying to get the baby to sleep. 

 

Jeonghan was currently in the kitchen trying to finish the dishes while Minghao took a turn trying to calm Yeona. She wasn’t even crying, she was just staring up at Minghao with big eyes that showed no sign of being even remotely tired. He made his way over to the windowsill and took a seat on the padding, laying Yeona down in front of him. It was a little cooler near the window, so Minghao put a blanket between Yeona and the glass. 

 

The moment her back met the fabric of the bench, Yeona’s cheeks bunched up and her bottom lip puckered. Minghao almost laughed at the baby’s face, but reached out to poke her cheeks instead. “Hush, princess,” he mumbled, carding his fingers through the thin layer of hair covering her head. It was dry by now, but still soft from the bath. “Do you want Hao to sing to you?” Yeona’s whimpers came to a stop, and her face smoothed out a bit, and Minghao took that as a yes. 

 

“What should I sing, Yeonie?” Minghao had only sang to the baby a couple times, and he’d sang the same song each time: a Chinese lullaby. It seemed to do the trick, so he figured it was worth a try. He scooped Yeona into his arms and stuck a pacifier into her mouth. She didn't immediately spit it out, which was a good sign. All the lights in the living room except one lamp were turned off, so Minghao settled himself and Yeona into the recliner and turned off the lamp. Once Yeona finished squirming, Minghao began to sing: 

 

_ My little baby, baby _

_ I give you something sweet _

_ To let you sleep well tonight _

 

_ My little devil, little devil _

_ Teasing you about your looks _

_ To let you like this world _

 

_ La la la la la, my baby _

_ When you're tired, someone will be there with you _

_ La la la la la, my baby _

_ I want you to know you're the most beautiful _

 

_ My little baby, baby _

_ I give you something sweet _

_ To let you sleep well tonight _

 

_ My little devil, little devil _

_ I pinch your little face _

_ To let you like all of tomorrow _

 

_ La la la la la, my baby _

_ When you're lonely, there are people missing you _

_ La la la la, my baby _

_ I want you to know you're the most beautiful _

 

_ You're the most beautiful to me _

 

~

 

Jeonghan sat at the counter, head pillowed in his hand, eyes focused on his daughter and Minghao resting in the recliner together. Yeona had fallen asleep after some gentle coaxing and singing from Minghao, and the boy had joined her soon after. The scene before him now was definitely the most endearing thing Jeonghan had ever seen: Yeona was curled up against Minghao’s chest, her hands fisted in his shirt, the pacifier hanging from her lips. Minghao’s arms were wrapped securely around the baby, and his cheek laid against his shoulder. 

 

Minghao was always a peaceful person; his skin was always free of wrinkles, his eyes always twinkled, he was without worries. At least, that’s what Jeonghan thought. Now that Minghao’s face was completely relaxed, his limp body being swallowed by the big chair, his hair falling over his eyebrows- now, Jeonghan saw how tense the boy was during the day. Jeonghan had a constant nagging in his stomach that he felt would only disappear if he kissed Minghao, and that feeling intensified ten times just watching the younger boy sleep with Yeona in his arms. 

 

Jeonghan made his way over to the recliner as quietly as he could. As much as he hated to, he pulled his daughter from Minghao’s hold, and was pleased to see that neither of them woke when detached from each other. Yeona grunted and shifted in Jeonghan’s arms as he entered her bedroom. He smiled and kissed Yeona’s forehead after placing her into the crib. 

 

“Love you, princess.” he whispered, shutting the door behind him. 

 

Even though Jeonghan really wanted to be cheesy and cute and manly, he seriously doubted he would be able to lift  _ and  _ carry Minghao to his bedroom. Instead of embarrassing himself, Jeonghan settled for running a hand through Minghao’s hair, tugging slightly until Minghao groaned and stretched. Jeonghan kept his hand rooted in Minghao’s hair, listening carefully to all the small sounds Minghao made as he woke. Jeonghan was a damn  _ goner.  _

 

“What time is it?” Minghao asked. His voice rumbled deep in his chest, and Jeonghan broke out of his  _ impure thoughts.  _ “About 11:30. I put Yeona in bed, and was going to do the same with you, but I doubt I could carry you the way I carry her.” Minghao grinned, and Jeonghan’s stomach did a somersault. “You should be in bed, too, you know,” Minghao mumbled, rubbing a fist into his eyes. “Yeah, yeah.” Jeonghan dismissed him, offering a hand to lift him from the confines of the recliner. Minghao took his hand, pulling himself up to his full height, standing chest to chest with Jeonghan. 

 

“Do you wanna take a shower before going to bed?” Minghao asked. He and Jeonghan alternated between taking showers at night and in the morning, so it wasn’t that odd of a question, but it threw Jeonghan off, nonetheless. Something about Minghao’s hooded eyes staring down at him, the heating system humming through the walls the only sound aside from their breathing, the light filtering in from the kitchen. The air felt too heavy, Jeonghan’s chest felt compressed, and he was absolutely positive that Minghao was leaning closer to him, gaze fixed on his lips. 

 

Jeonghan was going to let it happen. He was going to kiss Minghao right there in the middle of the living room at midnight on a Wednesday. There was no reason for him not to. 

 

Except there  _ was _ . 

 

“I’ll shower in the morning,” Jeonghan took a step away from Minghao, tried not to see the flash of hurt cross his features, but the light from the kitchen was just enough for him to see it. “You should get to bed.”  Minghao cleared his throat and straightened up. His hands were hovering where Jeonghan was standing a moment ago, lost now that their home had moved away. “Y-yeah,” Minghao stuttered. Jeonghan hated himself for this. “Goodnight, Jeonghan.” 

 

Minghao pushed past him, and Jeonghan felt his heart break. 

 

No, he wouldn’t have a good night.

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> come scream with me!!!!! :D   
> the lullaby hao sings to yeona is "baby" by zhang Xuan c:
> 
> follow me on twt for fic updates & daily ravings abt svt @ gyuquartz
> 
> thank you for reading! have a wonderful day/night!
> 
> ~ cj <3


	14. Part Fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GOD this took me 846789 years to write & i'm so so so so sorry!!!! i rewrote this four (4!) times before i was happy with it, so i hope you like it!
> 
> thank you for reading & enjoy!!
> 
> ~ cj

Everything was the same. 

 

Jeonghan still woke up too late in the morning, and Minghao still insisted on making breakfast and packing his lunch. Yeona was still bubbly and carefree, blissfully unaware of the tension between her two caretakers. Minghao had taken to showering in the evening right after Jeonghan arrived home, mumbling, “Welcome back,” and thrusting Yeona into his arms before retreating to his bathroom. Minghao still read to Yeona each night before bed, and Jeonghan still rocked her back and forth, listening to the lull of Minghao’s voice, but not appreciating it like before. 

 

Everything was the same. Except it wasn't. 

 

Jeonghan woke up later than he used to, not wanting to get out of bed, feeling like a high schooler all over again. His body was too heavy to be roused so early in the morning, and now he had to  _ shower  _ because Minghao avoided him by showering in the evening. Minghao still made breakfast, but he didn't sit down to eat with Jeonghan any more. Instead, he sat on the couch with Yeona, feeding her quietly, and listening to the lady on the 7:00am news drone on and on. Yeona was too little to notice, but Jeonghan knew she could tell that the atmosphere in the home was different. She woke three or four times a night, simply wanting to be held, and would only fall asleep if both Jeonghan and Minghao were in the room with her. 

 

Jeonghan noticed small changes: Minghao’s demeanor, the way he normally spoke to Yeona, everything about him, seemed subdued. He did everything as if he was on autopilot. Jeonghan assumed this was what Minghao meant the time he explained clinical detachment to him: “You have to separate yourself from the patient. You can’t see them as a being with any significance. If you do, you’re more likely to mess up because you got your own emotions involved. Being emotional is extremely looked down upon in the medical field.” Minghao said clinical detachment was something he alway struggled with whenever treating patients. Jeonghan was beginning to think that he was improving that skill.  

 

On a Tuesday, almost two weeks after the incident, Jeonghan had finally had enough. He sat in his classroom with Mingyu during their lunch hour, going over his plan out loud with him. Throughout their friendship, Jeonghan had dumped his feelings in front of Mingyu plenty of times, and listened while Mingyu did the same. It had been awhile since they’d last sat down and just cried together, and Jeonghan figured they were overdue. As soon as Jeonghan brought up the reason for his attitude- Minghao, as expected -Mingyu let out a loud  _ whoop!  _ and proceeded to punch Jeonghan in the shoulder. 

 

“That’s for keeping it from me for so long. Now, spill. I have money riding on this.”

 

“You made bets on my love life?” Jeonghan rubbed his sore shoulder and narrowed his eyes at Mingyu. The bastard just smiled smugly and responded, “Your love life is gonna pay half this month’s rent, so you better finish this story within the hour so I can collect my winnings.” 

 

Despite being a little upset about Mingyu making bets on his life, he still needed someone to tell him if his plan was completely hopeless, and Mingyu wouldn’t withhold anything from him.

 

Jeonghan only cried a little bit that day.

~

 

Jeonghan purposely arrived home early on Friday. In order to have a real conversation with Minghao, he needed to catch the boy off guard, and this was the only way he could think to do it. Jeonghan kind of felt like a piece of shit for doing it this way, but the overwhelming feeling of  _ longing _ towards Minghao was worse. Marginally worse, in fact. 

 

He arranged it seamlessly; Joshua agreed to watch Yeona for the night (he always did, but he  _ really  _ did after Jeonghan explained his plan- “ _ Finally!  _ I'm so tired of seeing you two walk on eggshells around each other.”), and Jeonghan had been browsing Pinterest for recipes since Tuesday. It was going to be perfect. 

 

Over the past few weeks, Minghao had begun going grocery shopping on Fridays- another tactic to avoid Jeonghan at all costs. Knowing this, Jeonghan texted the boy around 10:00am, and told him to drop Yeona off at Joshua’s when he got home. 

 

**from: minghao**

**> why? is everything okay? **

 

**to: minghao**

** < fine! i just have something you and i need to take care of :)**

 

**from: minghao**

**> okay??**

 

Jeonghan couldn't remember the last time he was this nervous. His first year of college? No, he was too cocky then. His first job interview? No, his first job was at an ice cream shop, and he didn't interview for it- he charmed his way into it. His first date? A close second, but no. 

 

No, this was a completely different kind of nervous feeling. This felt like a bee buzzing around in his chest, knocking against his lungs, and swooping between his ribs. This felt like a watermelon was growing in his throat, closing his airway, and flowering into his gut. He hadn't felt this way since Yeona came into his life. But, with Yeona, also came Minghao. 

 

And his thoughts were back to Minghao- always back to Minghao. Jeonghan drummed his fingers against the wooden surface of his desk,  _ praying _ for his lunch hour to begin soon. There was too much unnecessary noise in his classroom: feet tapping on tile, pencils rhythmically hitting desks, papers shuffling, careless fingers tapping on phone screens. His students were antsy, but doing worksheets always made them that way. He felt bad for giving them something just to keep them busy, but he knew how high schoolers work: one of them will do the worksheet, and then send the answers to everyone else. Maybe not in this particular class, but in his others, that's what happened. Jeonghan didn't have the patience to reprimand his students about it. 

 

“Mr. Yoon?” Jeonghan’s fingers came to a stop, his other hand dropping from where it rested against his cheek. “Yes, Luca?” Luca was another of Jeonghan’s favorite students. She was extremely smart, but quiet most of the time. She only really began to come out of her shell when she tutored younger students. Jeonghan knew she would make an excellent teacher, and had written her letter of recommendation with as much excitement in his words as possible. 

 

“Are you all right? You seem a little… skittish.” Jeonghan chuckled, and sat up to look at his watch once again. “You think so? I swear, I thought clocks only moved slow when you were a  _ student _ . It's not fair that they do the same thing when you're a  _ teacher. _ ” Luca grinned at that, looking up at the wall clock. Jeonghan adjusted his cardigan, and began gathering his things. “Have somewhere to be?” Luca inquired. Jeonghan raised an eyebrow; his students seemed more curious these days. “Just some unexpected family issues. I'm leaving after this class is over.”

 

Luca’s mouth formed into an ‘o’ shape as the bell rang to signal lunch time. She smiled over her shoulder at Jeonghan, walking quickly to catch up with her friends. “Have a good weekend, Mr. Yoon! I hope everything goes well with your family!” 

 

Jeonghan needed all the hope he could get. 

 

~

 

Before any explaining is done, you must understand one thing: Jeonghan is not cut out for this. He is not cut out for romantic dinners, candlelight illuminating the table, and butterflies in his stomach. He is not cut out for preparing an  _ edible  _ meal and presenting it to the person he  _ may _ have an enormous crush on. He is not cut out for cleaning his entire apartment in the span of 25 minutes, waiting for the chicken and vegetables to finish baking, and realising that Minghao keeps the place pretty spotless. 

 

Jeonghan is not cut out for relationships, but that thought leaves his mind the moment he hears a pair of keys jingle outside the door. Minghao’s soft voice floats through the air, intended for only Yeona’s ears. Jeonghan curses his good hearing. 

 

“I wonder what your daddy has planned for tonight, Yeonie. I'm actually really nervous. But it'll be okay.” Jeonghan straightened himself up, and pretended to wipe off the counter when Minghao entered, startled. “Oh, you're here. You're early.” Jeonghan did his best to smile, but Minghao looked so  _ tense _ just because he was here. This was going to be a very long, and very uncomfortable evening for both of them if they kept this up. 

 

“Yeah, I'm here.” 

 

“You… What are you doing?”

 

“Nothin’.”

 

“Uh huh… I'm just gonna… get some stuff together and take her to Josh’s.” Minghao was  _ smirking _ at him, and Jeonghan prayed for his insides not to combust just for this evening. After that, his guts could splatter themselves against the wall, release all the butterflies they held captive, and he would be perfectly fine with it. 

 

“‘Kay.”

 

Minghao rounded the corner to Yeona’s bedroom, and Jeonghan wanted to smack his head off the wall. “‘ _ Yeah, I'm here’?  _ What kind of  _ illiterate _ idiot am I now?” Jeonghan whispered to himself, gripping the bridge of his nose between two fingers. “Did you say something, Jeonghan?” Minghao called from the other room. 

 

“Nope! Nothing at all!” 

 

This would be the night Jeonghan would embarrass himself to death, he just knew it. 

 

~

 

“So. What's all this for?” Minghao sat his fork down on his plate, and lifted his eyes to meet Jeonghan’s. He smiled when he found the older man already staring back at him, eyes wide, dumbfounded, if anything. It was 6:04pm, Jeonghan didn't expect that question to come up until  _ at least  _ 6:30, and he was completely unprepared to answer it. “Well, uh,” he began, turning his gaze back to the broccoli he was trying to avoid. Minghao loved broccoli for some reason.

 

“I wanted to talk about the other night. And I wanted to do something nice for you.” Minghao’s face fell, and Jeonghan wanted nothing more than to lift his chin up and kiss his cheeks. Instead, he held a piece of broccoli up to Minghao’s lips. 

 

Jeonghan was almost positive he wouldn't take it just because of the nature of their conversation, but he did. Minghao’s lips lifted the tiniest bit and Jeonghan felt like he actually had a chance at making this work. “Well, thank you. I really appreciate this,” Minghao dabbed at his lips with a napkin, and cleared his throat. “There's really not much to talk about when it comes to  _ that _ , though. I know that what I did was wrong, and I apologize for that. I've just been trying to give you the space I thought you wanted.” 

 

Jeonghan nearly choked. Minghao seemed so…  _ okay  _ with how their relationship was right now. Jeonghan had no idea how to make him see that it wasn't  _ okay _ with him. 

 

“Minghao, no, t-that’s not it-” The scraping of the chair against the tile prematurely cut off Jeonghan’s words. Minghao stood to take his plate to the sink, rinsing off the leftover sauce before laying it in the sink. “Then what is it? I misjudged your feelings, and my own, and I'm trying to put some distance between us to make it more comfortable for both of us.” 

 

Jeonghan just gaped at Minghao’s words. Of all the times that Jeonghan was able to read Minghao’s features so easily, why did he choose now to close himself off? There was something unreadable in Minghao’s eyes, but Jeonghan knew the only way to open him up was to piss him off. He tried that first.

 

“Is that really how you feel?” Jeonghan asked. Frustration and anger always sent Jeonghan’s voice into a lower pitch without his consent, and he saw Minghao flinch a bit at the change. “I don't know, Jeonghan,” Minghao sucked in a deep breath, and Jeonghan decided that the smile on his face right then was his least favorite thing. Minghao looked exhausted, fed up, and ready to blow. It made Jeonghan want to cower, but he stood his ground, ready to question Minghao further if he still didn’t let go of whatever was holding him back. Minghao chuckled deep in his throat and released the air he was holding.

 

“I've only known you for a few months, so there's no way for me to justify my feelings! I hardly know you, Jeonghan! All I know for sure is that I love your daughter, and I would never want to hurt her,” Minghao laughed humorlessly, and Jeonghan felt his stomach churn at the sound. A sound that defeated was never meant to make its way past Minghao’s lips.

 

“The only conclusion I can come to is that you and Yeona feel like the family I've _always_ wanted. The one I wanted for my own family, for my mother, my sister. You make me feel things that I shouldn't be feeling after such a short period of time, and I _don't_ _fucking understand,_ Jeonghan,” Minghao’s eyes were tearing up at this point, but all Jeonghan could see was a sad little boy, confused because his family wasn't the way it used to be. All the pain, disappointment, and confusion from his childhood was resurfacing, but Jeonghan let him go.

 

Minghao was laying his heart down in front of him, and Jeonghan was trying  _ so hard  _ to understand, but he needed more information than what Minghao was giving. So, he pushed harder. 

 

“That's what you think puts a limit on feelings?  _ Time?  _ Something as made up as  _ time _ ? Minghao, time isn't real! Time doesn't matter!” Jeonghan was surprised by how steady his voice was. He didn’t have it in him to really yell at Minghao, but he could definitely piss him off enough to make him open his eyes to see what was right in front of him. “You've known me for as long as my own  _ daughter _ has, but do you think she loves me or you any less because of it? Do you think that Yeona will wait until she's known us for a year or two to be  _ sure  _ that she loves us?”

 

“She's a baby, Jeonghan! She doesn't think that way!” Now, Jeonghan was standing, dropping his plate into the sink, and marching towards Minghao. He planted himself right in front of the boy, and saw all the fury that was building in Minghao’s eyes. He just needed one last push to fully understand what Jeonghan was trying to convey.

“Did you know that whenever I can't sleep at night, I get up and talk to her? I tell her about my parents, everything they went through together, and how it made us a stronger family. I tell her about myself, my life, and all the mistakes I've made that have put me where I am today. But, every time I go to her room, I make sure to tell her about  _ you.  _ I tell her how much you adore her, how much she means to you. I tell about what you like to eat, why your favorite color is orange, the reason why you read  _ The Giving Tree  _ to her twice a week, your irrational hatred of toe-socks, that you're scared of thunderstorms, and you're always cold. I tell her that you own more clothes than any person I've ever seen, and that you look  _ stunning  _ in every single thing you wear, no matter how hideous it looks on a hanger. I tell her that you’re the most genuinely kind person I’ve ever met, and that you love everyone and everything so much that it hurts. I tell her that you’re an empath, and you feel things so deeply that it overwhelms you. I tell her that I get lost in your eyes sometimes because I can  _ see you _ through them, and you can't hide anything because your eyes give it away. I tell her that I wish I could be closer to you,” Minghao’s breathing had picked up through Jeonghan’s entire tangent, and a few tears had escaped his eyes, but he still seemed frustrated. 

 

“I could go on and on about you, Minghao, and I've only known you for a few months. Do you really think  _ time  _ matters to me?” 

 

Minghao was crying, and Jeonghan just wanted to wrap him in his arms and carry him to bed. He wanted to tell him everything he loved about him, everything that caught his eye, everything that made him  _ deserve  _ to be loved. He settled for wiping a tear from his cheek for now. 

 

“B-but what about Yeona? She'll be so confused if I ever leave.” 

 

“Then don't ever leave. Simple,” Minghao’s smile was watery, but it was  _ there _ . Jeonghan leaned down to kiss the tears from his cheeks. “You don't have anything to be afraid of,” One kiss beneath his eye to catch a tear before it fell. “I'm not going anywhere,” Another to catch the tear trailing down his cheek. “You're not going anywhere,” One along his jawline, just to feel him shiver because of it. “And we are going to make this work,” Another kiss below his ear to whisper comforting words into it. “I promise.” 

 

Minghao’s hands made their way to Jeonghan’s hips, fingers trembling, gripping onto his shirt. Jeonghan laid a trail of kisses down his neck, sucking at his pulse point, and tasting the salty tears that had been there before his lips. “Jeonghan, I-” Minghao’s hands slid over his back, pulling at his shirt, forcing him to look up. 

 

What Jeonghan saw was so much better than he expected. Minghao’s tears were gone, replaced by something that looked like disbelief mixed with an emotion Jeonghan had never seen in his eyes. Minghao’s breathing came back to a normal pattern, his fingers crawling up the expanse of Jeonghan’s back, and they just stared at each other. Jeonghan was enamoured.

 

“Can I  _ please  _ kiss you?” Minghao whispered. 

 

Jeonghan was happy to comply.

 

~  

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;)
> 
> comments are appreciated!! you can also come yell at me for this on twitter if you'd like: @gyuquartz
> 
> thank you for reading! have a wonderful day/night! <3
> 
> ~ cj


	15. Part Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! i apologise for this chapter taking so long- ao3 wouldn't let me upload it for some reason :(( 
> 
> enjoy! 
> 
> ~ cj ♡

Kissing Jeonghan was something Minghao had been trying to stop himself from imagining for a while. Now, he planned to make a habit of it. Minghao assumed before that Jeonghan would be an incredible kisser just because he had so much more practice than Minghao, but this was different. Jeonghan was such a profoundly emotional person, but held it all inside until he bursted- whether he bursted into tears, harsh words, or something else, Minghao never liked to see Jeonghan burst. If he had to guess, Minghao figured bursting the way he did was a new habit of Jeonghan’s. 

 

He'd explained how he handled stress in college to Minghao: “Sex, Hao. No emotions, no attachments, just sex. It's really not a good habit to have, but I didn't care when I was younger. I like to think that I'm smarter now.” And Minghao completely understood why Jeonghan would do something like that- it was compliant with his character. Minghao thought it was a miracle that he made it out of college with his virginity still intact, but he understood Jeonghan’s coping habits. 

 

Knowing that, Minghao expected that Jeonghan was practiced in kissing, sex, and all that stuff. What he did not expect, however, was for Jeonghan to be so  _ gentle.  _ He didn't expect the slow glide of Jeonghan’s lips over his, the soft hum in the back of Jeonghan’s throat when he slid his tongue between their lips, or the smile spreading over Jeonghan’s features mirroring his own when they pulled away. Minghao’s hands were restless, and his cheeks felt tight from smiling, but he was so,  _ so  _ happy that it didn't matter. Jeonghan’s fingertips smoothed up over Minghao’s arms, and came to rest on his cheeks. 

 

“I'm sorry I doubted you. I know that you wouldn't come to a decision like this without thinking about all the possibilities.” Jeonghan’s thumb tapped Minghao’s cheek, and his eyes focused back on his lips, watching him speak. “I know. I've thought about this a lot, and I don't wanna move into anything too quickly and confuse Yeona,” Minghao’s fingers made small circles on Jeonghan’s hips through his shirt, and he took a deep breath before meeting the older’s eyes again. “Would it be okay if we just kinda ease our way into this? I don't wanna be just another person you've slept with…” Minghao’s voice lost its volume towards the end of his sentence after seeing the look on Jeonghan’s face. “Why would you be _just_ that?” he asked, fingers winding behind Minghao’s ears. Minghao shrugged. 

 

“Minghao, you can think about this for as long as you want. You deserve that,” Jeonghan’s eyes turned soft again, his lips curving back into a smile. “I just want you to know that your feelings are  _ not  _ one-sided, and that I would be more than happy to call you  _ mine _ .” Jeonghan placed a short kiss on Minghao’s lips before pulling away, tapping him on the nose, and saying, “Get to bed soon. Even angels need their beauty rest.” Jeonghan threw a smug smile over his shoulder that left Minghao dazed and confused, eyes shuffling around the kitchen underneath the light of the stove. 

 

~

 

Jeonghan hardly ever received any mail other than the usual junk mail, or letters from bill collectors. He didn't have subscriptions to magazines or anything, and getting a package larger than the standard envelope was rare. None of these things crossed Jeonghan’s mind until after he entered his apartment, sat the mail down on the dining room table, and went over to greet Yeona and Minghao on the couch. Jeonghan planted a loud smooch on his daughter’s cheek, and gave Minghao an equally obnoxious one just because he loved hearing the two of them laugh. 

 

They were still taking things slow, but Jeonghan was completely fine with it; he didn’t push Minghao’s boundaries, and only did what he knew the boy was comfortable with. It was calm, and Jeonghan enjoyed the simple touches he and Minghao shared. He reveled in the feeling of not being obligated to do anything more than give Minghao a peck on the cheek, a hug at the end of the day, or a kiss on the forehead. He didn’t push Minghao for more, his feelings were reciprocated, and- even though Jeonghan had no idea where they stood intimately -he was extremely happy with the arrangement.  

 

It wasn’t until later when the three of them were in the kitchen together- Jeonghan opening mail at the table, Yeana chewing on one of her teething rings, and Minghao refusing to let Jeonghan help cook -that Jeonghan noticed the odd manila envelope. The return address was somewhere in Nevada, but Jeonghan didn’t think anything of it. What he was concerned about was the weight of the thing- it had to be at least seven or eight pounds. It wasn’t flimsy the way letters normally are, and it felt solid, like it was filled to the brim with paper or something. Jeonghan unclipped the top of the envelope, and dumped the contents on the table. He shuffled through the paper confusedly. Inside, were pictures of people Jeonghan didn’t recognize, and what looked like medical records. He sat those aside, and pulled out what looked to be a handwritten letter.

 

Jeonghan wished the letter would’ve stayed buried in the pile:

  
  


Jeonghan, 

 

I know you’re probably very confused. I thought for a long time about whether or not I should write this letter, and finally gathered the courage to, so I hope you’ll read it all the way through. 

 

I made a mistake. A huge, huge mistake, that I can never redeem myself for, and I feel terrible. For the past few months, my guilt has driven me mad. I’m depressed, angry, and I feel like I’m not whole anymore. I wasn’t ready to be a mother, but I am one because of you. you have to understand, Jeonghan. 

 

I know that Yeona was an accident, and she came into your life when you were least expecting it, but it was wrong of me to drop her off to you that night. I panicked, and didn’t know what else to do. The reason I’m writing this letter is not to tell you that I’m sorry; you know that I’m sorry. I’m writing this letter to tell you that, in my mind, what happened the night we created yeona wasn’t a mistake. 

 

I had this weird infatuation with you all year leading up to that night. I can’t believe you never noticed! We had mutual friends, we went to all the same parties, we ate lunch in the same place. All of that, and you still never spared me a second glance. Looking back at it now, maybe it all was just alcohol and lust that night for you, but it wasn’t for me. For me, it was kind of a dream come true. I knew that I’d probably never get a chance to be with you again after that, so I did everything I’d always wanted to do that night. 

 

I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable, but I needed you to hear the truth. I still have feelings for you, Jeonghan. You made me a mother, even though I gave up our daughter to you. I guess what I’m asking is for you to give me a second chance. I want to be the mother Yeona deserves, and be the partner you deserve. We can adopt yeona together, move in together, and be the happy family I know you want. Please think about it.

 

In this envelope, I’ve enclosed photos of my family- your family now -for you to show to yeona. I’ve also mailed some of my medical history to make it easier for her doctors if she has any issues. I hope they’re helpful.

 

Please contact me here if you want to discuss anything: xxx-xxx-xxxx. Please think about this, Jeonghan. I want to be in our daughter’s life. I want to be in your life.

 

Yours, 

Dani

  
  


“Hey, are you okay?” Jeonghan barely registered Minghao’s words in his ears. He could hardly feel the warm hands on his shoulders, he didn’t acknowledge the letter being pulled from his grasp. His mind was panicked, eyes flickering back and forth between the letter and the photos beside it. Men, women, children he didn’t recognize now had a face and a family; they had a niece, a granddaughter, a cousin that they didn’t know because of  _ him.  _ These people had lives of their own, families of their own, hopes and dreams of their own, and Jeonghan was a part of this family now without ever asking to be. 

 

In Dani’s mind, these people were practically his in-laws, the other half of his family. Did Dani expect pictures of his family in return? Did she expect a relationship with him? A co-parenting relationship he could understand, but Dani was out of the picture, and Yeona didn’t even know her. Did she expect a romantic relationship between them? To Jeonghan, Dani was a drunken one-night-stand, and that was the end of the story. Yes, he had a daughter now because of it, but that doesn’t mean he automatically developed feelings for Dani because she made him a father. 

 

Did he have feelings for her then? No, she was all over him the whole night, was  _ asking  _ Jeonghan to have sex with her. He did, because she had a pretty face and a nice body, and he was always horny when drunk, so why not? There were no feelings attached, and that’s the kind of sex he craved in college. Did he have feelings for her now? The only person Jeonghan was absolutely, 100% positive about his feelings for was Minghao. Dani couldn’t change that with a letter, and Jeonghan couldn’t change that if he tried. He was a different person than he was in college, and Dani didn’t realize that. 

 

“Jeonghan,” Minghao spoke, laying the letter down on the table, pushing it aside with his elbow, and sitting down in front of Jeonghan. “You need to contact this woman and tell her how you feel about everything. About your relationship with her, about what you think is best for Yeona, and what would be the healthiest environment for her to grow up in,” Minghao cupped Jeonghan’s face in his palms, forcing him to meet his eyes. “If you have feelings for this woman-” “I don’t,” Jeonghan shook his head in Minghao’s hands, bringing his own up to lace their fingers together. “I never did. All that stuff she said in the letter, I-I had no idea about it. Minghao, I h-had no idea she ever felt that way.” 

 

“I know, baby, I know,” Tears made their way over Jeonghan’s cheeks, and Minghao’s thumbs chased them away. Jeonghan didn't even register the pet name, or the softness in Minghao’s voice when he said it. He was focused on the warmth of his hands, trying to calm his breathing against Minghao’s palms. Somehow, his entire body always smelled like the shampoo he used- lavender and camomile. It made Jeonghan want to sleep for days, but also forced him to come back to his senses. 

 

Jeonghan inhaled deeply against Minghao’s palm. “Have you formally adopted Yeona?” Minghao questioned lowly. Jeonghan shook his head, and Minghao forced him again to meet his eyes. “That's your first step. That way, if Dani tries anything, there wouldn't be a custody issue.” “Both what if that's not what Yeona wants?” Jeonghan’s voice was still scratching in his throat when he spoke. Minghao smiled sadly, and glanced over his shoulder at Yeona, still chewing on a toy and kicking her feet, completely engrossed in her own thoughts. Minghao pinched her thigh playfully and turned back to Jeonghan. 

 

“Why would she want anything else?” 

 

~

 

Jeonghan cried that night. He cried because he was frustrated, and he  _ knew  _ something would happen that would break the peace he had built around himself, Minghao, and Yeona. He predicted this, and still couldn't do anything to prevent it. What kind of father did that make him?

 

Earlier, Minghao made a few phone calls to former colleagues while Jeonghan fed Yeona and got her ready for bed. Eventually, he got the phone number of the nearest adoption agency that also dealt with custody disputes, and Jeonghan let out a sigh of relief before hugging Minghao tight to his chest. “You're an angel.” he whispered, hearing Minghao’s laugh rumble in his chest. “Not quite,” Jeonghan could hear the smile on his lips as Minghao’s hands came to rest on his hips. “You're just lucky it's me and not Mingyu that's here. He'd be freaking out by now.” Jeonghan pulled away from him just to see the smile scrunch his eyelids together, and his lips to spread thin with happiness. That was Jeonghan’s favorite smile. He liked to think that Minghao reserved it for him and Yeona. 

 

Jeonghan fell into bed with tears already welling in his eyes, and he rubbed at them angrily, willing them to sink back into his tear ducts, drown themselves in his irises. It felt like he'd cried enough in the past three months to fill a small swimming pool. What was  _ happening _ to him? Having a daughter did make him soft, yes, but he never used to cry this much. Really, it only began happening when Minghao came into his life. But Minghao made him happy, not sad. Right? No, Minghao made him happy, there was no doubt about that. But what about Minghao made him  _ feel _ so much that he- 

 

That was it. Jeonghan was feeling. He was feeling so much that sometimes it just bubbled to the surface, and it was exactly how Minghao explained: “Sometimes I have to take a day or two to recharge my social battery. I just- it's like a big swimming pool, okay. It's constantly being filled and drained, and filled again, and it overflows sometimes. It's like that. I feel so much that sometimes my pool overflows, and I just have to cry until it's drained again. That's why it was so hard for me to work at the hospital: I had to pretend like my pool wasn't overflowing while I was drowning in it.”

 

That was it. Jeonghan's pool was overflowing, and all this time, he'd been trying to stop it, to contain the water. But there's no use in trying to pin down water to a single spot. There's no use in trying to figure out what circumstance triggers a certain emotion. The dam will eventually break whether it's reinforced or not. Jeonghan just never realized it. 

 

And, so, he cried that night. He cried until his pool was drained of every last drop of emotion and slept soundly within the hollow walls of his empty pool.

 

~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments are appreciated! thank you for reading!
> 
> twt: @gyuquartz
> 
> ~ cj ♡


	16. Part Sixteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello! I've returned from the hell that is the last month of high school! i finally graduated yesterday, so i'm free from school! i'm sorry i made you all wait so long for an update :( i'm not abandoning this story, i promise! hopefully updates are more regular now, but pls forgive me if they aren't perfectly timed; i'm working a full time job. again, thank you for your patience, and thank you for waiting for me :) i really appreciate everyone's support! 
> 
> happy reading! ily :) 
> 
> ~ cj

The adoption agency frustrated Jeonghan. The windows were tinted just a little too dark, the tile on the ceiling was just a little too reflective, and the cushions on the couches were just a little too firm. The atmosphere of the tall building made Jeonghan want to run outside, tuck his daughter into his chest, and go home to cuddle with Minghao for the remainder of the day. 

 

But it was only 11:30am, and they had an appointment at 11:45; Jeonghan didn't have the heart to leave after Minghao had worked so hard to get them the soonest appointment. So, they sat together in the waiting area, fingers twitching and legs bouncing with nerves. Yeona was still strapped into her carseat, babbling to herself, and chewing on one of Minghao’s shirts that operated as a blanket. Jeonghan placed his palm on her tummy and took a deep breath in, closing his eyes as he did so. 

 

“Hey,” Minghao’s hand came to rest on his thigh, squeezing gently to bring his attention back to him. “It'll be okay. This is the best thing we can do.” Minghao had been stunning to Jeonghan from the moment they met, but it was moments like this- when the light reflected just right in his eyes and brought out every shade of brown; casted shadows of his lashes onto his cheeks, highlighted his cupid’s bow, struck his dark hair in just the right way, and glinted off his skin as if he was iridescent -that Jeonghan believed he was truly ethereal. 

 

Minghao was calm and speaking softly to him, fingers tracing unknown patterns into his skin, eyes watching every emotion pass over his features. Moments like this struck Jeonghan out of nowhere, and took him by surprise every time. 

 

“Jeonghan Yoon?” A female voice broke Jeonghan out of his stupor. Minghao gave him one last smile before he stood to gather Yeona’s carseat into his arms. 

 

~

 

The hallway they were led into was surprisingly dark compared to the rest of the building. Lamps stood tall on the walls, and Jeonghan heard his footsteps echo off the tiled floor. Minghao’s free hand rested reassuringly on the small of his back as they made their way to an office. Jeonghan was always grateful for Minghao’s support, but something about this felt so much different- more important, in a way. Jeonghan already knew that Yeona was his daughter,- there was no question about that -but officially adopting her felt so  _ real.  _

 

The fact that Minghao was by his side only made it sweeter. 

 

The woman's clicking heels came to a stop in front of a closed door. She knocked twice, received a mumbled “come in” in reply, and opened the door for Jeonghan and Minghao. Thankfully, Minghao’s polite mannerisms were still intact, and he offered the woman a smile. Jeonghan’s manners had flown out the window as soon as he woke up that morning. 

 

“Have a seat, gentlemen,” A different voice- more mature, but still feminine -ushered them into the office. Inside was a  _ very _ small woman seated in a  _ very  _ large desk chair behind a  _ very  _ large desk. Jeonghan nearly giggled at the sight, but stopped himself when he saw the look in the woman's eyes. 

 

_ Oh. She means business.  _

 

Jeonghan took a tentative seat beside Minghao, who already had himself and Yeona situated comfortably on the couch, and was waiting for Jeonghan to sit. Minghao smiled up at him, and reached for his hand, pulling him down beside him. Jeonghan took a deep breath and squeezed Minghao’s hand before meeting the woman’s gaze. 

 

“Well, then, I'll introduce myself first. I'm Diana Vanes, and I'll be handling your adoption process. Remind me of your names, dear?” 

 

Jeonghan froze. His eyes bulged as his brain scrambled for an answer.  _ Names? They had names? What was his?  _

 

From the corner of his eye, he saw Minghao roll his eyes dramatically. “This is Jeonghan Yoon and his daughter, Yeona. I'm Minghao- Yeona’s caretaker during the day. Sorry about him; he's really nervous about this whole thing.” Diana smiled and sat up a little straighter. Jeonghan felt some of the blood begin to flow in his body again. 

 

_ Okay, she's just a nice old lady with very scary eyes. Come on, Jeonghan, you stare down teenagers all day. You've seen worse than this.  _

 

“Oh, there's nothing to be nervous about, Mr. Yoon. I'll just ask you some questions about your daughter, her mother, and yourself to make sure you're fit to care for her. It should be fairly painless.” Minghao gave him a look, and Jeonghan could practically  _ hear  _ him saying, “ _ See? I told you. _ ” just with the raise of his eyebrows.

 

“Okay,” Jeonghan huffed. “But I might not know the answers to everything. I didn't know her mother very well, and I hardly know anything about her family. I do have some medical records, though. I'm not sure if that'll help somehow.” 

 

“Do you have the records- oh, thank you, dear.” Of course, Minghao had already pulled out the manila folder containing all the documents before Diana could even finish her question. What would Jeonghan do without him?  _ Probably die _ , he thought. Yeah, that seems pretty accurate. 

 

“There's nothing that's catching my eye,” Diana scanned over the documents, flipping through the pages quickly. Jeonghan wondered if she could actually read that fast, or if she wasn't reading at all. “I'll make copies of these and fax them to the doctor so she can have a look at them. Okay, let's go over the rules, shall we?” Minghao nodded for both of them, and dug his nails into Jeonghan’s palm, urging him to listen carefully.  

 

“Rule number one: I record all appointments so I can go back and check my notes to see if I've missed anything. This was stated in the paper you signed in the waiting room, but no one reads those, so I figured I should tell you,” Diana was correct; Jeonghan didn't read anything he signed, he just signed it. “Rule number two: I'll be writing down any details that I find important. What seems important to you might not mean anything to me, so don't be nervous about what I'm writing and what I'm not. Rule number three: Nothing you say will leave this room by word of mouth. Everything from here on out is communicated in writing between my colleagues and I. The only people I'll be communicating with regularly regarding your case is Doctor Hwang, your family doctor. Any questions?” 

 

Minghao craned his neck towards Jeonghan, and shook his head when he saw no change in expressions. “Good. Let's get this show on the road.”

 

~

 

Diana moved quickly and easily through the usually painful process of laying your life out on the table for someone else to view. There was no judgement in her responses, and Jeonghan was so thankful for it. When he explained that Yeona was the product of a drunken one-night stand, Diana only asked if he and Yeona’s mother were on speaking terms. She didn't scold him or ask if there was a prior relationship. Jeonghan felt much safer in the small room knowing that he could explain his situation without being criticized. 

 

The few times that Jeonghan did catch a flicker of something in Diana’s eyes, she had glanced down to his and Minghao’s joined hands and grinned. The “something” he saw seemed to be happiness. He hoped it was. 

 

After the question portion of the appointment was over with, it came time to fill out paperwork. 

 

Being a teacher, Jeonghan was very familiar with paperwork. That didn't mean he enjoyed it. Diana handed him a stack of paper to read over and fill out at home, along with a business card. “Call that number if you have any questions, or think of anything else important. You can also email me if I'm not in the office,” Diana smiled sweetly down at Yeona. The baby was awake now, and looking around the office curiously. Minghao slid the visor down on her carrier so she could see a little more. Diana extended a finger towards Yeona, caressing her cheek gently, a look of pure affection in her eyes. 

 

“I hope you're able to give this little one the life she deserves.” 

 

~

 

Jeonghan would’ve groaned, but the last time he did, it earned him a flick on the forehead from Minghao. He wasn’t allowed to groan in his own house now, apparently. In his mind, Jeonghan thought this situation required a fair amount of groaning! Sprawled out between the two of them was the mountain of paperwork they were slapped with upon leaving the adoption agency. Jeonghan’s own daughter had the audacity to laugh at the noise her father releasing when the mountain was thrust into his chest. “This is all for you, kid,” Jeonghan sighed and looked down at Yeona in her carrier- she was laughing at her father’s antics, and Minghao was trying to suppress his giggles, as well. Being annoyed was useless; Jeonghan knew he would read and sign one million papers for these two. 

 

And now, because he was a  _ weakling _ , Jeonghan was spread eagle on the carpet with a pen in one hand, and Minghao’s fingers tangled in the other. Whenever he got bored, or the words on the endless papers began to blur, Jeonghan would turn onto his side and play with Minghao’s fingers. Minghao was one of those weird people who could write perfectly without holding the paper in place, and Jeonghan was amazed by it. Just watching him write helped refocus Jeonghan’s mind, but this time, it didn’t want to refocus. He just wanted to lay here- his shoulder was digging into the carpet, Yeona’s snoring echoing from the baby monitor by his head, and his limbs were getting stiff from being in this position for so long, but he didn’t have the energy to move -and stare at Minghao forever. 

 

It was like one of those compilation videos on YouTube that’s supposed to relax the viewer. Watching Minghao was like that. The tendons flexing in his arms when he flicked the the tail of the “a” in his name, the rhythmic drum of his fingers against Jeonghan’s hand, his eyes scanning over a page quickly and fluidly- all of it was hardly there, but it was a sensory overload for Jeonghan. Just being in Minghao’s presence was overwhelming sometimes, but especially now. Now, when it was quiet and it was just the two of them, Jeonghan felt like exploding. 

 

“You okay?” Jeonghan hadn’t even noticed Minghao drop his pen and turn to face him. He nodded into the carpet and brought Minghao’s hand up to his lips, pressing small kisses onto his fingers. “Just tired, I guess.” Minghao grinned, pulling Jeonghan closer. “You’re not  _ just  _ tired,” One arm wrapped around Jeonghan’s waist, the other untangling their fingers to wrap them into Jeonghan’s hair. “Something else is on your mind. I can tell.” Jeonghan rested his head on Minghao’s shoulder and buried his face in his chest. How he still smelled fresh and clean after such a stressful and sweat-filled day was a mystery to Jeonghan. Minghao tugged at his hair, combing through the knots that formed over the last few hours of laying on the floor. Jeonghan felt some of the tension fade from his body as the knots untangled. 

 

“What’s on your mind?” Minghao’s voice was so soft that Jeonghan might’ve missed it had he not felt the rumbling in his chest. Jeonghan clenched his hands into the back of Minghao’s shirt, smoothing over the fabric when it wrinkled. “I’m just-” Just what? Jeonghan didn’t know what he was thinking, what was on his mind. He just knew it was clouded with Minghao. Jeonghan had been drunk more than a few times in his life, and he knew this was what the beginning stages of intoxication felt like. What did that  _ mean _ ? 

 

“I’m not sure.” Jeonghan settled. After all, that  _ was  _ what he was thinking. Minghao pulled insistently at a knot in his hair, but Jeonghan didn’t mind. “Not sure about what?” Minghao’s fingers were dragging up along his spine and it was distracting him from answering his questions. “You’re distracting me.” Jeonghan whined, squirming away from Minghao’s roaming hands, which only brought him impossibly closer to him. “How so?” Minghao questioned. He was grinning that devilish grin again, and Jeonghan had a sudden feeling of impending doom. “With your  _ stupid  _ pretty hands playing with my hair and rubbing my back, and overall being very  _ distracting.”  _ Minghao faked a scandalized face, and wrapped his hands around Jeonghan’s hips, pinning him down, and rolling over to straddle him all in one motion. 

 

“Jeonghan Yoon, is your mind taking a field trip to the  _ gutter _ ?” Minghao gasped in fake surprise. For once, it was Jeonghan who was rolling his eyes instead of the other. He decided quickly that it was more fun to play along than to deny Minghao an opportunity to tease. “Me? Never! I’m a saint, Minghao. The Virgin Mary, reincarnated.” Minghao openly cackled at that, and his hands moved up to pinch Jeonghan’s tummy between his fingers. “You? Jeonghan, you are the very definition of  _ sin. _ ” Okay, Jeonghan did  _ not  _ anticipate the drop in Minghao’s voice, or for his hands to settle on either side of his neck. He definitely didn’t expect Minghao to lean in for what seemed like a kiss. Jeonghan held his breath, staring up at Minghao, only to receive another devilish grin before his body was racked with ticklish screams.

 

“Minghao! Sto- ah!” Minghao planted his feet on the ground, gripped both of Jeonghan’s wrists between them, and dug his fingers into Jeonghan’s stomach. “Mingha-ah!” Jeonghan couldn’t catch his breath between yells of Minghao’s name and hysterical laughter. Meanwhile, Minghao’s face had scrunched into the smile Jeonghan loved so much. Eventually, after Jeonghan gave up on trying to buck Minghao off of him, Minghao heard Yeona begin to whimper, probably woken by all the noise coming from right outside her room. Minghao rolled off of Jeonghan, planting a soft kiss on his forehead, breath still a bit uneven. Jeonghan sat up, pulling Minghao back down to eye-level with him. 

 

Minghao looked at him questioningly for a moment before breaking out into a smile. Jeonghan reached behind Minghao, wrapping his hands around his neck, and connected their lips. Minghao smiled into the kiss, and giggled when Jeonghan began to play with the hair at his a nape. Yeona was crying by this point, so Jeonghan pulled away. “I told you that she needs to learn how to calm herself down. We can’t coddle her every time she cries.” Minghao whispered against his lips, eyes still closed. “Sure we can,” Jeonghan sighed, tugging at the hoops in Minghao’s ears. “You just won’t be very happy if I do.” Minghao smiled and wrapped his hands around Jeonghan’s wrists, pulling him to his feet. 

 

“This is the last time, okay?” 

 

“Okay,” 

 

It wasn’t the last time. 

 

~

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aahh yes i'm back on my domestic bullshit & happy to be here
> 
> let me know what you think! have a wonderful day/night :) ily <3
> 
> twt/cc: @gyuquartz
> 
> ~ cj


	17. Author's Note

it breaks my heart to say that i'm discontinuing this story. the plot hasn't gone the right way, the relationship developments aren't the way i want them, & i'm kinda at a loss event-wise. i didn't plan this story- i just sat down and wrote it without thinking. because of that, there's holes in the plot, and things don't connect the way they should. 

furthermore, i'm not enjoying the process of updating anymore. i'm procrastinating writing new chapters because i'm not sure what to write. i'm just not confident in the direction this story is going. 

i know this is disappointing, & i'm truly so sorry. this just isn't what i wanted it to be. i'll leave the story up for now, and maybe write a few alternate endings here and there, or edit what i can and publish it again as a finish story. but as of right now, happier here is discontinued until further notice. 

again, i'm very sorry. i love this story, but the characters and dynamics just aren't what i want. i hope you understand. 

thank you for reading. i love you all ♡

~ cj


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